When you start dating a new guy, you want to know if you’re really seeing signs he is pursuing you. You may be reading the signs wrong and you don’t want to get your hopes up.
I don’t want you to think that when a man shows you minimal effort, he’s worthy of your loving care. Just because he’s giving you the tiniest amount of his attention doesn’t mean that he’s genuinely trying to make you his girlfriend.
Some men will have a dramatic approach to this situation. They’ll knock on your door, rain-soaked and out of breath, just to confess their undying love for you.
Most will have a calmer approach, though. They’ll be a little bit more apprehensive when it comes to showing interest and you may have to look deeper into their actions.
What you have to understand is that a man who’s interested in you wouldn’t make you question his intentions. You’ll know right away if he’s pursuing you.
When a man sends you mixed signals, though, you can almost be sure he’s not interested and he’s just playing games with you.
But those same mixed signals may be a sign that the guy is experiencing emotional turmoil when it comes to you. He doesn’t know how to approach you or handle his feelings.
That’s probably the exact reason you’ve landed here reading this, isn’t it?
19 signs he is pursuing you
It’s horrible when you want to believe that someone is catching actual feelings for you, only for them to just laugh in your face when you ask them about it.
Men aren’t that hard to read, but sometimes we can get confused. Either you completely ignore his advances or you overanalyze them.
Believe it or not, men do that as well. That’s precisely why he’s pursuing you so subtly because he doesn’t want to scare you off.
He can’t just shout how amazing he thinks you are, confess his feelings, and then run off into the sunset with you.
That’s why he’ll be understated, but fortunately for you, you’ll still be able to see his intentions. Sometimes, he does certain things unknowingly simply because he wants to, without any hidden agenda.
So if you want to make sure that you’re seeing the right signs he is pursuing you, then continue reading! You’ll be surprised at the things men do for the women they’re interested in.
1. He always initiates communication
One thing that we can all relate to is that we want to constantly talk to the person we like. We want to know how their day’s been and what they’ve been up to.
We simply crave their attention and presence in some way, shape, or form. Even if it’s just over texts.
Texting can seem like a bore to some, but a good morning text will always put a smile on your face when it’s from the right person.
A lot of women love texting more than talking on the phone. So, the first thing you may notice is that he’s always the one to text you first.
He texts you to ask you something random, send you a meme, or just chat about nothing in particular. He does this because he’s really into you and wants to talk to you constantly.
A man wouldn’t do this unless he had feelings for you.
You know that many guys nowadays like to play games. They ghost you for a couple of days and then suddenly remember that you exist.
They always wait for you to make the first move and don’t mind standing on the sidelines while you do all the work.
That’s not what this guy is doing. If he wants you, he will almost always text you first and keep an actual conversation.
2. He asks you about your relationship status
On the dating scene these days, you never know if the people you’re seeing are seeing other people at the same time.
When a guy is pursuing you, he will ask you about your relationship status. He’ll ask if you’re in a relationship right now, if you’re seeing anyone, and also if you’re open to dating in general.
This information is quite important to know before he makes any further moves on you. He wants to know what your status is so that he can ask you out one day.
It may seem like a normal question to ask, but I can guarantee you that he’s not asking this because he wants to be friendly. You can see it in his body language and in the way he gets a little shy when he asks this.
3. He asks you out
One of the obvious signs he’s pursuing you is when he asks you out on a date. A guy who isn’t seriously into you wouldn’t even bother to organize something romantic for you both.
But a man who has feelings for you and wants to be with you will definitely ask you out on a date. He won’t waste time. He may even have a specific date and time in mind because he’s already made a reservation for you both.
This is a man who really wants to be with you and isn’t playing games with you. Romance is important to this guy because he knows that’s how he’ll win your heart.
4. He tries to make you smile
Men know that they need to make a woman laugh and smile in order to catch her attention. Humor is one of his strong suits and he’ll use it to its full extent.
He needs to make you smile and laugh because that confirms to him that you’re also feeling the chemistry between you two.
Besides, why wouldn’t he want to make you smile? This guy wants to see you grinning because that the closest thing to magic there is for him.
5. He smiles a lot when he’s around you
You can definitely distinguish a genuine smile from one that’s just for show. A guy will smile from ear to ear when he’s interested in you.
It’s one of the signs he is into you and wants to pursue you because it’s his natural response to you. When you’re around, his mouth has a mind of its own.
This is especially true when he sees you smile. Your smile engages him and he’s mesmerized by you.
A woman’s smile is one of her most attractive assets. To him, it’ll be even more special simply because he knows that he’s the reason behind it.
6. He touches you
There are many signs that show you he’s pursuing you, but not every one of them will make you blush as much as this one.
When he’s interested in you, he’ll touch you “accidentally.” And I’m talking the innocent kind of touch here.
His hands subconsciously reach out to you. He wants to touch you so that he can feel closer to you and it’s also a way for him to see how you’ll react to his touch.
He could also reach for you on purpose. One of the ways he’ll do that is to put a strand of your hair behind your ear.
Another example is when you’re walking through a crowd of people and he puts his hand on the lower part of your back.
These are very random examples, but they are all equally obvious. Your body will definitely remember if he touched you or not.
A guy who likes you will crave your touch yet he’s careful not to make you feel uncomfortable.
7. He noticeably flirts with you
It’s not really easy to ignore when someone’s flirting with you. But sometimes, flirting can be quite subtle and that’s why you’re so apprehensive to call it for what it is.
But if you’re being honest with yourself, he’s obviously flirting with you.
He winks at you, smiles at you seductively, makes comments that only you get, and often whispers to you so that no one else hears your conversations.
And even when you’re unsure if he’s flirting with you, you can see it in his body language.
Whenever you’re spending time together, he leans into you when you’re talking. He even makes sure to mimic your own body language. This only happens when you’re extremely attracted to a person.
Flirting is a good sign that he’s pursuing you – and hard!
8. He compliments you a lot
Men know that women want validation. It’s true! We love to be acknowledged for the efforts we put into looking the best we can.
Of course, a guy may compliment you casually, or he may compliment you because he only wants you physically. The difference lies in the intention and authenticity.
Any guy out there can tell you that you’re beautiful (because you objectively are), but not everyone can tell you that with this level of enthusiasm.
It’s a sign that he is obviously pursuing you – why else would he go out of his way to let you know how beautiful, smart, and witty you are?
You can get basic compliments from everyone, let’s be honest! But he sees just how much effort you’ve put into yourself and that’s exactly what he’ll compliment you on.
9. He makes plans for you two
Did you casually mention to him that you’ve never been hiking? Now, he’s planning an entire hiking trip for you two so that you can have the best experience of your life.
This is so adorable, because he makes a genuine effort to plan everything for you two!
Whether those plans are in the near or distant future, either way, he wants to spend more time with you and for you to stay in his life for a while longer.
He makes these plans so that he can show you he’s serious about you. If all he wants is to make you happy, you can take that as a pretty clear sign he is pursuing you.
10. He shows his affection through romantic gestures
Does he show you affection through different romantic gestures? Sometimes, they may be small acts of kindness. Other times, he’ll do something grand to surprise you and draw that beautiful smile of yours out.
He may show up at your workplace just to see you. Or he’s sure to make your coffee just the way you like it.
It’s those small acts of kindness that show you that he really does care about you. At some point, you might even feel like he’s doing too much for you, but believe me, he enjoys doing it all because he likes you.
So the next time he does something sweet – even if it’s something as small as leaving a sweet comment on your Insta post – just know that he really does like you.
11. He tells his friends and family about you
When we’re only casually seeing someone, we don’t really like to let the close people in our lives know much about them. I mean, things could go wrong and you can never be too careful.
Because of that, you didn’t expect to hear that he’s been telling everyone about you. Everyone knows who you are and they even may know little details about you.
He’s told you that his friends can’t wait to meet you. Imagine the importance you have in his life for him to go and tell everyone about you.
Especially his family. We don’t usually tell them about the people we’re casually seeing. But he obviously isn’t casually seeing you, he is pursuing you for something serious.
12. He opens up to you emotionally
It’s hard for most men to be emotionally vulnerable in front of a woman. They’re scared that they may be perceived as not masculine enough and that’s a big issue for them.
Because of that, a man will only open up emotionally to a woman he genuinely likes and trusts. This is one of the undeniable signs he is pursuing you.
He wants you to understand where he’s coming from with his emotions. He wants you to get to know him better so that you know that there’s so much more to him than meets the eye.
A relationship is way more than mere physical intimacy. This is the moment he’ll try to become your closest confidant and also confide in you.
He will fall for you even more if you give him space to express himself because you know just how tough this must be for him.
The right guy will try to show you that he’s vulnerable and in touch with his emotions. We don’t need emotionally detached men anymore.
13. He shows interest in the things you like
It’s strange, but we tend to show so much more interest in the things someone likes if we’re interested in impressing that person.
Does he watch all the movies you recommend to him? Does he take time to ask you questions about your interests so that he can learn more from you?
I would love to tell you that a man would do this even if he isn’t interested in you, but I’d be lying to you.
He does this so that you can see how dedicated he is when it comes to you. It also gives him the perfect opportunity to find new topics you two can talk about.
14. He drops everything for you
You know just as well as I do that the only people you will drop everything for are the people that mean the most to you in your life. Well, then why does he drop everything so easily just to spend more time with you?
For example, you might’ve told him that you’d love to see a movie that night and even though he had plans, he changed them to go with you. Who else would do this for you?
When a man is pursuing a woman, nothing seems too out of the ordinary to do for her. He’d prefer spending time with her over practically anything else.
15. He calls you endearing names
Nicknames are only reserved for the special people in our lives. You won’t go around and give a random stranger a nickname you just made up.
Endearing names are meant for the special people we really do appreciate and want to show them that they’re special. You’re definitely special to him if he makes the effort to give you a pet name and call you by it all the time.
It may be something simple like “baby“ or some sort of an inside joke that only you two share. Regardless, it’s very special when you know that someone out there has a special nickname for you.
16. He constantly mentions what a great boyfriend he’d be
If he is pursuing you because he really wants to be with you, he’ll tell you on multiple occasions what an amazing boyfriend he’d be.
You may mention something about your ex and he’d be quick to comment about how he will treat his future girlfriend so much better than your ex treated you.
He says that he’d know that you love to get flowers and that he would buy them for you randomly.
He is dropping hints and wants you to imagine him in the role of your boyfriend. This man wants to make sure that you have a clear image in your mind of how he would treat you if you gave him a chance to do so.
At this point, you know exactly how he would treat you if you had to become a couple.
17. He’s always there for you
We all know that men love to play the hero for the woman they’re interested in. They adore it when their hero instinct gets activated so that they can show you they can take care of you.
Whenever you need help around the house, he’s the first one running to help you out. He may even get mad or offended if you ask anyone else but him.
He’ll also be there for you when you’re upset about anything, helping you get comfortable and talking to you about it for hours if need be.
He will want to make you feel safe again, so he’ll be there for you until the moment you decide you don’t need him there anymore. This is what a real man will do for the woman he adores.
18. He wants to meet your friends
Every man knows that a girl’s friends have the biggest authority in her life and that they need to approve of him first.
But him meeting your friends may mean much more than them vetting him.
If you bring them up in conversation and he says something along the lines of “Your friends sound like fun, I’d love to meet them sometime if that’s okay with you?” that’s when you’ll know he’s pursuing you!
He knows that once he meets your friends and they like him, they’ll put in a good word for him and he’ll be one step closer to calling you his.
19. He always makes sure that you’re comfortable
Men aren’t really known for being observant creatures. But this guy is sure to put in the extra effort just to make sure that you feel good wherever you are.
When you’re at a party, he’ll ask you a couple of times if you feel okay with the crowd. And if you need anything, he’ll be right there to save you when another guy’s creeping you out.
He understands the importance of your boundaries and respects each one of them. He’s aware that you won’t be in a relationship with someone who makes you feel uncomfortable.
It’s definitely one of the signs he is pursuing you and he wants serious relationship with you.