Think aloud
What does cheating say about a person? Infidelity is chan issue almost all of us have to deal with at some point in our lives.
Cheaters aren’t some strange species, but only human beings who make mistakes. Still, some of them believe that infidelity isn’t such a big deal.
There are all kinds of cheaters, but there are traits most cheaters have in common. Today, we’ll focus on the question of what cheating says about a person’s character.
Are they terrible people because they cheated? Perhaps not, but there are some problems they need to work on.
You’ll see them once you find out all the traits that most cheaters have in common.
What does cheating say about a person’s character? It says that they are impulsive, inconsiderate and lack emotional strength, but that’s not all.
If you ever wondered what does cheating say about a person, you’ll find your answer here.
Maybe you have been cheated on or have been a cheater yourself. Either way, finding out the answer to what does cheating say about a person will help you.
If you have been cheated on, once you ask yourself what does cheating say about a person, you’ll be able to understand them better. You’ll learn about their flaws that their cheating has revealed, and it might give you some closure.
However, if you are the one who’s been a cheater or still is, I highly recommend that you learn what does cheating say about a person. It will help you figure out what’s behind all that infidelity, so you could try to change and become a better partner.
After all, nobody wants to be in a relationship with a cheater, even if they are ready to forgive them.
When you’re trying to figure out what does cheating say about a person, try to think of how society looks at it. Even when a partner is ready to forgive the cheater, society frowns upon the act of cheating.
They also say ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’, and there’s some truth to it. It rarely happens that someone cheats only once, but mistakes do happen.
Other times, which is actually most of the time, cheaters cheat again and that’s exactly why it’s important to find the answer to the question of what does cheating say about a person.
You’ll finally be able to understand how the mind of a cheater works. This is a great opportunity for you to change if you’re a cheater because you’ll learn what the real problem is.
What does cheating say about a person? The answers might surprise you, and they are coming right up.
What does cheating say about a person?
From being impulsive to having commitment issues, there are a lot of things that cheating says about a person.
The most important thing you need to remember is that it’s not your fault that you have been cheated on so don’t let a cheater convince you that it is.
If you’re a cheater, let this list help you see what you can work on to improve yourself. The only way for you to be in a happy relationship is to be in an honest one.
Here are the most common characteristics of people who cheat.
1. They are impulsive and lack self-control
People who cheat are emotion-driven and thoughtless and their emotions of desirability control them. They don’t have the willpower to reject new romantic opportunities.
These people have trouble saying, “No,” when they get the chance to hook up with someone new. They don’t value what they have and often have an underdeveloped intellect.
Cheaters seek emotional gratification and ways to boost it… instead of working on the relationship they are in.
Has your partner cheated on you? Well, you should know that they lack self-control.
They can’t stay faithful because they are so impulsive and also, they don’t really consider the consequences of their actions.
Cheaters make impulsive decisions, and it makes them feel invincible… but they never stop to think about how their choices may affect the person they’re with.
Truth be told, when the person you love cheated on you, they didn’t think about you, or how it could hurt you. All they thought of was their own satisfaction and the heat of the moment that led to it.
It’s hard to accept that the pain they caused you didn’t even cross their mind, but it’s even worse if it did. That would mean that they knew how much they would hurt and betray you, but they did it anyway.
2. They lack self-awareness and self-respect
They might be driven only by emotions, but they still have to make a conscious decision to be unfaithful. Cheaters decide that it’s okay to do it just because they want to do it, and it makes them feel good.
A lot of times, they use the excuse of being drunk, but is it really a good excuse? Even a drunken mind is still a mind that can make decisions on what matters.
Cheating is not always as simple as saying, “No”, but as long as you have in mind how your partner will feel, you shouldn’t do it.
You need to be aware of the consequences of your actions but cheaters start cheating when they don’t care about their image anymore.
They lack self-awareness and self-respect and act on primal instincts and what they also lack is appreciation, both for others and themselves.
They might think that it’s not right to cheat, but they don’t do what’s right and instead what feels good.
Those who care about being good and having moral values can’t cheat but cheaters don’t care about those things, they just want to feel good for a moment.
That moment of feeling good with another person is nothing compared to how good they would feel in a happy long-term relationship but they don’t seem to understand that.
I’m trying hard not to judge them too much, but all in all, cheating says bad things about the person who cheated. They have their own selfish reasons and don’t mind betraying the person they love.
It shows not only that they lack self-respect but that they don’t care about morality either.
3. They are self-centered and inconsiderate
Obviously, those who cheat are very self-centered. They don’t consider the long-term damage their short-term pleasure will cause.
Also, as I already said, they don’t think about how it will affect the person they’re in a relationship with. Only an inconsiderate and self-centered person could act that way.
A person who cheats on you doesn’t consider your feelings, and that’s not the person who’s right for you.
Often, a cheater wants to make themselves look like a victim. They find all sorts of excuses for their behavior and even blame their partner.
That’s not an excuse, and it never will be, no matter what their partner did to them. This is because, when you think about it, they could always break up with their partner if they weren’t happy in the relationship or try to work on it.
Cheating instead, just because you’re not happy in your relationship, is not an excuse.It doesn’t make it any less bad if your partner doesn’t make you happy.
As I said, you could always work on your relationship or break up. Cheating is dishonest and unfair to the person you’re with, no matter what your relationship is like.
4. They have low self-esteem
Why do people cheat? Well, the most common reasons have to do with their self-esteem.
Just think about it.
The worse someone views themselves and the more they crave recognition from those they value, the more likely it is that they will cheat. For most cheaters, it’s all about feeling more empowered and desired.
If you’re a cheater, you have to start working on your self-esteem before your need for recognition ruins your relationship. Open up to your partner and let them know that you need to feel more desired.
No amount of cheating will fix your low self-esteem, but your partner might be able to help you with that. Work on yourself instead of hurting others because of the way you view yourself.
Try to see yourself the way your partner sees you… and don’t ruin that by cheating on them and therefore making them see you differently.
5. They are untrustworthy
There’s a problem with people who have a way with words, and it’s that we trust them just because of it.
You are taught to be respectful and honest your entire life, so you start expecting the same from others. Still, you don’t get the same in return, and so you wonder why.
Cheaters have to be liars in order to get away with cheating, and like all liars, they are good with words. They don’t really feel guilty about their bad image, so they are good at telling all kinds of lies.
Some cheaters simply have scheming and dishonesty in their nature, because they have always got away with cheating and lying. Those who have such deep-rooted behavior are very hard to change.
They can promise you the moon on a string and make you believe everything they say. You believe that they love you and are committed to you because they know how to convince you.
What happens when it’s time to fulfill all those promises they gave you? Their actions don’t match their words because most of the time, they don’t mean the things they say.
Even when they do mean them, they postpone their promises because their emotions often change… and they can’t go through with what they planned, which is what makes them so untrustworthy.
Cheaters have an unpredictable nature, and it’s never certain that you can trust them.
6. They are unhappy in their relationship
Most of the time, those who cheat aren’t happy in their relationship. They are left feeling like they deserve better or more than what they have in their relationship so they keep their eyes open for new opportunities.
Once they get that opportunity, they cheat without guilt or shame.
Like all of us, cheaters believe that they deserve to be happy… even if that happiness can only be found without their partner. The reality, however, is that they try to justify their actions as if they had no other choice but to cheat.
As I mentioned earlier, being unhappy in a relationship is no excuse for cheating. After all, you can always try to fix what’s wrong in your relationship or break up.
If you aren’t happy with the person you’re with, see if there is something the two of you can do to change that. You’ll only know true happiness in your relationship once you’re completely honest with your partner… so maybe that is the only problem.
Otherwise, if there’s nothing you can do or you simply don’t love them anymore, be fair and break up with them. That way, you can be with anyone you want without it being cheating.
Don’t try to blame your partner for your unfaithful behavior.
7. They aren’t grateful
A cheater doesn’t value their loyal partner’s commitment or effort. They aren’t grateful for everything they have been through with their partner and all the beautiful memories they have together.
Cheating says it all and shows how they really feel about their partner. Remember that actions always mean more than words.
The truth is, you see your partner as who they say they are, but then their actions show who they really are. It breaks your heart, and you feel betrayed once you see them at their worst.
8. They are secretive and good at lying
When you’re a cheater, you have to be a liar too, and they are usually very good at it. They will come up with all sorts of excuses to cancel plans because they are tired… while they are actually with someone else.
Cheaters will do everything it takes to cover up their lies, and the saddest part is that they don’t regret lying. They play with your emotions without feeling guilty.
Most of the time, their partner will believe all their lies and ignore the warning signs. Their basic instinct is to keep the details of their personal life to themselves so that they can guard their privacy.
Cheaters don’t want to get caught, and the best way for them to achieve that is to be secretive. Most of them hide their phones and put passwords on their computers.
They are careful about what they say and give as few details as they can. Cheaters usually aren’t very active on social media, and often have more than one phone.
9. They always have a lot of excuses
As I already mentioned, cheaters will try to justify their actions and as a result, they won’t hesitate to blame their partner.
They often say that it was just a one-time thing and avoid taking responsibility but don’t let a cheater put rose-colored glasses on your eyes because they will definitely try to. They need to take responsibility for what they did and to learn that actions have consequences.
Please, don’t ever let a cheater convince you that it’s your fault that they’ve cheated. It’s not your fault, and it never will be.
They had a choice, and they chose to betray you. The decision was theirs only, and you had nothing to do with it.
As I repeatedly said, if they aren’t happy in their relationship, they can break up with their partner. There is no excuse for cheating, and the cheater needs to take responsibility for what they did.
Sometimes, it can really be a one-time thing, and the cheater might truly feel sorry about what they did. Still, it’s often not like that, and they will cheat again, but more on that later.
10. They are great at diverting topics
When cheaters are questioned, they divert the topic to something else. If you ask your partner about a certain colleague of the opposite gender and they change the topic of discussion, it’s suspicious.
Suddenly drifting off to something totally different is something all cheaters do when they are trying to hide an affair. Getting a cheater to admit what they have done isn’t an easy task, and they’ll do everything in their power to avoid it.
To sum it up, cheating requires dishonesty, and a cheater will never be honest with their partner. It doesn’t stop even once you have figured them out, because they’ll still try to avoid taking responsibility.
A relationship where one of the partners cheats is, of course, not a happy relationship… but the problem is that it most likely never will be. Even after you forgive them, you’ll never be able to fully trust them again… and what is a relationship without trust?
11. They will cheat again
It’s hard to trust someone who has cheated, because, more times than not, they cheat again.
That doesn’t mean that ‘a one-time thing’ never happens. It sometimes does, when a cheater makes a mistake and truly repents.
However, most of the time, a person who cheats will cheat multiple times. So, if you decide to forgive a cheater, you have to be aware that it’s very likely they’ll cheat again.
Sometimes, the bond in a relationship or marriage even becomes stronger after forgiving cheating, and the cheater becomes fully dedicated to their partner. That shouldn’t be ignored, but, again, more often, things don’t go that way, and cheaters stay cheaters.
I am a strong believer that people can change if given a chance, but sometimes, it’s too hard to risk it. So, whether you choose to forgive or not forgive is up to you.
If you have been a cheater, keep in mind all of these things and try to change because you might not get a second chance.
12. They are selfish and emotionally immature
Obviously, cheaters are selfish because they only think of themselves when they are cheating and this is actually the most common personality trait of cheaters. They only think about meeting their own needs, whether it’s in their relationship or outside of it.
This doesn’t mean that every selfish person is a cheater, but it does mean that every cheater is a selfish person.
It’s often said about cheaters that they are emotionally immature. That’s just an extension of them being selfish because they don’t see the effect their affair will have on their partner.
How do you recognize when someone is emotionally immature? Well, they put themselves first, more often than not.
They matter to themselves more than you do and don’t think about your needs in advance.
The way they argue seems greedy and self-centered and when you need their help, you’ll often feel that they don’t support you.
13. They have commitment issues
A lot of people who have been cheated on say that the cheater had commitment issues, which caused them to cheat. This means that that person didn’t wish to be tied down in the first place, because they aren’t satisfied being with one person.
Sometimes, the reason why cheaters cheat is to deliberately sabotage the relationship that they feel is starting to get too serious for them. Other times, by cheating, they are just trying to convince themselves that they aren’t in a long-term relationship.
Either way, it’s not fair to the person they’re with, and they need to work on themselves.
As for you, if you want to avoid being cheated on, avoid getting involved with those who have commitment issues. One day they might be ready to settle down, but if it’s not now, don’t pressure them and force them to be something they aren’t.
It’s not your fault if they cheat, but you shouldn’t try to tie down someone who obviously doesn’t want to be with one person. The only reason why you shouldn’t do that is that you’ll most likely end up getting hurt.
If you want to take that chance, it’s up to you and the same goes for whether you’ll forgive your partner for cheating or not.
I can’t decide for you, but I hope this article has given you some pointers about how cheaters think.
Good luck!
