Think aloud
After you’ve had a successful first date, you immediately start thinking about that second date kiss. Your cheeks are already blushing at the sheer thought of it, but you’re still unsure if you should go for it or rather wait a little longer.
At the very end of the first date, you already know if you’ll be seeing this guy again. All of the anxiety is gone and you actually feel comfortable hanging out with him.
So, the idea of going on a second date with him doesn’t scare you as much.
But there’s one thing on your mind that you can’t stop thinking about – the first kiss.
Some people believe that the second date is a perfect time to have your first kiss. You’ve gotten to know each other better the first time around, which means that you won’t be as nervous when you actually meet up again.
That’s why reserving the first kiss for the second date is a good piece of dating advice.
On the other hand, you have a lot of friends who told you that you should save it for the third date. That way, you’ll know for sure that both of you have serious intentions and want to take your relationship to the next level.
Because of these divided opinions, you feel like you’re torn. The first kiss is a big deal to you and you don’t want to ruin your expectations of it by going in too early for it.
So, what should you do right now?
Worry no more – I’ve got you covered! Read the following tips and you won’t feel as nervous about this whole thing anymore.
In the end, you’ll realize that the answer is easier than you’ve made it out to be.
Tips for the second date kiss!
There’s no hard-and-fast rule that the second date is ideal for that first kiss.
Some people believe that it’s the perfect timing, others would rather wait a bit longer, while some don’t even face this dilemma as they kiss their crush at the end of the first date already.
Because of others’ varying opinions and experiences, I get why it can be hard to figure out what you should be doing.
But, instead of pressuring yourself and questioning your friends about dating rules, it’s always best to listen to your heart.
A second date kiss is a safe decision as that’s the only way you’ll know that you’ve made the right call on this guy.
If you don’t feel the chemistry between you and your dating partner, then maybe you won’t even think about kissing him. If you notice that he’s not into you, you won’t see the need to pucker up.
You’ll simply feel what you’re supposed to and know that it will be the right decision.
Read through the following date tips as they might help you realize what things you should be doing in order to guarantee yourself the right experience.
Also, a clear perspective might help you figure out if you feel ready to go for the second date kiss or wait some more.
1. Think of your expectations for the second date
We all keep looking for dating tips from other people and rarely focus on what we want. We ignore our personal expectations and try to fulfill those of others.
If you do the same while trying to figure out if a second date kiss is a good idea for you, you’ll find yourself in a pretty uncomfortable situation.
After all, it will be the first time you’re sharing such an intimate act with the person who sparks your interest.
If you feel that you had a great date the previous time, then you’ll think of breaking out of the friend zone and taking your relationship to the next level.
On the flip side, if your previous date was a bust and you’re only going to the second one to confirm your feelings, you might not consider kissing at all.
Both of the options are fine and you shouldn’t blame yourself if you feel either way.
If you don’t see yourself kissing on a second date, then stop pressuring yourself to do so. Once you’re uncomfortable about something, there’s no way the end result will be satisfying.
If your date is a keeper, he’ll understand that you aren’t ready for a kiss and appreciate your decision. He won’t push you outside of your comfort zone.
So, think about what the second date means to you. How do you imagine it and what do you feel comfortable doing?
If you need more time to get to know the person better, then don’t rush anything. The world won’t end just because you’ve decided that you’re not ready to kiss on the second date.
2. Stop planning how and when a second date kiss should happen
How do you know if you should go for a second date kiss until the end of the date itself? There’s no way to know if things will run smoothly until you find yourself in that situation.
That’s why there’s no reasonable explanation why you should be planning your kiss in advance when you have no idea how will the date go.
Just because you had a great time on the first date, it doesn’t mean that things will go just as smoothly this time.
Your date might do something that repels you or say something annoying that you can’t stand. You never know how things will unravel until you physically go through it yourself.
So, instead of planning the exact moment you’ll reach out to kiss him, rather focus on other more important things.
If you already made the decision to kiss him but your date ended up being a catastrophe, your kiss won’t feel natural and you’ll feel guilty that you even went for it.
So, stop the planning and just see how things go. At the end of the day, if the date was awesome, feel free to go for it.
But don’t get ready for a date with an already made plan to have a second date kiss. Usually, dates like that never end well.
3. Respect the other person’s boundaries
After your first date, you already have in mind what your crush is like. You’ve already noticed some of the things about his personality.
Especially in today’s world where real-life dating turns into online dating. You’re always in touch with the guy you’re seeing, even if it means that you keep liking each other’s Instagram photos.
So, if you already know that he’s a shy guy who struggles to keep his cool when he’s in the company of women, you might try taking his personality into consideration.
If he still isn’t able to be himself when he’s with you, then maybe he isn’t ready for a kiss either.
Maybe a second date kiss to him sounds like too much and too soon, and if you see that, then you should respect his boundaries.
Don’t push him to do something he’s not ready for just because he’s a guy. In this case, it would be best for both of you to wait until the next date and then see where it’ll take you.
You don’t want to make the first move, only for him to pull away from you because he obviously doesn’t feel ready.
So, for the sake of both of you, it’s always better to take some time than to rush into it. And there’s nothing wrong with replacing a second date kiss with a third date one.
As long as both of you feel comfortable, you shouldn’t worry much.
You’re the one who writes the rules and you’re always allowed to change them.
4. Be sure that it’s a date
These days, it can be hard to figure out why you’re meeting up with a guy. Is it a date or is it simply hanging out? Is it leading to a relationship or will it end up being just a fling?
Are you’re going out with someone you met online or someone you’ve known for years?
If it’s a good friend of yours that you’ve been chatting with and went on one date with, then you should be sure that he sees your outing as a second date, not just two friends hanging out.
If you’re still in the friend-zone and you go in for a kiss, things might get awkward for both of you. So, better be safe than sorry and be sure that you’re actually meeting for a date.
Don’t put yourself in a situation where you’ll feel like hiding from a guy just because the two of you had some weird sort of misunderstanding.
5. Know where you stand
Even if you’d like to have a second date kiss, you have to know that it’s the right time for it and that your crush feels the same way.
The last thing you want is to find yourself in a situation where you lean in to kiss the guy and he backs out!
So, before taking things to the next level, you should first know where the two of you are standing right now.
If you notice that your crush isn’t interested in you, why would you even consider kissing him in the first place? The chances are that he won’t like the idea and will reject you.
If you keep giving him hints that you like him and he keeps acting like a friend, why even try to go for it? It’s obvious that you’re not on the same page but going in completely different directions.
Sometimes, we confuse the pictures we’ve created in our heads with reality. Because of that, we often find ourselves in situations that could’ve been avoided easily if only we were objective.
So, before making that strong eye contact that precedes a kiss, and before you reach out for his lips, first be honest with yourself and admit where you’re standing. It’ll save you a lot of embarrassment and, potentially, heartbreak.
6. Make sure you’re both relaxed and comfortable with each other
If you see that your date is going well, you’ll want to go for that second date kiss. But before you opt for that, it’s important that both you and your crush feel relaxed.
If anyone of you two feels uncomfortable with each other, things won’t work out the way you expect them to.
You want everything to feel natural and like it’s meant to be. That’s the only way you won’t regret reaching for his lips.
To be sure that both of you feel your best and that nerves haven’t take a toll on you, make sure to keep the conversation going.
Find topics that are of interest to both of you and see where they take you. When both of you become active participants in the conversation, it’s way easier to keep the ball rolling.
Also, don’t restrain yourself from making jokes. Humor is the best way to get both of you relaxed. If you see that you can laugh together, you’ll instantly feel comfortable with each other.
Now that you’re on the same page and comfortable around each other, you can proceed with a second date kiss. Fingers crossed that it’ll be amazing!
7. Go with the flow
You’ll know best when the right time is to kiss your date. Something will click in your head and you’ll know that the timing is perfect.
And just because you haven’t yet come to the end of the date, it doesn’t mean that you must save kissing for later. Especially if you’re sensing that your crush is thinking about the same thing.
And trust me, you’ll be able to see it. His body language will give him away.
You’ll notice that he’ll lean toward you so he absorbs every word you say. He’ll open his posture and keep following your lead. His eyes will get focused on you and he won’t be able to look away.
You’ll see a significant difference in behavior when he decides that he wants to bring his lips closer to yours.
At that moment, the worst thing you can do is think about if it’s the right time. Instead of analyzing the situation and wondering if you should wait till the end of the date, just go with the flow. Give yourself over to the moment.
If it feels natural and spontaneous, then there’s no need for you to stop it. There’s no need to try to remember what others have told you about when you should kiss him. What works for one doesn’t have to work for others.
So, shut off your brain for a second and listen to what your heart wants. If it’s telling you that you’re doing the right thing, then don’t stop yourself.
Who cares if you get your second date kiss at the beginning of the date instead of its end. That’s only a limitation you’ve been putting onto yourself.
8. Start with a hug
A hug is the best way to break the ice and not come off as too aggressive. Still, both of you know that a hug will most certainly turn into a kiss.
Also, a hug gives you a better realization of what the other person wants.
If you notice that your crush is trying to escape your hug and can’t wait for it to be over, then it’s a red flag that he doesn’t want to kiss you either. In that case, don’t reach for your second date kiss as it will most likely be a fail.
But if you notice that the other person is enjoying the hug as much as you are, then you stand strong chances of your lips meeting.
And even if you do reach for his lips and he moves away in order to avoid the kiss, know that it’s not the end of the world. He rejected a kiss on the second date – it’s not like he rejected your marriage proposal.
Maybe your crush still doesn’t feel ready, but that doesn’t mean that your kiss won’t happen sometime down the road.
9. Don’t overthink it
You could sit down and create a list of what it means if he does or doesn’t give you a second date kiss.
You can create an analysis on when it could happen, what it should feel like, and how you should act after it.
But at the end of the day, the more you keep thinking about it, the harder you make it for yourself.
So, instead of pressuring yourself and overthinking every step of the date and where it will take you, relax. Let things pan out as they’re destined to.
It’s just a kiss. No matter if it happens or not, there’s nothing to worry about.
You could kiss each other by the end of the second date and then completely stop seeing each other afterward. Or you could not receive a kiss until the fifth or sixth date and still end up in a relationship.
So, at the end of the day, a kiss doesn’t signify anything. If it happens, good for you, and if it doesn’t, you shouldn’t worry about it.
Rather focus on your date and make sure to get to know your crush better. Listen actively to what he has to say and let him show you who he actually is.
Get to know each other better and figure out that you’re a perfect match. Then a simple thing like a second date kiss will be the last thing on your mind.
You’ll realize that you’re fine even if it doesn’t happen because you still had a great night.
10. Even if it doesn’t happen, don’t get discouraged
Date night with your crush ended and you came home devastated because you didn’t get your second date kiss. You keep wondering if there was something you did wrong and if it was your mistake.
Do you think you should be doing this? Do you really think that one stupid kiss is worth the stress?
There could be many different reasons why your crush didn’t end up kissing you by the end of your night. And it doesn’t instantly mean that it was your fault.
Maybe he simply didn’t feel ready for it and he didn’t want to ruin the connection you two had with one sloppy kiss. So, he’d rather wait until he feels more comfortable than pressure himself and regret it.
Also, it could be a good thing that you haven’t yet kissed because you also may have realized that you don’t like the guy the way you expected to. You might not even want to continue seeing him anymore.
No matter what, there’s no need for you to spend sleepless nights thinking about that one kiss you didn’t get. That way, you’re putting unnecessary pressure on yourself.
Also, if you receive that second date kiss but it feels weird, don’t worry about it. The first kiss is rarely as magical as they describe them in books or movies.
It will take both of you some time to adapt to each other and ignite the spark.
If it happens from the first kiss then you’re golden. But if you need more time to get to where fireworks go off the second you touch lips, don’t feel devastated.
That’s normal and there’s nothing to worry about. The next time, you’ll already feel less nervous and your kiss won’t feel as clumsy as the first one.
Good luck on your second date and I hope that you’ll enjoy it! And if you feel that it’s the right thing to do, then don’t be afraid to go for that second date kiss!
