Think aloud
So, you’ve met this intelligent, good-looking guy and you’ve been dating for a while now. You exchange texts and calls, and it seems as if everything is going great. Then suddenly, he goes into silent mode and you haven’t heard from him all day.
I understand that it’s quite tough for you now that he hasn’t texted you all day because you’re already head over heels for him. You don’t know whether or not you should give him a call or contact him on social media.
You’re worried and paranoid that something might’ve happened to him. And you’re looking to find answers to questions that are running through your mind, but it’s impossible to find any solution.
Just stop with the worrying and frustration. I know that you want him so much, but it’s not a good idea to bomb him with messages or calls.
I know you’ve caught yourself staring at an empty screen, thinking he’s with someone else having fun while you’re at home waiting for him to text you back. But don’t worry that much – there’s a solution to every problem.
This sudden and unexpected silence can hurt for sure. However, it’s not the end of the world, so there’s no need to drive yourself crazy with obsessive and pessimistic thoughts.
If you barely know him and you just started to get to know each other better, then you probably don’t know what his daily routine is. It could be that he just doesn’t have enough time to reply to your text.
So, stop letting your mind run wild with all kinds of thoughts. Take a look at possible reasons why he might not be texting and what to do in such a scenario.
Why you haven’t heard from him all day
Being in a healthy relationship means that you have your own full, gorgeous life. You have your own interests, hobbies, friends, so you shouldn’t be waiting around to hear from him.
After all, you don’t want a partner who has nothing better to do than text you all day. But the situation is getting on your nerves a bit and it’s understandable that you want to get to the bottom of this.
1. He’s overwhelmed
Let’s say that you were on a date last night and now you haven’t heard from him all day. You opened up to him about your past because you felt comfortable talking about that kind of stuff with him.
Despite your good intentions, it’s better to keep some things to yourself. Unloading all your personal stuff on him too quickly could cause him to feel a bit overwhelmed.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that you should be a closed book and not tell him anything about yourself. Opening up bit by bit is alright, but being honest about everything prematurely is never the right move.
Perhaps you don’t know this, but some men don’t know how to react when a woman is being honest. That kind of emotional stress puts them in an uncomfortable position and they simply shut down. That could be the reason you haven’t heard from him all day or even several days.
2. He’s moved on
There’s a chance that the guy you’re into doesn’t feel the same way about you. It could be that he ignores your texts and calls altogether because he’s moved on and wants you to do the same thing.
Truthfully, many guys are very bad at verbalizing what they’re feeling, so don’t expect him to tell you everything that’s on his heart the moment you two meet. He’ll gradually open up to you, but you have to be patient.
On the other hand, some men don’t possess that kind of emotional intelligence and rather than telling you straight to your face that they don’t like you, they’ll drag it out for days and wait for you to get the message.
So, if you haven’t heard from him all day or a couple of days, then it may just be that he’s moved on from you. Perhaps he’s even looking for another girl to date. I mean, in the world of dating apps, it’s not that hard to find someone new.
Don’t worry too much about this if you’ve only recently met and been on a couple of dates before he ghosts you. Chances are that you didn’t fall for him that hard and that you’ll recover fairly easily.
3. He didn’t understand what you meant
There’s a huge difference between talking to someone via texts and talking in person with them. You can understand when the other person is joking and if they’re serious or not when you’re having a face-to-face conversation.
But the downside of texting with your potential partner through text is that sometimes it can be impossible to decipher the meaning of those messages.
So, if you haven’t heard from him all day and he hasn’t replied to you, maybe he’s trying to figure out what you meant in your message. He’s thinking whether or not you were joking or being sarcastic.
If you haven’t spent enough time together and don’t know each other that well, it can sure be difficult to discern tone in texts.
4. He’s extremely busy
You have to be honest with yourself and consider the fact that he might be extremely busy and that’s why you haven’t heard from him all day. It could be that he’s really caught up with work and can’t find the time to reply to your text message.
He might also be the type of person who isn’t always glued to his phone but prefers to take a break from it. Heck, maybe his parents are in town and he wants to spend some time with them. Or that he went on a hiking trip with his friend and didn’t think he had to give you a heads-up.
5. He wants you to text him first
Some guys are pretty self-aware about their image and don’t want to come across as desperate. Or maybe your guy is too shy to approach you for a second date.
He might not be one of those men who take the initiative and send a text message. Instead what he’ll do is wait for you to take control and make the first move. If you haven’t heard from him since your last date, this could definitely be the reason why.
Also, it may just be that he wants to play hardball to see how you’ll react. He made the first move, took you out on a date, and now is waiting to see if you’re interested in him too. Guys sometimes play these kinds of games with you on purpose to better gauge your level of commitment.
6. He’s annoyed by your text bombs
In order for you to decipher why you haven’t heard from him all day, you need to step back and take a look at what you’ve done. Have you been dropping text bombs and stalking his social media profiles all day?
If he has a lot on his plate right now – say, he’s working on a project or on the road – when he notices his phone blowing up with all these notifications, that might make him anxious. That’s especially true if you’re the type of person who sends a series of short sentences instead of a big one.
He might be annoyed by you and doesn’t have time or desire to respond to you. And if he gets all these in the middle of something important, then you better believe that he’ll put you on hold and move away so he can focus on the task at hand.
7. He already has a girlfriend
Tell me this: Does your potential boyfriend respond to you only at a particular time of the day? Or he doesn’t reply to you for several days and then suddenly out of the blue, you get a text message from him telling you that he misses you?
Does he reply at weird hours? Or maybe he’s blocked you from seeing his social media profiles? All those things can certainly cause you to question his intentions. It’s quite possible that he already has a girlfriend but is doing everything he can to hide this from you.
If this is the case, if you smell anything fishy or see anything sketchy, walk away immediately and focus on yourself. He’s not worth your time or effort, and you’re better of being single.
What to do if you haven’t heard from him all day
Even if he says he’s really into you, his actions don’t prove to you that’s true. I understand that you’re doubting him, but there are some things you can do if you haven’t heard from him all day or for several days.
1. Enjoy your life and make sure he sees that
If you really want to rub it in his noise for not texting you all day, then you should definitely shift the focus from him to yourself and enjoy life. After all, you don’t know what’s happening and where he disappeared to all of sudden.
Are you sure you want to even wait for him to reply to you? I hope not.
Don’t worry if he’s lost interest in you because there’s plenty of other fish in the sea. And if he hurt you in some way and you feel awful about yourself, then the worst mistake you can make is to let him see that.
Instead, call your friends, go out, have some fun, and be sure that he knows it.
Post some interesting photos on your social media profile of you doing crazy things in front of his friends. You can be sure they’ll tell him they saw you and that you were having a blast.
Although the feeling of disappointment won’t go away that easily, at least you’ll have some fun and not think about him for a while.
And if he does decide to send you a text message after he sees that you’re enjoying your life, don’t text him back immediately. Being too available is the wrong move.
What you need to do is make him wait just like you waited for him. It’ll drive him crazy and he’ll think about the consequences of his actions.
Show him you’re not the kind of woman who puts someone else on the top of her priority list while she’s being taken for granted by others. Prove to him how strong you really are and walk away. But whatever you do, don’t ever let him see that his actions or silence hurt you.
2. Never drunk text him
I understand it’s quite hard to control yourself when you’ve had one too many, but that’s why you have your friends to stop you from doing things you’ll certainly regret later on.
Always be open to them because you never know when they might save you from being heartbroken. And if you ask them to make sure you don’t text him, I’m positive that they’ll do anything they can to prevent it.
They want what’s best for you. They don’t want to see you sad and crying all day in your room.
So, be careful because most girls will drunk text when going through a breakup. And if you do that, he will see he has you in the palm of his hand and might use that to his advantage to lure you back into his trap. He’ll also realize you’ll always be available for him and won’t mind if he vanishes or ignores you all day.
But the worst thing is that you’ll feel awful about yourself. The guilt will force you to question your own sanity and whether or not you really do have control over your own life.
3. Ignore him even if he comes back
Let’s be real for a second here. You aren’t the type to ever settle for being someone else’s second option, am I right? That’s why you need to ignore him completely even if he comes to his senses and contacts you.
If you see his name pop up on your phone, just don’t answer. Continue with your work.
Show him that you don’t deserve to be treated that way. That you respect yourself enough to burn all bridges between you and him. Sometimes you aren’t able to express yourself through words and you need to do it with action. And that’s exactly what’s happening here.
He might choose to ignore some of your words or calls. But once you start giving him the silent treatment, he’ll realize that you’re in control of your own life.
These kinds of situations can hurt a person a lot, but it’s better if this happened before you two started a real relationship. Imagine being married to a man who has the brazenness not to talk to you all day even though he knows you need him.
So, don’t be disappointed by his behavior. Also, don’t lose faith in love just because one guy decided not to contact you all day. Yes, he’s bad, but that doesn’t mean that the rest of them are the same.
After you take some time for yourself and heal properly, you’ll be able to meet someone new.
4. Don’t contact him anymore under any circumstances
If you haven’t heard from him all day or, worse yet, for a couple of days straight, then you’re probably freaking out. You’re eager to find out what’s happening to him. It’s difficult to restrain yourself from sending him dozens of messages, but trust me, that’s the worst thing you can do.
You shouldn’t be the one to break the silence and call him crazy. Rather, leave him alone and give him all the space he needs to text you back when he decides to do so.
Your dignity and mental health should be top priorities. There’s no need to run after a guy who doesn’t seem to care about you. If he was worried about you, then he’d contact you immediately because he knows you’re thinking about him.
5. Spend your time with another man
You want him to see that he’s no longer the main character in your story, am I right? So, if you want to feel better about yourself and as a bonus, let him know that you’re over him, then simply replace him with another man.
You don’t have to feel bad or be alone if you haven’t heard from him for days. It’s his mistake that he wasn’t there when you needed him and he needs to pay the price for it.
Give your attention to another man and slowly move on with your life without him. Try to find someone who will actually satisfy your needs and wishes, and who’ll recognize how valuable you truly are.
You can even post photos of yourself and this new guy on social media. Pretend that you’re so busy enjoying your time that you’re not affected by his actions in any way.
Eventually, you’ll feel great and he’ll realize what an idiot he was for taking you for granted.
6. Know you’re worth more
When you find yourself in a situation where you haven’t heard from him all day, it’s easy to blame yourself. After all, you think that it’s all your fault and you might start to have trust issues.
I can’t stress it enough: You need to accept that you’re not the problem.
Take a step back and think about what he’s done for you and how little value he’s actually brought into your life. You’ll see that he isn’t worth your time or energy at all.
Find the strength that I know you have and walk away from him. It may be hard to get over him, especially if you were in a romantic relationship, but you’ll erase him from your heart after some time.
Your self-esteem and confidence will increase only after you let him go. Trust me, it’s better for you to be single than in an unhappy relationship where your voice is ignored by your partner.
Don’t bother crying yourself to sleep every night and worrying where he might be. Embrace your emotions and move on until you’ve reached the point where you feel as if nothing ever happened.
The sooner you accept that he isn’t interested in you and that he doesn’t prioritize you, the easier will be for you to emotionally heal.
7. Show him what he’s lost
There are some things you can do if you really want to get your revenge for not hearing from him all day or a couple of days. And the easiest one is to show him what he’s lost.
What I mean by this is you should strive to be the best version of yourself. Put on your best dress, go out, and have fun. If you do see him in a coffee shop or in a club, don’t bother talking to him. Just pretend that he’s not even there.
Your happiness will definitely hurt him more than anything you might say to him. Accept your negative emotions, but at the same time, don’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry.
It’s okay that you cared for him, but he probably thought that you’d always be available and that he can do whatever he wants with you.
If he was immature enough to walk away, then you should be intelligent enough to let him go. A man like that doesn’t deserve to have you in the first place.
Being in a relationship with him would be torture and you’d never be truly happy. On top of that, you’d never experience what it means to be loved by someone with all their heart. And your heart would always seek something that you could never have with him.
