Being in love and in a healthy relationship should make you feel complete, secure, and like you’re capable of achieving anything. But you need to be really certain that your significant other genuinely loves you. That’s why it’s necessary to pay attention to the signs she is pretending to love you.
We live in a world of fake relationships. In this tech age, many couples are rather focused on displaying their relationship as being perfect when the reality is quite different.
It’s an illusion of two people loving and caring for each other who seem to honestly try to make the relationship work. Yet the red flags are completely pushed back and their actions don’t match their supposed emotions.
This is why signs she is pretending to love you begin to emerge slowly at the early stages of a relationship. While you may ignore them in the beginning, these signs grow stronger with time, and eventually, the bond you two share becomes endangered.
But why would anyone in their right mind choose to ignore their real feelings and pretend to love someone? Well, there are various reasons a person would deceive their partner.
Sometimes, people do it because they’re afraid of their real feelings and aren’t strong enough to face them. Others might do it for the money and are simply gold diggers who want to take advantage of you.
A relationship like this lacks any real emotional connection and affection. The “love” they have for their partner is forced and hangs on a thin thread.
Signs she is pretending to love you
Some partners who fake their feelings might take you to parties with them to show everyone that they’re taken. Or it could be that they want to brag about their relationship on their social media profile.
Those types of girls don’t seem to be bothered to not show anyone the real truth. It could be that you’re just a temporary boyfriend to them who they’ll leave once another opportunity arises.
But how can you tell if someone is pretending to love you? Can you really figure out whether or not your love is real love? And are there any warning signs that your partner is only using you to satisfy their needs?
Well, if you’re suspicious about your partner’s feelings for you and don’t want to be easily fooled, then you should look out for the clear signs she is pretending to love you.
They can help you decipher if your girlfriend’s intentions are sincere or you’re just being taken for granted.
1. She treats you differently when you are in a group
One of the obvious signs she is pretending to love you is when her charm exceeds your expectations only when you two hang out with others or in a group setting.
A girl like that is only with you because she doesn’t want others to see her as single. She’s afraid that people might say that she’s unable to have a boyfriend or that no one wants her.
Basically, she is putting on a show for society.
The moment her friends are out of the picture, she gets bored and stops kissing you. That’s when she reveals her true face. Your once caring girlfriend turns into this cold, ruthless woman who clearly doesn’t love you.
Also, another sure sign that she’s feigning love is when she shies away from affection out of the public eye. Yes, she’ll lock arms with you when walking down the street or hold your hand at her favorite restaurant, but that all disappears once the two of you are alone.
This is highly uncommon for a woman who’s honestly in love and occurs only when she doesn’t care anymore.
2. She makes excuses constantly
Every time you try to confront her about something, she always makes an excuse as to why she can’t talk right now and would rather do something else. A woman with no genuine love for you will come up with excuses for everything she can’t make up for.
If she refuses to spend time with you, then she’ll tell you that she’s busy and needs to be somewhere else. If she isn’t there when you need her, she’ll find some reason for her lack of availability.
And if you talk to her and say how your previous girlfriends were more attentive and affectionate, then she’ll again come up with an excuse for her lack of love.
Such a romantic relationship has no future, and sooner or later, you’ll realize that. Perhaps your family members have already pointed out to you that she’s constantly neglecting you, but you refuse to accept it because you think she’s a better person than that.
But things won’t change, believe me.
3. She looks to replace you during your absence
You’ve heard the saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder,” and that’s actually true. A person who genuinely loves you will miss you the moment you leave their presence.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a business trip or if you’ve had to move somewhere else, your absence will create a void in their heart, and they won’t be able to feel whole and happy without you.
If a girl really loves you and you’re not there to comfort her, then she’ll think about you all the time and make plans for when you’re going to see each other again. On the other hand, if your girl is simply looking to replace you during your absence, then that’s a telltale sign she is pretending to love you.
The truth is, she doesn’t feel fulfilled when she’s with you and probably thinks that you bring no value to her life. A woman like that won’t miss you at all because you don’t matter to her.
As soon as you leave her, she’ll grab her phone and try to substitute you with someone else. She’ll want to spend her time with other men, but she won’t break up with you.
4. She shows no interest in knowing you better
Spending time with your significant other gives you an opportunity to get to know them on a deeper level. You’re curious about their lives; you’re interested in knowing their secrets and dreams.
But that only happens when you truly love the person. When you care about someone, their hobbies, past relationships, and friends are important to you. You want to understand them as a person because they’re a part of you now.
On the flip side, if your girl doesn’t show any interest in getting to know you and your life better, then you don’t need to be unsure about her feelings because she is most likely pretending to love you. Her lack of interest is a bulletproof sign that she’s been lying to you and is afraid to tell you the truth.
Ask yourself this: Does she seem interested when the two of you are on a date? Does she even ask you how your day has been? Does she try to comfort you when she sees that you’re upset?
If your answer is no, then you know that her feelings for you aren’t genuine and she’s probably just looking for a way out of your relationship.
5. She rarely listens to you
Being able to tell your partner everything and knowing that they’ll listen to you is a must when you’re trying to keep your relationship healthy.
Your partner has to actively listen to what you have to say if they honestly care about you. That means that none of your worries will go unnoticed and they’ll remember everything you share.
On the other hand, if your woman doesn’t love you, then chances are that everything you tell her will go in one ear and out the other. Women, in general, are good listeners and highly attentive. But your girlfriend behaves differently and there’s a specific reason for it: She is pretending to love you.
Only a woman who is truly invested in you will remember the smallest details about you. Therefore, if you’re in a relationship with a girl who doesn’t register what you’re saying and seems distant when you’re talking to her, you can bet she no longer loves you – or maybe she never did.
I know it hurts to hear this, but it’s better to know this now than to be stuck in a loveless relationship.
6. Lack of grand gestures
You can’t expect a girl who doesn’t love you to buy you any expensive gifts or do any kind of adorable gestures at all. You’d be lucky to receive even a thank you after you helped her with something.
That’s just how fake relationships work. You simply don’t care how the other person feels and whether or not they’re happy with you.
Also, cooking a meal for you when you’re tired and exhausted is off the cards because your well-being doesn’t matter to her. She doesn’t want to cheer you up when you’re feeling low or bring you some food when you’re sick.
Therefore, if you’re wondering if she is pretending to love you, just pay attention to the last time your partner did something for you that made you feel special and happy.
A person who shows genuine interest in you will shower you with gifts and compliments because they consider themselves lucky to have you in their life. They’ll celebrate even your smallest victories and will always make you feel special.
7. She doesn’t take you seriously
A partner who lacks love for you will not take your plans or arrangements seriously. Instead, she’ll disregard your every decision and plan, and she’ll do as she pleases – depending on where her mood takes her.
Her emotions will drive her actions and she won’t respect your wants and needs. Perhaps you’ve been planning a trip for the two of you for months, but at the last minute, she changes her mind and says she has other things to do.
She won’t show appreciation when you make an effort to spend some time with her. She’s unbothered by your feelings and doesn’t consider your relationship anything serious.
Her lack of concern becomes apparent after a while, and that’s when you’ll realize that you’re in a fake relationship. At first, it might be difficult for you to accept it, but the longer you deceive yourself and hope that things will change, the harder will be to recover from it.
Sometimes it’s for the best to listen to your gut and accept things as they really are.
8. She never makes you her priority
There are times where it’s difficult to determine how much you mean to someone. You want to know your place in someone’s life, but don’t know how to get that information from them.
One way to gauge that is by observing how much your partner prioritizes you when others are around. A partner who loves you with all their heart will always put their significant other on top of their priority list, no matter what.
So if you’re looking for signs she is pretending to love you, observe the priority your girl gives you in every situation and you’ll have your answer.
Does she spend less time with you than with her friends? Do you feel like others matter to her more than you? Or do you believe that she’s treating you as her backup? If these ring true for you, then it could be that she’s faking her feelings for you.
9. She refuses to compromise
Sacrificing and compromising for the benefit of both partners is essential when you’re trying to build a future together.
If you truly love your girlfriend, then you’ll be ready to compromise and even change your habits if you have to for the happiness of both. This is a strong indicator of real love.
Unfortunately, if your girlfriend isn’t ready to make that kind of sacrifice for your relationship, then that’s a clear sign she’s not ready to invest everything she’s got into your relationship.
Her lack of effort is proof that her feelings for you are fake and such love will only lead to heartbreak. And when you’re going through difficult times, your love for her will be pointless because she won’t have the desire to sacrifice herself for you.
10. Your conversations are dull
We already mentioned that one of the signs she is pretending to love you is when she doesn’t listen to you, but her lack of interest in you doesn’t end there.
A woman like that will put zero effort into having productive, fruitful talks with you. Your conversations will be monotonous and dull, to say the least. You will never progress into anything and whenever you do chat, it will feel forced and deliberate.
It’s mentally exhausting to be in a relationship like that. You always feel like you need to go the extra mile to attract your partner. And even if you do that, she barely shows any interest in hearing what you have to say.
In that case, you don’t need to search for any more signs because the answer is obvious: She has no real feelings for you.
11. She doesn’t introduce you to her parents
Introducing your significant other to your parents is usually considered to be a big step in a relationship. You’re not only seeking your parents’ approval, but you’re also showing them that you consider your partner an important part of your life now.
Yet, one of the signs she is pretending to love you is if she doesn’t even bother to have you meet the family. In that case, whenever you bring that topic up and ask her to introduce you to them, she’ll find an excuse to avoid it.
She might say that her parents aren’t comfortable meeting you or that she has never introduced any of her previous boyfriends and wants to keep it that way. Whatever the reason may be, the fact that she keeps putting it off is a cue that her feelings for you are fake and that you’re not as important to you as you thought you were.
12. She refuses to talk about your future together
If your girlfriend doesn’t talk with you about your future, then she’s not taking your relationship seriously and is probably only pretending to love you.
When you’re madly in love with someone, then you want them to be present in your life forever. On the other hand, in a one-sided love relationship, the “non-lover” knows that things are going to end, so there’s no point in making any future plans together.
Yes, she may enjoy showing you off on social media, but the fact that she ignores you whenever you mention some long-term plans is a clear sign that your relationship is on its last legs.
What to do when someone pretends to love you
I understand that it’s heartbreaking to hear your partner saying “I love you” when you know those words mean nothing to them. And it’s tough to end things with a person who means a lot to you, but you have to do it for your own sake.
If you stay too long in an unloving relationship, you’ll lose your self-esteem and confidence, and you’ll also miss out on experiencing someone genuinely loving you.
1. Sit down and tell her everything that’s on your heart
If you notice any of the above-mentioned signs, the best way to deal with the situation is to confront your partner and tell her everything that’s on your heart. Sit down and lay all your cards on the table.
Also, encourage your partner to do the same and maintain eye contact with her so that she knows you’re honest. Tell her everything that’s been bothering you and why you think your relationship is fake.
If her feelings for you are real, then she’ll listen to you and accept your opinion. But if she refuses to change, then it’s for the best to go your separate ways. You shouldn’t give her any more chances because such relationships aren’t worth saving.
2. Don’t stay friends with her
Is your partner pretending to love you? If yes, then there’s no point in staying just friends with her after you two break up.
Instead, take some time off to emotionally heal and focus on your own life. If you continue to be involved in her life, then she’ll further take you for granted.
Pretending to be happy even though you despise her won’t help you forget about her. You have to let it go and stand firm in your decision.
She might try to get you back because she can’t handle being single, but it’s your duty to turn her down. Prioritize your own heart and soon you’ll see the fruits of your labor.
3. Work on improving yourself
The first step in achieving freedom is realizing that she doesn’t deserve you in the first place. Take a step back and do a bit of reorganization in your life.
Set new boundaries and don’t let anyone cross them. It’s difficult to recover from heartbreak, but once you start working on yourself, you’ll feel happier and more satisfied.
4. Enjoy life
It’s difficult to leave someone you knew was never yours in the first place. But when you change how you view things, you’ll see that you actually won and that she is the one who lost everything.
So, don’t you lock yourself up in your room and mope over a person who never truly loved you. Go out and enjoy your life to the fullest!
Don’t allow her to string you along. Reclaim control of your life. Take this awful experience as a lesson and move on.