Exploring The Dark Side Of INFJ: 4 Things That May Surprise You

Destructive behavior
By Jane Ackles
👇

If you want to learn about the dark side of INFJ, you have to read carefully.

All of us are unique in our own way. Even if you tried hard, you wouldn’t be able to find two people that are exactly the same. This is okay because if we were all the same, then the world would be a boring place.

As for Myers-Briggs’s sixteen personality types, we can definitely say that they differ from each other in various aspects.

There are a lot of things that affect and shape us into the person we are today. Starting from our childhood years to different experiences in education fields, romantic relationships, and family bonds.

All of this can impact us and pave the way for us. However, not everything is as it seems. When meeting someone for the first time, they’ll generally want to give the best impression they can.

We all know that first impressions matter the most, but they can also be deceiving. Some people aren’t what they present themselves to be.

But also, you can’t judge a person based on seeing them once in specific surroundings and situations. Most of us will change our demeanor every once in a while when we feel stressed and when there’s something impacting us.

I know you’ve also felt that way sometimes. Life isn’t a movie or a book where everything goes smoothly according to script.

The dark side of INFJ

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There are things that will rock our world in both positive and negative ways. No one likes the latter option, but that’s part of life, isn’t it?

The major thing that differentiates is how we deal with those types of situations. As for the INFJ personality type, they’re known for being quite introverted and living in their own bubble.

They’re not the type to gladly express their feelings to the person they meet for the first time. So you could say that they’re extremely private types.

However, they will stand up for themselves when needed and this may not be a nice sight to see. Each and every one of us has a dark side that surfaces every once in a while, especially when we’re being met with certain obstacles in life.

This doesn’t always look pretty but you have to remember that all of us are humans. We’re allowed to feel and reveal our dark side from time to time.

Although INFJs like to help and please people, they can be a handful when faced with different challenges in life. INFJ’s dark side will show itself one way or another because, just like all of us, they’re only human.

We merely don’t get to see it, or any type of their side really. This personality type is a major introvert that only shares their feelings with special people.

If you’re not close to an INFJ, it’s unlikely you’ll see their dark side. Some people even think of them as mysterious because of the way they tend to hide their emotions and private life.

However, just because you don’t see it, it doesn’t mean an INFJ’s dark side isn’t there. Brace yourselves for a discovery!

1. A whirl of emotions

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For an introvert, emotions are among their worst enemies. They’re not really good at expressing themselves, nor do they really feel the need to.

If you ask them, they’re totally fine with keeping things to themselves and not bothering anyone with how they feel.

However, this is what causes trouble most of the time. People are social beings that need to communicate with others in order to express their needs, wants, and wishes.

If you don’t know or don’t want to do this, you’re probably going to be left with some issues. Part of an INFJ’s dark side includes them piling up their emotions and sweeping them under the carpet.

They don’t open up that easily to someone. So unless they have a person to talk to freely, an INFJ will keep everything to themselves.

This isn’t an ideal case scenario because every now or then, the bomb will explode. This personality type will eventually find themselves unable to deal with all of the pressure they’ve put on themselves.

I like to call it the calm before the storm. It’s basically what happens when an INFJ keeps everything to themselves and that dark side has to surface somehow and someday.

2. Setting the bar high

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This personality type can struggle a lot because they tend to set high expectations for both themselves and others.

However, the first case might be the most poisonous for them. One dark side of an INFJ is that they set the bar high for them in every aspect of life.

It’s possible that they sometimes lack experience because of their introverted nature. This can lead to unrealistic expectations that can’t be met all the time.

An INFJ will try to reach for the stars, only to be caught off guard when they trip. As an introvert, they then withdraw even more from the outside world.

This can affect their mental health and others around them. They subconsciously impact those around them because they start to project their expectations on others.

Sometimes, they can have a hard time understanding other people and their needs. Combine that with their high ambitions and effort, and you get a disaster.

An INFJ’s dark side will also show at times of their accomplishments. They will always strive for more and will have a tough time appreciating themselves and what they’ve achieved so far.

This can impact their self-esteem and lower their confidence. Also, people may think that they’re trying to kill the vibe because they’re never happy with what others do for them.

3. Withdrawal

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It goes without saying that people with this personality type are at their most comfortable when they’re alone. I guess it’s how introverts work, right?

However, an INFJ’s dark side comes out every once in a while in terms of withdrawal. At times, they’ll feel the need to get even more private and completely cut out the rest of the world.

This can make them rather isolated from society, so much so that they lose track of their surroundings. As we mentioned before, they live in their own bubble and would hate it if someone was to burst it.

Still, this is something that can drag them down, especially if they’re withdrawing for a reason. An introvert doesn’t deal with things as easily as an extrovert does.

They don’t go running to their friends and family to tell them everything that’s happened. INFJs don’t go around showing their raw emotions moments after an event occurs.

Instead, they bury themselves in work or a hobby they really enjoy. This can be fun, but only for a short period of time.

Sometimes they’re like those old, giant turtles that hide away in their shells where no one can get to them. This dark side can affect an INFJ in many ways and often aren’t even aware of it.

They’re simply used to being alone. It’s one of their coping mechanisms – maybe the only one they have.

4. Tough love

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We all need some tough love from time to time, but INFJs have a tendency to overdo it. This personality type tends to be overly harsh on themselves.

They don’t really exclude others either. They will bare their teeth at someone when they believe it’s needed. Although they don’t like confrontation, they can stick up for themselves.

They use this fierceness in many situations as well. Their dark side includes tough love that most resembles an INFJ’s feistiness.

So when you feel like you should be getting encouraged by them, you only get mean words. What can really annoy people is that they use any excuse for that behavior.

Most of the time, they’ll tell you how they’re just being brutally honest. Actually, they can come off as quite rude when they’re in this mood.

The withdrawal can also contribute to how they treat other people. INFJs can get carried away in their thoughts and forget that others have feelings too.

Most of all, an INFJ’s dark side will impact themselves. The person who receives the toughest love from INFJ is themselves.

They are super self-critical and overdo the tough love bit to the point where it becomes an ongoing internal fight. An INFJ can lose their number one supporter this way – themselves.

In conclusion

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An INFJ personality type is one of the introverted Myers-Briggs personality types. They deal with issues and go through hardships quietly.

However, this doesn’t mean that they don’t have a dark side to them. An INFJ will go through turmoils in different stages of life, it’s just that they choose to do it far from the eyes of the public.

They tend to be a bit hard on themselves when tough times strike them. It’s just that they’re used to keeping things for themselves and they learned how to cope that way.

Just because you don’t see something, it doesn’t mean it’s not happening or that it’s not there. Every one of us has some kind of a struggle going on that we’re fighting the best we can.

Therefore, make sure that you don’t only see the dark side of an INFJ personality type. Instead, try and look for the good in everyone.

Last but not least, remember that we’re all human. It’s okay to make mistakes and it’s okay to unleash our dark side from time to time.

Exploring The Dark Side Of INFJ: 4 Things That May Surprise You 9