“A married man dumped me, will he come back?”
So, the inevitable has happened to you. After all these years of being single by choice, you met this awesome man and everything was going great until you found out that he was married.
Even though you promised yourself that you wouldn’t do that to another woman ever, you continued with your flirting because, honestly speaking, you enjoyed all the attention he was giving you.
He gave you endless promises of how he’ll leave his wife for you and how you are his soulmate. He told you that his relationship with his wife is falling apart and that the only thing that makes him happy is seeing you again.
So, you trusted his words and half-truths, even though your gut was telling you to back off and run for the hills. The two of you share a lot of things in common and your feelings couldn’t be easily avoided.
But despite him telling you over and over again that he’ll divorce his wife and plan a future with you, the “unthinkable” happened. This married man dumped you instead.
How did such a beautiful relationship end with you crying yourself to sleep every night and fighting this never-ending pain of heartbreak? You hate him for dumping you, but at the same time, you can’t get him out of your head.
You know you’re sabotaging yourself by thinking about him, but the passion you feel for him is stronger than anything you felt before.
Feelings of emptiness and loneliness consume you. You start questioning whether he ever thought you were the right one or perhaps he was just looking for some fun outside of his marriage.
And above all, you think how stupid you were to let this happen to your own soul and heart.
Why a married man who dumped you may come back
Even though you know a relationship with a married man is almost impossible to turn into a real one, you secretly hope that he’ll divorce his wife and come back to you.
But why do married men come back to their “other woman” after they dumped her?
1. He’s dissatisfied with his marriage
First questions first: If a married man dumps his lover, will he come back?
The answer to this question is rather simple. Yes, he will, if he’s dissatisfied with his marriage.
And really, you don’t have to be a genius to figure this one out. When a married man is unhappy in his own marriage, then he’ll seek his happiness elsewhere.
That’s one of the main reasons a married man develops certain feelings for another woman outside of his relationship.
Perhaps he feels like his wife is controlling him all the time. And in order to avoid having to deal with her over and over again, he’ll start looking for a way to escape that situation.
Maybe he and his wife haven’t addressed the problem and that’s why he came to you in the first place. Or it could be that his wife was neglecting him emotionally, which eventually led him to feel empty and disappointed in love.
Subconsciously, he came up with a plan to fill that emotional void somewhere else. Eventually, he found it by spending more time with you than with his wife.
However, reaching the point where you decided you’re going to cheat on your partner can be an incredibly difficult and desperate path – one that more and more people are taking lately.
The dissatisfaction that those couples face in their marriage drives them away from each other. So, to not feel empty again, they travel down this path and decide to be unfaithful to their significant other.
It’s perfectly fine to admit to yourself that you have needs. Everyone has them. And those needs should be satisfied. I couldn’t agree more on that.
But the thing is, your significant other should be the one to satisfy those needs. You shouldn’t be looking elsewhere.
2. You’re the only one who triggers his hero instinct
If you’re unfamiliar with the term “hero instinct,” don’t worry, you’re not the only one. It’s a rather new concept in relationship psychology that not many women know about.
Essentially, it has to do with a man’s aspiration to step up and take care of the woman who is close to his heart.
His natural desire is to provide for her, protect her, and be the person she always turns to whenever and wherever she needs help.
If you thought that men were complicated, think again. They’re not actually, they’re just misunderstood.
Instincts are drivers of human behaviors and that’s especially true for a man when deciding whether or not he wants to be in a relationship with you.
So one potential reason a married man may come back to you could be that his wife doesn’t trigger his hero instinct. Perhaps she isn’t giving him a chance to prove himself, so that’s why he’s resorted to being unfaithful to her.
And he’s probably finding it all with you. A man won’t be feeling happy and satisfied in a relationship if he’s not getting what he needs from it.
3. He’s feeling resentment toward his wife
Perhaps his wife cheated on him. Or maybe his significant other likes to flirt with other men whenever she gets the chance.
As a consequence, maybe he wants to get his revenge by being with you again.
Or it could be that his wife cheated on him years ago, and even though they found a common ground and moved on, he still feels inferior to his wife because of the pain she caused him.
Whatever the root of his resentment toward her might be, it gives him the sense that he lost the control he once had and wants to even the score.
4. He’s looking for excitement
When your entire life revolves around keeping a job and being married, eventually things turn into a routine. And many people don’t like to be stuck in one.
If he’s becoming frustrated with his everyday life and needs something that will bring him excitement and make his blood pump faster, then striking up an affair with you again could help him achieve that.
Or perhaps he’s the type of man who loves to live in the moment and doesn’t think about the possible consequences of his actions. Maybe he doesn’t consider having feelings for another woman as anything bad at all.
Even if you think that him being with you is a sign of dissatisfaction in his marriage, it may not be the case at all.
He may have dumped you and now wants to come back because he misses the excitement that comes with having an affair.
Signs he will come back after dumping you
Now that you’re familiar with the possible reasons he might come back into your life, you must be wondering if there any signs he will actually do it. Well, luckily for you, there are and I’ll list a couple of them to help you figure it out.
1. He compliments you out of the blue
Women are similar to flowers, you know. The more attention you give them, the more beautiful and happy they are. And all women love compliments.
So, if a married man says that you have a beautiful smile and that he can’t get enough of looking at you every day, then you can be certain that he’s interested in you and that he’ll come back.
That’s especially true if you have the chance to see each other every day. Perhaps he’s your coworker or you both move in the same circles.
Either way, if you notice him showering you with compliments, then you can expect him to call and ask you to hang out with him again.
But his compliments won’t be regular ones that you usually get from another man. In the beginning, they’ll be harmless. However, a married man will be more direct as time passes. That’s an obvious sign he will come back to you.
He’s doing that so that you notice him in the sea of men.
The thing is, men aren’t very good with words. They don’t necessarily give compliments to other women unless they do it with a purpose.
To find out whether a married man will come back to you or not, you have to pay close attention to your social media profiles.
Does it seem to you that more and more fake profiles have been following you recently? Have you considered that he created them so he can stalk on you?
If you can relate to this, then it could be a sign your married man will come back. Perhaps he’s constantly hitting like on your every post and follows your every move on social media.
He’s doing this because he obviously misses you a lot. Frankly speaking, he’s obsessed with you.
If he’s operating under a fake profile, he’ll comment on your pictures freely without being afraid that his wife might catch him.
The point is, if he stalks you on social media, then don’t be surprised if he calls you out of the blue and asks you out.
3. He takes out time especially for you
If this married man dumped you, and you’re still wondering if he will come back, then take a closer look at how much time he spends with you.
It’s natural for a married man to give his wife and family as much time as he can. But this is no ordinary situation, is it?
That’s why if he’s taking out time especially for you during the weekends and even on weekdays, then you can be sure that he’s thinking about coming back to you.
You see, he’ll do anything he can to spend more time with you and that even includes giving up on his boys nights.
If you’re a little under the weather, he may get soup for you to help you feel better. It’s obvious that his feelings for you are serious and that he probably wants to get back with you.
4. He stays in touch with you
A married man who wants to come back to you will try to stay in touch with you regularly. Whether it be calling or texting, the only thing that’s important to him is to speak with you again. And he’ll expect you to reply too.
He does this because he wants you to feel his presence in your life again. He’s eager to find out what you’ve been doing when you’re out of his sight.
And when he’s on a seminar or business trip, he’ll send you flowers, cakes, or chocolate just to tell you he’s missing you.
He’ll go out of his way to make sure his presence is felt in your life. This is an obvious sign he will come back.
5. You have a strong gut feeling that he will come back
Deep down in your heart, you have this strong gut feeling that this man will come back to you. And while you’re afraid to admit it, the reality is that most men come back eventually.
The only thing is you should never stand between a married man and his wife.
Even though you had the time of your life with him, the fact remains that this man dumped you. And even if he wants to come back, you should never accept to be someone’s second choice.
How to get over being dumped by a married man?
The worst thing that you can do to yourself right now is to lock yourself in a room, crying and waiting for him to come back. In reality, you should wipe those tears away, grab some ice cream if you need to, and pull your shoulders up.
Don’t ever settle for a man who only calls you when it suits him. Also, you should never be the third wheel in anyone’s relationship – if that’s the case, go search for your own happiness elsewhere.
And to help you with that, I’ll list some tips that you can follow to get over a married man who dumped you.
1. Give yourself a reality check
I know you’re reading this because you’re asking if a married man who dumped you will come back, but you should rather come out of the world of extramarital affairs and see the situation for what it is.
Do a reality check!
You shouldn’t have fallen in love with a married man in the first place. Think about all the stuff you had to do so the two of you wouldn’t be caught by his wife.
Even though there are cases when the married man leaves his wife for the other woman, it’s something that rarely happens.
Think about your life and what it has become. You didn’t find your true happiness, you were just blinded by love. You don’t want to claim your right on someone who’s got a woman waiting for him at home, am I right?
And if you’re a visual person, try to write in a notebook all the pros and cons. It can help to see the situation from a different perspective.
2. Don’t feel sorry for loving him
To move forward with your life, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself and guilty for having feelings for a married man. The reality is we can’t choose who we’re going to love or hate. It’s our heart who makes that decision.
So, instead of feeling miserable about yourself, quit beating yourself up about the fact that it didn’t work out.
I understand that a married man dumped you and that you’re wondering will he come back, but remember that everyone makes mistakes in life.
So if you want to emotionally heal from him dumping you, you have to stop torturing yourself.
3. Get rid of the memorabilia
You know those gifts he gave you while he was telling you how much he loves and cares about you? Well, the next step in getting over a heartbreak is throwing out all those memories that keep reminding you of him.
If you want to start a new chapter, you’ve got to finish the previous one.
4. Look for the void
In most cases when women get into relationships with a married man, it’s because they feel the need to fill some void. And in order to get over a married man who dumped you, you need to identify that particular void.
Perhaps you were craving some human affection? Or love? Or maybe you need to feel the pain of being the other woman to fill that emptiness?
Whatever the case may be, you know that it won’t do you any good in the long run. And now that you’re alone with your own thoughts, you have a chance to identify that void and fill it with something right and healthy.
5. Talk to someone if you need to
Losing someone who meant a lot to you can really bring you down. And coping with that loss is especially difficult if you aren’t strong enough to deal with it on your own.
So, after a married man dumped you, you can always turn to your friends or family and try to talk to them about the entire situation. Perhaps all you need is an objective opinion to get back up on your feet in no time.
And if you don’t feel like talking to them right now about the married man who dumped you, then just plan a girl’s night out and have fun.
If neither of those two options is your cup of tea, then embrace your emotions and pour your heart out in a journal. Or consider seeing a therapist – there’s absolutely no shame in seeking emotional help from a professional.
6. Think about what you’re not getting from this relationship
Each of us has certain expectations when we’re in a relationship. And the right path to healing your broken heart is to evaluate your needs that your married man isn’t able to satisfy.
Grab a pen and paper and jot down what sacrifices you’re making, when you don’t need to. Ask yourself if you would still make those compromises should you be dating a single man?
Most times, a married man will only call you when it suits him. Usually, he doesn’t even care about your emotions and needs.
You have to prioritize yourself and your needs, if you ever want to be genuinely happy with yourself.
7. Date other, single man
Take as much time as you need for your broken heart to heal again. Then once it does, and if you feel like you’re ready to enter the dating scene, then go out and meet new, single men.
Be cautious not to fall into the trap of starting a new relationship with another married man.
When you finally meet those single men, you’ll see the difference for yourself to have a man you don’t have to hide or keep secrets with.
Remember, everyone is destined to meet their other half. So exercise a little patience and wait for the right guy to sweep you off your feet.
8. Cut all ties with him
You need to be strong if you really want to get over that married man who dumped you. That includes cutting off all ties with him right here, right now.
It takes a lot of courage and strength to do it, but you have to. You owe it to yourself.
Delete his phone number and block him on your social media profiles. Tell him to never contact you again. Threaten him that you’ll tell his wife if he ever calls you again.
Your well-being and mental health should be your number-one priority. And remember, you don’t need a man to make you happy. You only need yourself.