Why Do Guys Stop Putting In Effort Once They Win Your Heart?

Relationship effort
By Ashley Knight
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When you first met him, he seemed like the perfect guy.

He would romance you and make you feel special. You thought that this just might be the one. He was everything you ever wanted in a man and more.

After you have gotten into the relationship, she changed drastically.

He had turned from the wonderful man that you fell in love with to a lazy boyfriend who can’t seem to put effort into your relationship.

You are not the only one who experiences this. You have probably had many of your female friends complain about this issue as well!

So, why do guys stop putting effort into your relationship once they have obtained your heart?

1.He met someone else

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Let’s just get the obvious out of the way – if he stopped putting effort into your relationship he might have already met someone else.

All of his time and energy is going into them, so there isn’t much left for you.

You shouldn’t be paranoid, of course not, there are many other reasons why guys stop putting in the effort.

There are signs you can look for if your boyfriend is cheating on you or you can straight up confront him about it.

If he’s going to play it cool while you’re here losing your mind, then the least he can do is tell you the truth.

2. He loves the chase

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Some men simply love the chase more than the actual relationship. He loves flirting and making you feel special.

Men like this love to be the center of your attention and be able to wipe away all the competition around him.

He wants to feel like he did a race and got the main reward.

However, when the chase is over he feels unfulfilled. It seemed too easy no matter how much you played hard to get.

He simply wants to flirt and chase a woman.

Relationships aren’t his thing and he is just now figuring it out.

3. He has commitment issues

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Another quite often reason, why men stop putting effort into a new relationship after they have obtained your heart, is because they have commitment issues.

Commitment issues can arise when someone experiences something in their past that just makes them scared to commit to just one person.

You shouldn’t take this one personal, because it’s really not you, but he simply doesn’t know how to be in a committed, loving, relationship.

Things got too real for him after he has won you over and how he’s scared. How does he cope with his fear?

By ignoring you and treating you the way he does. It’s not healthy, I know.

4. He lost interest

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You probably want to hear this one the least, but what if he just lost interest?

This is a very common reason why guys stop putting in the effort needed to continue your relationship.

He might have liked you and saw the potential, but he simply lost interest.

This doesn’t have to do with anything about you. He simply had expectations that weren’t met and he lost interest.

This can also be tied to him just loving the chase more than he loves you. It’s hard to hear it, but it can be the truth.

5. He takes you for granted

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Another reason we see often is that men take women for granted. He has won you over and is now absolutely sure that he won’t have to do anything else.

He firmly believes that you can’t do better than him, so he takes you for granted.

However, putting effort into a relationship isn’t something that you can just stop doing at one point and say that it’s fine.

He believes that you will stay by his side no matter what, so he simply stopped caring (for the lack of better words).

You’re the one now who’s constantly planning dates, you’re the one who initiates dinners and any type of physical contact.

6. He’s playing games with you

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I know we don’t want to give men too much credit here, but one of his reasons for not putting effort into your relationship is because he’s playing games.

He’s playing hot and cold to see your reaction.

He gives you moments of pure joy. He gives you gifts and showers you with attention, everything to make you feel beautiful and loved.

However, most of the time he’s absent and doesn’t seem to remember you exist at all. He might even call you annoying for wanting attention.

On the other hand, he chooses to ignore the fact that he was the one who spoiled you with all of his time and affection.

What are you supposed to do now? Settle for less than that?

7. You’re ‘too much’ for him

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Men get scared when they meet a strong and independent woman. I’m just saying it how it is.

He thought that you were amazing and intriguing so he was shooting his shot, hoping to land a date with you.

When he realized that you two were actually in a relationship, it was too late.

Now you’re stuck with an insecure man who doesn’t know how to handle a strong woman.

He calls you high maintenance, spoiled, or even too opinionated.

On the other hand, he forgot that those things are exactly what made him attracted to you.

He wanted you to tell him everything about anything in your life, now he doesn’t seem to bat an eye.

Never settle for less than you deserve!

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This just has to be said. If a man decides that at one point he’s going to stop putting in effort, your job is to remind him of how you deserve to be treated.

If he still doesn’t get the memo, then leave.

You deserve better than an insecure player who thinks that he’s better than you just because he can play games like a little child.

You never were and never will be obligated to stay with a man who doesn’t see your worth, or doesn’t appreciate having you in his life.

Instead of that, make sure that you know your own worth and never settle for less than you deserve.

You are not ‘too much’, you are not any of the things he calls you when he doesn’t want to put effort into being with you. You are more than enough.

If he’s not able to see what he’s missing if he walks out of your life, that is his loss.

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