I stopped chasing her, now she wants me. My friend told me that, and you will soon find out what happened.
Girls want guys to chase them, but sometimes it’s better to stop chasing her.
We are about to discuss when to stop chasing a woman and why, but that’s not all.
You will get to find out about the effective ways to make her chase you instead.
Why do you need to stop chasing her? If you are chasing a woman who isn’t interested in you, you should definitely stop.
Let me ask you something that will help you understand why you shouldn’t keep chasing her if she’s not interested.
Think for a second about all the things you got and didn’t have to work for. It could be a simple Christmas gift your parents gave you…
Maybe it’s a woman who was crazy about you without you having to try to win her over.
Maybe you valued that gift or that woman, but for how long? My guess is that you didn’t value the things you didn’t have to work for, at least not for long.
It’s simply how our brains are wired. We always value the things we have to work for much more than those we don’t have to do anything for.
When putting in minimal effort is enough to get something, we most often end up taking it for granted.
What does this have to do with why you need to stop chasing a woman who can’t value you?
Let’s think of a certain scenario. You met a girl, and the two of you have known each other for quite a short time.
Still, you try your best to please her in every possible way.
Let’s say you go the extra mile for her and do everything you can to make her happy.
You drive for hours just to see her, and you take her to expensive restaurants, from the first time you went on a date.
What’s more, you tell her every day that she’s beautiful. You also make sure that she knows that you can’t imagine your future without her.
What do you think would be going on in her mind?
Here are just a few things she could be thinking if you act that way:
1. He is very desperate and needy
A woman says that she wants to be with a man who’ll make her the center of his world, but is it really true?
When your whole life revolves around a particular girl, do you think that she likes that?
Of course, some would appreciate the effort, but some would feel pressured and step back.
She could be thinking that you’re very desperate and needy if you keep chasing her.
2. He doesn’t have many options, since he is so attached to me without me even trying to get him to commit
No one wants to be with a person who’s with you only because they can’t find someone else.
When she doesn’t have to do anything, and you chase her, she could think that you can’t be with anyone else.
Women aren’t attracted to men who make them feel like dating those men is the same as donating to charity.
After all, you don’t want the person you care about to be with you only because they feel sorry for you.
3. He seems like those weirdos who used to chase me even though I wasn’t interested
The sad truth is, if she isn’t interested in you, she will only think that you’re weird if you keep chasing her.
Sometimes, chasing a woman could get her to love you, but she has to be interested to begin with.
If not, you are only going to seem like a stalker and push her away even further.
Just think about how you would feel if someone you didn’t like chased you.
If you stop chasing her, she could want you back. What happens then?
A lot of times, when a man stops chasing a woman, she wants to get that man’s attention back.
What can you do if that happens to you? If she wants you now that you’ve stopped chasing her, it’s important that you think rationally.
At the moment, you probably miss her and want her back. No matter how true that is, you have to stop and think about your own happiness.
If you always need to play games with that girl, who wants you to chase her to win her back, ask yourself whether it is really worth it.
She could be the type who wants a man once he stops chasing her, and that means something.
It means that she is probably also the type who needs constant validation and attention from other guys.
If you don’t have anything else going on in your life and you are willing to spend your entire time with her, maybe you should give her a chance.
Otherwise, she will only give you headaches, and it’s simply not worth it.
My friend made that mistake with his first girlfriend. After he stopped all contact her with, she wanted to get back together.
“I stopped chasing her, now she wants me”, he told me. He was still feeling miserable and lonely when that happened, so he took her back.
Everything was okay at first, but soon, the same problems that got them to break up started to appear again.
He wasn’t brave enough to end the relationship then so he ended up wasting his time and stayed with her for another year.
During that time, he could have found someone better for him, but he was stuck in a dead-end relationship.
I’m telling you all this because you really need to think things through instead of rushing into it.
Think about whether you can really have a future with that girl.
When do you need to stop chasing her? You’re not going to like the answer to that question, but it is that you shouldn’t have chased her to begin with.
It’s okay to want a woman, but chasing her when she doesn’t feel the same way about you is a whole other thing.
When you chase a girl who doesn’t like you back, it just shows your needy side and repels women away from you.
Make it a rule never to chase a woman who isn’t as interested in you as you are in her.
To better explain the point I’m making, let me give you a potential scenario.
You had plans to go on a date with this girl, but she canceled at the last minute. There are two possible ways you could react to that.
1. You keep chasing her
Standing up for yourself is important, but if you don’t do that, you keep chasing her. Maybe you tell her that you really want to see her.
You then point out that you’ll be waiting for her to be available again so you can see her.
Maybe you even explain that you have no problem with waiting because you just want to get to see her.
2. You show her that you can walk away
You could tell her that she doesn’t seem to be very eager to see you.
After that, you point out that it’s fine if she doesn’t want to be in a committed relationship like you do.
You show her that you have no problem walking away if that’s the case. This is a very effective way to make her chase you instead.
To better understand when you have to stop chasing her, these are the situations where you have to give up on her:
1. She starts avoiding you.
2. You show her that you’re interested, but she just ignores you.
3. She acts differently around you than around her friends.
4. Your friends let you know that you need to give up on her.
5. She doesn’t respond to your messages or calls anymore.
6. You have problems with your self-esteem because of it.
7. She tells you to stop chasing her.
8. You start thinking that you’re losing your mind because of it.
9. She tells you that you’re going too fast for her or coming on too strong.
10. You notice that she is angry at you, irritated with you, or bothered by you.
11. She tells you about another man she likes.
12. You start wondering if you need to stop chasing her (which means that you probably do need to stop).
But what if she doesn’t chase you?
You stopped all communication with her, and you expect her to want you back, but you don’t hear from her anymore. What happened?
Aren’t girls supposed to want you when you stop chasing them?
You have to realize something, and that is that not every woman will chase you when you stop chasing her.
Some women won’t chase you because they have better options. Others won’t chase you because they have a lot of other things going on in their lives.
When you stop chasing a girl, you have to accept that she’ll maybe just move on and forget about you.
I’m telling you this because you should never stop chasing a girl just to get her back.
Instead, you should simply value your time and yourself too much to keep wasting a lot of time on a person who doesn’t reciprocate your feelings.
If you can’t get her to want you by giving up on chasing her, what can you do?
Well, who says that men have to be the ones to do the chasing in the first place?
You can make her chase you, and it’s always a better option. How can you get a girl to chase you? Just try some of these things:
1. Make her jealous
Show this girl that you have plenty of other options. Have conversations with other women and let her see that other attractive girls want to be with you.
Jealousy is a very strong emotion, and you can make a girl chase you by making her jealous.
A lot of girls would even date a guy who is not really their type just because other attractive women are into him.
Women always have a need to prove to other girls that they are more desirable. Every one of them wants to be the most attractive.
A girl is going to see you differently when she sees you around other attractive girls, and it will increase your value.
However, you have to keep in mind that this could backfire if a girl doesn’t have a lot of confidence.
A girl who isn’t that confident will think that a guy who is around attractive girls is out of her league.
She won’t believe that she will be good enough for you if she sees that other attractive women want to be with you.
2. Don’t put her first
You shouldn’t make a girl the center of your world. Don’t constantly give her all of your attention.
If you do, she will be aware that she has won you over completely, and it will make her lose interest very quickly.
For instance, if you are having a conversation with a certain woman for the first time, and your friend shows up, don’t just ignore him.
If you are entirely focused on her, and you ignore the friend who appeared while you were talking, what is that telling her?
You are basically showing her that you desperately need female attention.
However, don’t think that the point of this is that you should choose to purposely ignore attractive women.
Of course, you should talk to girls and be engaged in conversations with them, but don’t put any girl on a pedestal.
3. Speak your mind
When you talk to women, you need to speak your mind.
Most guys filter the things they say when having a conversation with an attractive girl.
They do this because they are trying to avoid offending her in any way.
However, you should know that acting that way could make her categorize you together with all the other men around her… and she won’t see your value.
Therefore, you should always be brave enough to speak your mind.
Be unapologetic when you express yourself instead of trying to be the person you think she would fall for.
You will see that women will chase you a lot more if you freely speak your mind with them.
4. Don’t always accommodate her schedule
You need to value yourself first.
For instance, let’s imagine a situation where you want to arrange a date with some girl.
Do you know what most guys do? They do everything they can to accommodate the woman’s schedule first.
You need to do something completely different from that. Let her know which days you’re available.
Ask about the girl’s schedule, but only after you’ve told her about yours.
It will show her that you have other things going on in your life and that she is not your only priority.
Don’t forget that a woman isn’t attracted to a man whose whole world revolves around her.
She needs to see that you have a purposeful life, and she will see you as an attractive man. That will make her chase you.
5. Have a high status
This is the most powerful way to make a girl chase you, as long as you apply it correctly. It doesn’t work in all situations, but status is a very powerful thing.
As long as a man has a high status, he can get a girl excited simply by initiating a conversation.
How can you appear as a person who has a high status around girls? One way is to talk to them somewhere where you’re an authority.
She will see you as a person with a high status if you are teaching her something (dance, yoga, lifting…).
The same thing goes if you’re the person who is most respected in that environment.
Your behavior can also demonstrate your status. Think about how people with a high status carry themselves.
You can think about some famous celebrities or even the president.
These people talk with conviction and walk with purpose. When they look at you, they make unwavering eye contact.
Throughout history, men have often lied to girls about the status they have as a way to attract them.
The result of that is that girls have learned to pick up those subtle behavior cues that show if a man is truly the real deal he’s pretending he is.
I’m telling you this because you need to think more about the way you carry yourself than about what you are going to say to a woman.
Most girls will make judgments when they see you before you even say a word.
If the way you walk around looks like you have been living in your mother’s basement your entire life, she isn’t going to be attracted to you.
This means that you won’t even get a chance to have a conversation with her.
Therefore, you should always appear like you have a high status when talking to a girl, and it will make her chase you.
Hopefully, all this has helped you realize why and when you shouldn’t chase a woman, and how you can make girls chase you.
However, if you still want to chase her, there’s a way to do so without coming off as desperate, weird, or needy.
You first need to understand that it takes time for a relationship to develop. Forcing your way into a person’s life is never a good idea.
Here is how you can chase her appropriately:
1. Just be her friend
You need some time to get to know that girl. More importantly, she needs time to learn more about you.
You deserve to be with someone who is just as interested in you as you are in them.
This is why you shouldn’t rush into a relationship but seek to be just friends at first.
2. Don’t behave like your happiness depends on the girl realizing that you are an amazing person
That’s too much pressure for a girl to take. All women want to be with a man who is confident and happy on his own.
Don’t let your happiness depend on a girl’s realization that you are a great guy.
3. Show her respect
Most women actually love when men chase them or see them as special. They often appreciate a man’s confidence and persistence.
However, they all want to be valued and respected, more than anything else. Show her respect when you chase her, and it will work in your favor.
4. Stop chasing her
You can find out whether she’s really into you if you stop chasing her. If she likes you, she will probably want to find out what changed.
She could even become more interested than she was in the first place because you aren’t trying too hard.
However, you could see that she doesn’t even care that you’re not pursuing her anymore.
That just shows that you’ve been chasing the wrong woman. It’s best that you give up on her and only be friends for now.
5. Be relaxed
When you are chasing a girl, it’s important that you stay relaxed. Don’t behave like your happiness depends on her agreeing to be with you.
You should never forget that there are a lot of girls out there, and some of them will think that you are attractive and worth chasing.
6. Don’t change
You should never pretend to be someone you’re not just so you could be with the girl you like.
Not only is that exhausting, but it doesn’t lead to a healthy relationship.
You should be with a girl who likes you for you, someone you can be yourself with. Set some boundaries and don’t let your happiness depend on her.
Don’t let any woman make you wonder whether you’re good enough. You shouldn’t think that you have to change to be with her.
After all, why would you even want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t like you the way you are?
Keep in mind that when a girl likes you, chasing her is worth it, but if she doesn’t, there’s another one who will.