Think aloud
How do guys feel when you cut them off? Are they hurt by the fact that you no longer want to communicate with them? Or do they become more motivated to go after you?
When a relationship ends, whether it be an almost relationship or a complicated one, you may end up wondering how the guy feels when you cut him off.
I honestly believe that this is a natural human desire. It’s never easy to just move on and not ever look back after spending so much time with that person. If anything, you’re going to think about how your decision has affected them.
It really doesn’t matter what they’ve done to you or how much this particular guy hurt you, you’ll still think about the good memories you two had. Or perhaps there were so many good moments that you can’t even bring yourself to be upset with him.
You feel as if a piece of yourself is now gone. His absence makes you question your own sanity and it’s mentally torturing you. But you know that your happiness isn’t with him and you can’t and shouldn’t want your ex back.
That’s exactly why you want to know what guys feel, if anything, after you cut them off. You want to know that you leaving him has left a mark on his heart and that it wasn’t all for nothing.
You think that you wouldn’t survive if you saw that he’s living his best life now that you’re not in a relationship anymore. So, you’ve decided to seek answers online, trying to make sense of something that’s brought you so much pain.
How do guys feel when you cut them off?
It’s much easier to notice how a woman feels after being cut off than a man because women are great at accepting and expressing their emotions. Many men, on the other hand, tend to ignore any sort of emotion they could possibly feel about a woman and will try to suppress them forever if they can.
But some men don’t have the strength to put those feelings aside and pretend as if nothing ever happened. Instead, they deal with them in a mature way and hope that it won’t affect them in their next relationship.
1. They feel insecure about themselves
One of the perks of being in a relationship is that you’ll feel good about yourself because you have someone who loves you for who you are. Your self-esteem and ego are through the roof and you never seem to question your worth.
But all of that confidence and security suddenly disappears when you no longer have a partner by your side. Your insecurity kicks in and you wonder whether you’ll ever be good enough for anyone.
And that’s exactly what happens for a guy when you cut him off and decide to ignore him. His ego is hurt and he tries to find a way to justify his emotions. All that he thinks of is why you don’t like him the same way he likes you.
He looks at himself and doesn’t see a man anymore. He begins to question his manhood and if he’s attractive at all. Suddenly, he shows his true face and you see that he isn’t the man you thought he was.
The truth is, men aren’t that different from women when they’re being ignored by someone who means a lot to them. A guy will also wonder what others have that he doesn’t and he’ll look for ways to improve in order to attract you back.
His feelings (if he had any) will still be there even if you no longer talk to each other. Don’t think that he’ll instantly forget about you if he really cared. Many men will lie, saying they’ve moved on, but that’s not true at all.
Men just like women have emotions and they’ll have to deal with them first before they consider finding someone new. It’s just a matter of time before reality hits them.
2. They fear rejection
Nothing hurts more than being rejected by the person you thought would always be there for you. You go through a roller coaster of emotions and it seems as if you’ll never recover from it.
Perhaps your choice to cut him off came after he did something that hurt you, but he wasn’t aware of it at all. In that case, he’ll be completely devastated that you abruptly ended things between you two.
But you never know how a person will react to rejection. Some guys opt for going out every night with their friends, hoping to drown their real emotions and never having to deal with them. They’ll do whatever they can to avoid facing the truth.
Others, on the other hand, might take it as a sign that you’re playing hard to get and chase you even harder. That’s the thing with men and rejection. They don’t know how to behave when a woman leaves first.
Usually, they think they’re the ones who have the right to walk away, but it’s far from that. And now that this happened to your guy, he feels lost and will likely try to find a way to get you back.
3. They are intrigued
If you wish to turn the tables around and not chase after a guy, then simply cut him off. That way you’ll prove to him that you can live without him and don’t need him to be happy.
That will trigger the hero instinct in him and he’ll be driven to win you over again. This is something that most dating experts will tell you not to do because you’re basically playing mind games with him.
But, perhaps you want to teach him a lesson and nothing else. And by cutting him off, his curiosity for you will increase significantly.
Men are very persistent when they know what they want. They aren’t afraid to go all-in to achieve their goal. And now that you piqued his curiosity, he’ll search for a way to get your attention back.
He’ll be all over you to see whether or not your feelings for him have truly faded away. He’ll be testing the waters by calling you out of the blue or “accidentally” bumping into you at your favorite restaurant.
4. They are motivated
Some guys feel even more motivated to go after you once you cut them off and show disinterest.
Perhaps you’ve been in an almost relationship and you were looking for a way to give him the much-needed push to just go for it and make the first move. In that case, applying the no contact rule will prove to be the best decision you’ll ever make, since the guy will be all over you in a heartbeat.
Truth be told, many guys can’t accept the fact that a girl doesn’t want them. They think every woman will like them and are confident that they can hold you in the palm of their hand. So, when they meet an out-of-the-ordinary woman who cuts them off the instant she sees he’s playing games with her, that’s when everything changes.
His motivation to chase after you increases and he won’t stop until he gets a positive answer from you. He’ll do anything in his power to see that he has your attention and not some other guy.
This can be pretty annoying if you only wanted to get rid of him because he’ll probably bug you with tons of messages and calls. He may even show up to your workplace and surprise you with lunch even though you explicitly said that you didn’t want to hear from him ever again.
5. They’re entertained by your decision
Some guys are pretty immature and don’t think you’re serious with your decision. Instead, they’re entertained by the fact that you have cut them out of your life and reckon you’ll come back after a week or two.
Those are usually players who don’t seek any real romantic relationship and believe that you’re only playing games with them. And instead of fighting for you, they play along and cut you off too.
But what they don’t realize is that their actions or words hurt you and that you were serious when you said that you don’t want them to contact you anymore. Those guys will never grow up. They’ll only jump from one relationship to the next.
And even if he tries to chase after you, it won’t be too long before he gets bored and moves on to his next target.
These types of guys don’t deserve you. You won’t have a bright future with them and it’s for the best that you stick with your decision not to ever reply to his texts or calls.
6. They are hurt
Well, there’s a possibility that the man you dated or were in a relationship with had genuine feelings for you. Now that you decided to cut him off, the guy feels betrayed and hurt by you.
He can’t think of a reason for you to leave him because he saw your relationship as perfect and flawless. But perhaps he couldn’t see all the black holes in the relationship out of his blind love for you.
Maybe you tried to tell him that he has to change and that he needs to be better in order for your relationship to survive, but he simply didn’t listen. Consequently, you had to cut him off because you couldn’t take it anymore.
The truth is, it’ll take him weeks or even months to realize how badly he mistreated you. Perhaps he was only infatuated with you. Whatever the reason might be, his feelings are hurt and he’ll definitely try to find a way to save his heart from being torn to pieces.
It’s not unusual for guys to pretend that they’re not affected by a woman’s decision, so don’t be surprised if he acts as if nothing ever happened.
But it’s only a matter of time before he contacts you and asks you to give him a second chance because he misses you. Your absence showed him how much you mean to him and how much happier he is when you’re a part of his life.
7. They get angry at you
There is also a chance that your ex or almost-boyfriend becomes angry at you for giving him the cold shoulder and cutting him off completely. A guy like that will go mental when he hears that you’ll rather be alone than with him.
If that’s the case, then you better be ready to face the aftermath. He might start to stalk you on social media or in real life to see whether you’ve found someone else. Usually, those types of guys are very possessive and don’t want any other guy to have you.
That’s why you need to make it clear to him that your decision is not based on the fact that you found someone new but because of his behavior toward you. Even if he doesn’t accept it at first, it’s better to say it now than to regret not saying it later on.
Nevertheless, his pain will slowly develop into anger and that adrenaline might even prompt him to try to win you back. You may hear him beg for a second chance and that it’s difficult for him to move on.
But you have to stick to your decision. Don’t hesitate to reject him again.
When is it appropriate to cut a guy off?
There are a couple of situations where cutting a guy off is absolutely okay and necessary to maintain your mental health. However, I get that it’s not that easy to erase someone from your life and forget about the happy moments you two once shared.
But there will be times where your ex or almost-boyfriend reaches out and you simply want to reconnect with him.
In those rare circumstances, you’re not even thinking about starting a new relationship, because this guy is clouding your mind with all sorts of ideas. But it doesn’t matter how amazing he was while you two were together, the fact that you weren’t happy with him gives you the right to cut him off.
And if he did any of these things to you, then he definitely doesn’t deserve a second chance:
1. He gaslighted you
Dealing with a gaslighter can make you feel like you’re going crazy. You don’t trust your emotions anymore and you feel awkward when you finally gain control over your life again.
Being in a relationship with a man like this is exhausting. A gaslighter will try to manipulate every aspect of your life and never take your emotions or opinion into consideration when making a decision.
At least, that’s how I felt when I went through my last breakup. I had to cut the guy off because he made me feel like I was going insane. Every day he sent me messages saying how he deserves a second chance and how I won’t find anyone better.
I saw that he was feeding on my misery and thriving on the knowledge that I was suffering after we broke up. And that’s when I made the decision to cut him off for good.
It took me months to realize what was really happening. He tried to weasel his way into my life again by pressuring me with endless calls and texts. But I had to cut him off for my own sanity’s sake. And I can say that it wasn’t as easy as it sounds, but it was definitely the best decision I’ve ever made.
I know you’re concerned about how guys feel when you cut them off, but you have to prioritize yourself here. You have to do this for yourself. Eventually, you’ll stop caring about him and you’ll be happy again.
2. He left you without even considering your feelings
There are some men who make irrational decisions that lead to breakups, without even being aware of the problems you two had in your relationship.
When you finally do decide to cut him off, he’ll miss you and kick himself because he obviously didn’t think his decision through.
Some guys are just looking for a ticket out of a relationship, so they make problems where there were none. Perhaps he initiated a couple of fights or arguments just so he could break up with you.
This doesn’t mean he didn’t love you in the first place. He might have got scared that things got a bit too serious for him and he was looking for a way out.
But you know what people say: “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” And that’s true in every sense. After you cut him off, he’ll feel a sense of loss.
3. He cheated on you
What if your boyfriend or almost-boyfriend cheated on you? Does he deserve a second chance? Well, if you ask me, this is a no-brainer. If he’s ever been unfaithful to you, then you need to cut him off immediately.
A man like that threw your love and trust away like it was nothing. He was too selfish to actually think about your feelings.
There’s no excuse to ever give a cheater a second chance and even if you do, the chances of reigniting your spark again are slim to none. No matter how much he promises that he’ll change, you deserve someone better than a cheater.
So, if this guy really did cheat on you, then walk away and don’t look back. Don’t worry about how the guy feels when you cut him off.
After a while, you’ll see that he misses you and regrets hurting you in the first place. But in all honesty, good riddance.
4. He abused you in any way
If you experienced any type of abuse from a guy, then you should definitely cut him off for good. Don’t consider getting back together with him because it won’t get better and he won’t change.
The harsh truth is he wants to see you broken and sad. His goal is to destroy your self-esteem and make you feel worthless. But don’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you like that.
Cut him off and he’ll feel insecure about himself. All the things that he has done to you will come back to haunt him. Eventually, he may contact you and ask you to forgive him.
But don’t even think about falling back into his arms. Remember his words and actions that hurt you. Keep in mind that he isn’t the same man that he pretended to be at the beginning.
Whatever you do, don’t do this to yourself again.
How to cut a guy off
The easiest way to cut a guy off is to simply stop every kind of contact you may have with him and apply the no contact rule. Be warned, though, that the first time you receive a message from him, it’ll be difficult to resist the urge to reply.
You’ll feel like giving him one more chance, but you need to control yourself. Hang in there because there’s light at the end of this tunnel. Eventually, you’ll be very happy that you didn’t do it.
Block him on all social media platforms and change your number if you need to. I know that it’s tough for you to move on, but be strong and ignore anything and everything that he may send you.
Trust me, you’re better off without him and you shouldn’t fall for his pathetic little mind games. When you cut him off, he might be intrigued and motivated to get you back, but he won’t have access to you anymore.
You’ll be able to create your own, better future without him. You’ll finally feel free.
