Think aloud
We all know that dating is difficult, but what’s even harder is figuring out whether or not the guy is actually into you at all. Well, if you’ve been wondering how to find out about his feelings for you and make him miss you at the same time, just don’t text him and he will text you back.
The thing about dating is that you have to go through the pre-dating phase before you even know if he’s being serious about you or not. During that period, you’re trying to impress each other and see if you’re actually compatible.
That’s why texting is very important when it comes to finding out whether or not he’s the right one for you.
You might have never thought of it, but you can find out much about a guy by the way he texts you. You can tell whether he’s a gentleman or an abusive psychopath just by reading between the lines when he’s messaging you.
I know you’re doing your best to get his attention, but would you believe me when I say that the best way to shift his focus on you is to not text him at all?
But does it really work when you ignore the guy for a bit? Is it really worth playing those silly mind games for him to notice you?
When should I stop texting him?
To better understand why this technique works (which we’ll get to soon enough), you have to remember that a man’s mind works differently than a woman’s.
They don’t wish to be chased by women but instead want it the other way around.
A guy enjoys the thrill of the chase and finds it quite unappealing when a woman just throws herself at him. Usually, he instantly backs off since he’s turned off when a woman becomes too available.
That’s why if you wish to have his attention, you must resist the urge to text him. Believe me when I say that if you don’t text him, he will text you eventually.
I know why you’re questioning whether or not you should stop texting him. After all, you may have just started dating and you’re quite unsure if this tactic will work for you or just backfire.
But there are a couple of reasons why you don’t need to text him and he will text you back for sure.
1. You’re the one who always sends the first text
Let’s say that you’re an early bird and you like to get up very early and have your cup of coffee without anyone disturbing you. In that case, it’s perfectly fine that you text him first if he’s really into texting with you.
But if you’re the one who always sends the first text, even though he got up way before you and is already active on social media, then you have to consider giving him a taste of his own medicine.
Even if this technique goes against everything that you feel right now about him, think about using a bit of silent treatment.
Show him that he needs to texts first for a change. Give him the opportunity to be the initiator and see where it leads.
He may realize how much he misses talking to you and take matters into his own hands and text you first. On the other hand, it could be that he’s not that interested in you and doesn’t even notice you’re not texting him at all.
Remember, sometimes dating is like a game of chess. You need to carefully plan your next move if you want to reach your goal. Keep that in mind, and it’ll not only save you precious time but keep you from heartbreak.
2. He’s forcing you to text him
Not every man is the same. Some guys like to play hard to get, so instead of texting you, they ignore you completely and put you on hold.
Others just love their egos being stroked, so they make you do the reaching out. And then some men aren’t that interested in dating you at all, it’s simple as that.
Also, there are men who are manipulators in disguise, who try to exploit you over texts.
If your guy is bothering you with messages and calls, and forcing you to text him every minute of the day, just so he knows where you’re at and with whom, run and don’t look back!
Even if you think that he’s a good guy, his only intention is to deceive and manipulate you so that he can use you whenever it suits him. A man like that likes to have everything under his control, including you.
If you’re not careful enough and miss the red flags that he’s a player and a manipulator, then you’ll quickly lose control over your whole life.
Before you even know it, he’ll isolate you from your friends and family to the point where he’s the only person you can turn to.
If you can relate to any of these scenarios, then that’s a good enough reason to stop texting him.
3. He’s already left you on “read”
No matter what you do, you can’t force someone to like you. If he wants to talk to you, then he’ll do it. No matter how busy he is or what he’s doing at the moment, at least he’ll let you know that he’ll talk to you later.
You can’t keep making excuses for him forever, you know.
This is why you should stop texting him if you’ve already sent a couple of messages in a row and received no answer.
And even if something incredible happens to you and you can’t wait to tell him about it, you have to resist the temptation and focus on some other things.
It’s important that he sees you’re not anybody’s second choice, that you’re not there only when he needs to get things off his chest.
I know that it’s tough for you to not listen to your heart, but if you don’t text him, he will text you, trust me.
4. You communicate only through texts
It’s perfectly fine if you want to take things slow and don’t have the desire to go out on a date with him every single night. You don’t have to force yourself to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
That said, your entire communication shouldn’t revolve around texting. If he makes some random excuses every time you suggest you two meet up and do something, then it’s time to step back and reevaluate his intentions with you.
When you think of it, if you really want to meet someone, and if your intentions are right, then you’d want to spend most of your time with them.
But if he’s constantly avoiding you, it could be that he’s keeping you as a secret and doesn’t want anyone to see him with you. Or maybe he has someone else in his life and doesn’t want to confess to you.
It may well be that this guy is just keeping you as his backup plan.
Whatever the case, you deserve none of that and that’s why you should stop texting him.
5. You’re the one doing all the work
Texting and relationships have a couple of similarities. For example, in both cases, people have to put in an equal amount of effort if they want to make it work.
So, if he’s making you carry all the conversation on your own while you’re still dating, imagine how awful it would be to plan your future together with a man like that!
Being in a one-sided relationship is terrible – it’s nearly impossible to get to know each other when you’re the only one doing the talking.
If he’s not showing any interest in chatting with you, then you should make him miss you by not texting him at all. Even if your heart desires him, sometimes it’s better to pull back in order to get his attention.
6. It seems as if he’s disappeared on you
When you haven’t noticed any Twitter updates or received funny videos from him for a while, then maybe you should stop contacting him.
Take that as a very big hint and not give him a call. Why? Because, instead of his familiar voice after the tone, you’ll hear his voice mail.
The point is, don’t hunt him down or text his friends because he’ll only think of you as being needy and clingy.
You have nothing to lose by not texting him
Maybe it’s tough for you to see how not talking to him would be good for you. But if you take a step back and take a closer look, you’ll see that you have everything to gain.
Only then will you know whether or not you truly matter to him. You’ll realize his intentions and interest level.
Whatever you do, never make excuses for the guy. He knows exactly what his next steps should be if he really wants to see you.
If his desire is to ask you out, then all he has to do is to set a date, pick a restaurant, and show up. And all that he can do without your help.
Even shy guys who don’t know how to talk to women know this, so don’t make excuses for any man and feel as if you have to help him out.
Let him lead the conversation. A real man will recognize the opportunity that’s been given to him and use it to prove to his woman how much she means to him.
And if he doesn’t take the lead, then you won’t get invested and be emotionally tied to a man who wasn’t meant for you anyway. Or before you really get to know him and realize that he’s not worth your time or effort.
And what’s the worst thing that can happen? You end up losing a guy who wasn’t interested in you anyway and you move forward with your own life.
This is what happens when you stop texting him
Now that you know why you should stop texting him, you must be wondering what the benefits are of doing such a thing. I get it, it feels wrong going against your heart, but sometimes you have to listen to your mind first.
And even though a few men love to be chased, most really do prefer chasing.
1. He’s suddenly available and decides to chase after you
Once you cut off having any kind of contact with him, suddenly he has a bunch of free time in his schedule for you two to text and even go out on a date.
You see, most times it’s impossible to decipher what’s going on inside a man’s mind. You think that he’ll do anything in his power to spend as much time with you as possible, only to be left hanging and in the dark by him.
If you were the one to always initiate the conversation and plan your dates, that’s exactly what will happen to you.
But once you stop doing it, his life will shift completely and he’ll become aware that he needs to put in more effort if he wants to keep you.
I see many women being disrespected in their relationships, but that only happens if you don’t demand respect from the very beginning.
If you don’t make it an essential, you will never get it. And this doesn’t just apply to romantic relationships.
Show him that you’re not like the other girls he’s met before. Prove to him that you’re valuable and your emotions aren’t toys he can play with. Your feelings and time are as precious as his.
And once he sees that you deserve respect, he’ll give it to you. And if he doesn’t realize that, he’s not worthy of you anyway.
2. He’s eager to find out what happened
When dating, you spend a lot of time thinking about how to spike his interest. You try to play these boring games of hot-and-cold and stuff like that, only to be crushed when you find out that he’s not that into you.
But if you spent most of your time texting and it’s suddenly stopped, it’s only natural for him to wonder what happened and why you stopped texting him.
Whether or not he likes you will become apparent to you at this moment. How?
Well, it’s actually simple. If he’s really into you, then he’ll text you to find out why he’s getting radio silence from you. Or he might be one of the courageous ones and ask you out on a date to talk about it in person.
But the fact remains, your phone will remain silent if he doesn’t plan to make you part of his life.
I understand that it’s hard for you to hear this and it may hurt a little, but keep in mind that if one door closes, another one will open.
3. He reevaluates his opinion of you
The fact that you no longer talk to him will cast doubt over his opinion of you. He’ll start to question his emotions for you and stop looking at you as being clingy or needy – if that was his opinion about you at the beginning.
Simply put, when you don’t text him, you’ll be more appealing to him than you were before.
Your attractiveness level will definitely increase because you’re suddenly unattainable. He won’t think of you as desperate or too available as he’ll see that you have a life besides him.
So, if you’ve been wondering how to be a high-value woman, then try this method and see how his opinion changes about you.
4. He starts missing you and showing interest in your everyday life
A man’s behavior really depends on how you approach him. If you’re too available, he’ll quickly lose interest in you and move on to another girl.
To keep a man’s attention, you have to put in a lot of work and be smart about it. And a great way to achieve that is to not text him, and eventually, he will text you.
When he notices you’ve pulled back and stopped sending him messages first, he’ll suddenly show interest in your everyday life.
He’ll ask you how your day has been or what you’ve been doing lately to keep the conversation going at all costs.
It’s important that you dose your messages and give yourself some time before replying to his texts. Men love to chase women and they hate to lose. And this guy almost lost you because of his dumb behavior.
Maybe he thought that if he played hard to get, you would fall for him even harder, but you saw right through his games and turned it to your advantage.
Once he learns that lesson, he’ll definitely not make the same mistake twice.
5. You have the upper hand again
It feels terrible knowing that the guy you’re really into, is losing or has lost interest in you, doesn’t it?
You’re probably engulfed by negative thoughts and uncertain if he’ll ever ask you on a date with him again.
It feels like you have no control over the situation or your heart and mind. But why?
Well, there are a lot of mixed emotions when you find yourself in a situation like this. And making the decision to stop texting him will certainly take away that uncertainty you’ve been feeling lately.
It’ll be tough to stay away from your phone and not call him for the first couple of days, if you do decide to stop texting him, but soon you’ll start seeing things for what they are.
The realization that you still have to live your life despite him not texting or calling you can be empowering.
And as such, you no longer feel like a hamster on a wheel. You regain some control over the situation.
6. You get the opportunity to reconsider your feelings for him
The number one reason it’s so hard for you to stop texting him is that rejection turns into an obsessive fear.
And with the feelings you have for this guy, it takes it to a whole other level and you start desperately seeking his approval. And in order to get it, you’ll do anything you can to gain his attention.
But in reality, you don’t need to do that. You don’t need anyone to tell you that you’re smart, attractive, and intelligent.
When you think of it, a man who really likes you will see your worth, find you attractive, and appreciate you for all that you are. Isn’t that your idea of a perfect man?
Now that you don’t have to text him every single minute of your day, you can reconsider your feelings for him and not think about the effects of rejection.
7. You fall in love with your own life
The best thing that can happen to you is that you fall in love with yourself and your life.
Once you stop wasting your time on some guy who can’t make up his mind about you, you have all the free time in the world for the things you’ve always wanted to do.
You can go hiking or take cooking classes. You have the time to follow your dreams and passions.
Once he realizes that you’re not to be played with, he’ll start respecting you more. And most women learn this the hard way.
There’s so much more than obsessing over a guy who doesn’t give a damn about you. And when you finally meet the right one, then you’ll finally realize learn why it didn’t work out with your exes.
