Think aloud
The bar for men is so low that it’s on the floor.
It’s always women who are ridiculed for the things we love and enjoy. Like all those romances we watched on the big screen or read in books could never teach us anything.
We have been shamed to extremes when we’ve written about love, but the misogynists who shamed us forgot something very crucial.
We know what it feels like to love and we know how to treat the people we love.
The other day, my friend came crying to me, saying how she doesn’t understand what she’s doing wrong anymore.
I listened to her sobbing and her frantic explanations of how she did so much in her relationship and he never made much of an effort.
You might have found yourself in this situation as well, never understanding why you were so upset.
That day, when my friend got home from work, she was so extremely exhausted that she just went to bed.
Her partner went up to her, demanding an explanation as to why she didn’t appreciate the fact that he had cleaned the house.
He continued to tell her how she doesn’t see his efforts and that she should have (at least) thanked him.
Let’s be honest, how many times does your man praise you for the work that you do around the home?
You can work for an entire day, cleaning everything, and he would still think it was nothing.
He thinks that it’s expected of you to work so much, but for him, it’s a one-time thing that should be noticed
You have to praise him for everything, like he’s a little kid in need of candy as a reward for every time he does something good.
The question stands: Would the relationship remain strong if it was the other way around?
He always makes a big deal about every time he cooks for himself, or for the both of you. Like it’s his gift to society.
He’s probably waiting for your praise.
He wants you to tell him how amazing he did and how grateful you are that he made one dinner for you two.
He did the bare minimum.
This man truly believes that he’s some saint for cooking food, like you don’t do that three times a day, seven days a week.
You do everything around the house and still have time to cook, take care of the kids and you probably have a full-time job as well.
Not to mention the fact that you can take full responsibility for how healthy your relationship with your partner is.
If things were reversed, if you asked for praise and never wanted to do anything unless it was a special occasion, he’d leave before you knew it.
Why? Because he believes that it’s common sense that you’ll do all of the housework, while he drinks and watches football games.
A man could never handle the same treatment he gives a woman.
That right there is a very simple fact.
He’d throw a hissy fit if he sent you ten text messages and you replied to none. It’s the same thing we endure, but he would make a fuss about it.
Do you really believe that he’d be able to restrain himself from calling you a million times if he didn’t know where you were for an entire night?
He chooses to spend the night with his friends at a bar, not caring that you’re home alone with the kids. If you did that, he’d call you a bad mother.
He’d say that you didn’t care about the children if you left them with him. The fact remains that you’re still at home, whenever he’s not there.
Another thing that’s funny to me is how whenever a man is taking care of his children when their mother is out, we call it babysitting.
What? No.
He’s taking care of his own children. He isn’t watching someone else’s.
It has just become so normalized that we don’t even flinch when we hear it. Imagine having this type of life and still thinking that you have the right to demand anything from a woman?
I’m pretty sure that any man would lose his mind if he endured the same treatment women did.
If you treated him even as remotely bad as he treated you, he would be miserable.
However, he thinks that he’s doing just perfect. Even women believe that a minimal sign of a male’s affection is enough to keep us happy.
We’re actually grateful for every single time we’ve come home to our partner making us dinner.
We’re so grateful for every single time they put in even the minimum amount of effort.
However, that’s because we know that we can’t expect much.
So the next time he tells you that he’s sick, send him a text message asking how he’s doing.
Don’t go running to him, with your cabinet of different medicines, trying to be there for him.
No. Treat him the same way he treats you.
When he gets confused about your behavior, recite to him every single time he’s acted like that toward you.
He’ll always call you needy, but take away anything that you do for him and see how he acts.
Men like to push the agenda that women can’t handle the truth but what if you told him the real truth?
What if you showed him the truth by acting the way a man acts for a day? I can guarantee you that his entire outlook on the world would change.
Your need to be loved and cared for is absolutely valid! You deserve to be pampered and spoiled.
If a man dares to say that it’s not reality, just tell him every single way you have pampered and spoiled him throughout the years.
He can tell you that you’re asking for too much and then make sure to remember how little you’re asking for, but asking for basic human decency isn’t a sin!
Asking to be cared for and loved the way you want shouldn’t be considered a favor. It should be considered common sense.
But it’s not. And it never will.
Just remember all of this the next time he calls you needy, selfish, or too demanding.
