Think aloud
The beginning of a relationship is a stressful time when you are not sure what will happen next. Whose turn it is to text, who is supposed to call first, and who is supposed to take the initiative and invite the other on a date? Who, who, who?!
Things are still unpredictable and you want that to change. You want to sail into the safe zone of a relationship where the uncertainty level will be as low as possible.
To go from an almost relationship to a real relationship, you need to take a small step. Still, sometimes it is hard to cross that bridge as things don’t seem to progress.
It gets even harder when you start having real feelings for an almost partner. You imagine the two of you together but the reality is proving you different.
The following signs can help you understand what will happen to your relationship.
If you notice any of them, unfortunately, you will not arrive at your desired destination as your almost relationship is doomed to fail.
1. No one knows that you two are seeing each other
A clear sign that your almost relationship is not going to turn into a real one is the secrecy behind it.
If he implicitly tells you that no one should know that you two are seeing each other, it suggests that he doesn’t want to make it official.
Hiding you from others suggests that he doesn’t want to have only one option as he is not ready for that step.
By keeping you secret, he gives himself the possibility to be with other women too.
Sure, relationships should be private but there is a difference between a private one and a secret one.
If he treats you like a friend in public and if he never wants to meet any of your friends or family, the chances are that he doesn’t want to get serious with you. He’s fine with keeping things casual and he is showing you that in a hidden manner.
2. Your communication is minimal
Your communication goes on and off as he doesn’t feel strong feelings toward you.
So, instead of dedicating his time to you, he makes it clear that he will text you when he has nothing else to do.
If you feel like you are there just to fill the empty space in his schedule, then your almost relationship probably won’t turn into a real one.
When a man is serious with you, he becomes more dedicated as he wants to show himself in a good light. One who doesn’t care what will happen next won’t bother to stay in touch with you.
Don’t be surprised if he doesn’t text you for days and then suddenly appears as if nothing happened. It is his way of showing you that you are not his priority.
3. They don’t let you in
Even if, by some miracle, you engage in a conversation, it will all seem shallow and superficial.
Not wanting to create any kind of emotional bond between you two is a crystal clear sign that your almost relationship will never be a real one.
If he wanted to make things official, he wouldn’t mind expressing himself emotionally to you. He will be good at letting you in and showing you his real self.
However, when a man doesn’t want to be in a relationship, he tends to keep everything as non-committal as possible. Creating a personal bond between you two would, in this case, be a sign of commitment and he’s not ready for that.
4. You feel like you are the only one who is making an effort
When a man doesn’t want anything serious, he stops making an effort. He keeps it for the other women while he lets you fight for him, even though he knows that you don’t stand a chance.
Making an effort is an obvious sign that creates a distinction between a man who cares and one who doesn’t.
If you feel like you are the only one who initiates the conversations and dates in general, then he doesn’t want to get serious with you.
One-sided relationships hardly ever work. A one-sided almost relationship will definitely not work.
If he has no intention of making an effort, then he probably knows what he wants from you.
Your intentions and his don’t correspond with each other. Everything is more important than you and he’s trying to make you understand that.
5. He is not willing to free up his time for you
If you are the one who cancels your plans for him, but he never does the same, then he’s not serious about your relationship.
If he wanted you to be something more, he would prove that to you through his actions. Don’t protect him by saying that he’s busy because if he wanted, he would make time for you.
When a man wants to keep things casual, he doesn’t care about spending more time with you.
He will do it only when it’s convenient for him. There is no other way!
Don’t fool yourself by believing that he will change and that he just needs some more time. Men know what they want and when they want it.
He’s probably not ready to enter into a real relationship as he is satisfied with the current stage you two are at.
If you were more important, things would be different.
6. He is not interested in your life
Besides the fact that he doesn’t want to let you into his world of emotions, he also doesn’t care about yours.
Do you have the feeling that you are telling him something personal and he’s looking through you, not hearing anything you say?
It’s like his body is bulletproof to your words.
When a man doesn’t want to make things official, he has no intention of getting to know you better. You are here to fill the void and that is all.
If he ever wanted you two to be something more, trust me, he would show it or say it.
If he forgets everything you tell him then he probably doesn’t care about your relationship and he is not looking for anything serious.
7. He is avoiding ‘the talk’
Whenever you bring up the topic of, “What are we?” he tries to avoid it for dear life.
He uses excuses such as, “I am not ready yet,” “I don’t want to take things too fast,” or, “I don’t like to label things. We are good the way we are,” to make it clear that he doesn’t want to be official.
However, he will never tell you that as he’s leaving you as a side option that he can come running to whenever he wants.
If he directly told you his intentions, you would probably walk away and he would be left hanging loose.
Instead of getting himself into this position, he practices avoiding ‘the talk‘ as it provides him with more security.
If you notice any of these signs, then it’s probably time for you to walk away. Time will not be on your side as it’s unlikely that his opinions will change.
He knows what he wants and at this point in his life, it is not you. He wants to keep it casual and you can’t affect that no matter how hard you try.
Instead of falling harder, appreciate yourself and know when it’s the right time to end things for good. Staying in an almost relationship that will never turn into a real one will never bring you happiness.