Think aloud
People have mixed feelings about the topic of availability. Whether or not we should be available to a man is a question only you can answer for yourself.ne
The truth, however, is the fact that being too available can push any guy away. Even if he’s extremely interested in you.
We have been taught that men are the ones who do the chasing.
In the meantime, on the other hand, we have set the bar so low that we see random texts as them chasing us.
Let’s start at the very beginning. So you met this guy and he seemed very communicative and open about himself, so you simply let your guard down.
You saw him as a potential partner because of how open-minded he was. He was willing to spend an excessive amount of time talking to you.
What could go wrong if you answered all of his calls? You’re the one who always accommodates his wishes, so he should be grateful!
What could go wrong is that he would see you as too available.
After a while, he will lose interest in you. It sounds quite scary when you think of it like that, to be honest.
Why would he lose interest in you when you are always there for him?
You’re always the one showing the most interest in his life and you really want him to make this work! So what’s happening? How can you be too available?
Availability is defined as being at someone else’s disposal. An available person is someone who can be used and obtained.
(Don’t come at me, that’s the definition of this adjective that we can all find in the dictionary.)
So why would anyone want to be used by a man, especially if they like him?
You make your life seem boring.
Let’s make up a situation; for example, you’re out with your friends and you get a text from him.
He wants to see you and he wants you to come over. What do you do?
Being too available means that you’ll ditch your friends and go see him, even though you are already in the middle of something.
You will tell him that you made time for him, even though you had something else happening.
He will see that as nothing more than you being available for him to use whenever he pleases.
You might not want that to be true, you might not want that to be the way he perceives you, but it is what’ll happen.
You simply can’t seem too available to a man. If he knows that he can have you whenever he wants you, your life will seem boring to him.
You will be the girl who has nothing better to do but spend time with him.
Keep in mind that this is worse when you two are not even a couple yet, even though letting your boyfriend have this privilege is also not okay.
Having boundaries is attractive.
The right person will want you to have the right boundaries. If he truly is the right man for you, he will respect your boundaries.
Boundaries are attractive because they show your confidence. You have to love yourself first.
We all look for a confident partner in our life because we will know that their confidence means that they have a healthy outlook on life.
If you don’t have that confidence, if you didn’t set healthy boundaries, then a man will take advantage of that, no matter how interested he was at the beginning.
He will see your lack of boundaries and he will use the opportunity to take advantage of you.
He will be interested in you because of that, but how long will that interest last?
We teach others how to treat us.
If you show him that there is nothing you wouldn’t do for him, then he will start to take that for granted.
When he sees that you haven’t asked for anything in return, naturally, he ends up using whatever’s left of your time and effort that he can.
You shouldn’t give him that luxury. You should be the one to reply to his texts when you have nothing better to do than to spend time with him.
Don’t just push everything aside to make room for him in your life.
Indulge in your own life, your own job, your own hobbies, your own friends.
He is just the icing on the cake, the rest of the cake are the other things in your life.
Men love the chase.
You might think that this is just a myth in the eyes of society, but it has a lot of truth to it. Men really do love the chase.
They love knowing that they have to put effort into obtaining your attention.
You will think that by being too available, he will continue to pursue you, but at some point, he will get bored.
It sounds harsh when I put it like that, but he will get bored with a girl who doesn’t have standards and who is willing to do whatever it takes to please him.
You have so much more to offer. You are a strong and wonderful woman. Don’t just let him have his way because you’re lonely or insecure.
He will lose interest in you because he will think that you’re too easy.
Men love women who don’t give them everything at once because their mysteriousness is what attracts them a lot.
Giving a man a run for his money is so satisfying and you won’t know until you try it.
He will lose interest in you if you’re too available.
I know that this has already been emphasized throughout this entire article, but it is the truth and we have to hear it even if we don’t want to.
If a man shows interest in you it’s because you seem so self-assured and confident when he meets you.
He sees a potential partner and he will want to pursue you.
You are being too available and you are pushing him away from you.
There is no reason for you to double-text him, answer his call on the first ring, or run to him whenever he calls.
No one wants a needy girlfriend and I’m sorry to tell you that it’s what you look like in his eyes.
Even if he thought you could be his soulmate, he will lose interest in the way you offer yourself up to him.
He needs to work to obtain your heart.
He probably hasn’t done anything that could make you believe he’s worth the attention you’re giving him.
Look at yourself. Look at how wonderful and amazing you are!
You have been through hell and you are still standing strong. Because of that, please be aware of your own worth.
You deserve to be treated like a queen and a man should have to work hard in order to obtain your heart.
He shouldn’t be able to have you whenever he pleases. He shouldn’t be able to have you at all unless he puts in tons of work and effort.
Stop being too available and start respecting yourself!
Start respecting yourself and your own time! I promise you that a man will see more worth in you and he will stick around for much longer if you respect yourself.
Your boundaries, your confidence, all of you is so attractive and you shouldn’t dumb yourself down for anyone, especially not a man.
The right man won’t get bored of you that easily, of course. However, even the right man, a good man, will want a woman who knows her own worth.
You can only attract an insecure man if you’re an insecure woman yourself.
On the other hand, if you are a confident, strong, loving creature, your true love will come and your heart won’t ever be broken again.
