You have serious intentions with this guy and you want him to feel the same way about you. Still, it feels that he’s been giving you signs he wants a casual relationship.
Welcome to the agony of wanting a serious relationship with a guy who wants to stay in the arena of casual dating. It’s the worst combination you could face.
When you find a guy who ticks all of the boxes and with whom you can imagine yourself in the future, the last thing you want to hear from him is that he wants to keep things casual.
Your good man is afraid of a committed relationship and has no intentions of getting serious with you.
If he openly admits to you that he’s not the kind of guy made for long-term relationships, at least you know where you stand.
Sometimes, men are afraid to admit the truth because they know that it can push a woman away from them. And he would much rather have you next to him until he gets bored than lose you at the very beginning.
Is he head over heels for you and does he want you forever? Or are you just a casual fling? This is the first-dating-world problem that we’ll tackle in this article.
What are some undeniable signs he wants a casual relationship?
When a guy wants a casual relationship, he may avoid making plans for the future or initiating deep conversations. He may also prioritize physical intimacy over emotional connection and may not introduce you to his friends or family. Keep an eye out for these signs to understand where you stand in the relationship.
1. He never tells you about his previous relationships
It’s normal that a guy won’t feel comfortable talking about his exes at the very start of your “relationship.”
But if you’ve been dating for a long time and he still never talks about his past relationships, then something might be wrong.
Every time you ask him why his previous relationship failed, he makes sure to change the topic just so he can avoid answering.
Chances are that none of his past relationships were serious and he doesn’t want you to know that.
If he admits the truth to you, then you might see through his plans.
This could be a good sign that he wants a casual relationship with you and will run away from anything serious.
2. He has zero or low-key plans for the future
When a guy wants to take your relationship to the next level, he makes important plans with you.
He might even mention moving in and getting married somewhere down the road.
But if you’ve noticed that your guy’s maximum when it comes to making plans is spending time at home watching Netflix or hitting up the club on a Friday night, then he’s not relationship material.
Whenever you hang out, it’s either this or that. He doesn’t make an effort to take you on a real date or do something different and exciting.
Instead, you have an already-established routine that won’t change any time soon.
A lot of time, this will prove to be one of the signs he wants a casual relationship.
When you notice that his plans don’t stretch too far into the future, it’s obvious that he’s not there for the long run.
3. He texts you at odd hours
Does he only text you in the middle of the night, even though you know that he’s not busy during the day? Does this happen on a regular basis?
If your answers are yes, then you’re faced with a serious red flag and a surefire sign that he wants a casual relationship with you.
Guys who have no serious plans with a girl usually find time for texting only in the middle of the night, when they’re feeling alone and bored.
If he wanted something serious with you, he would make sure to text you during the day so he could meet up with you.
This way it’s obvious what he wants from you – and it certainly isn’t the real deal.
4. He doesn’t go out of his way to see you
Guys with serious intentions aren’t afraid to go out of their way to see their girls.
They’re not afraid to show how they feel about a girl by doing something for her, even though it requires effort.
A guy who keeps making excuses is a non-committal guy who has no serious plans with you.
Why would he put effort into your relationship when he knows that he’ll be gone sooner than you can say “commitment-phobe”?
Because of that, he makes time to see you only when it’s convenient for him.
In the meantime, you can wait for him as long as you want, but he won’t shape his plans around you.
This is one of the obvious signs he wants a casual relationship and nothing more. He’s proven it to you through his actions.
5. He’s active on dating apps
When a guy finds a girl he likes and wants to be serious with, the first thing he does is delete all of the dating apps on his phone.
He no longer needs them as his dream woman is right next to him.
But have you noticed that your guy still has all of the dating apps and he shows no intention of getting rid of them?
And when you mention that he should delete those apps, he plays dumb.
When you think about it, why would he get rid of the source of other women when the two of you obviously aren’t exclusive?
And if he’s not in a serious relationship, then why should he stop using the dating apps?
By now, it’s plainly obvious that this is also one of the signs he wants a casual relationship with you.
If he can’t be bothered to get off those dating apps, it’s evident that he still hasn’t found the one.
6. He cancels on you last minute
When it comes to canceling plans, things are relatively simple. If he always last-minute cancels on you, then he doesn’t care about your plans.
If he doesn’t care about your plans, it means that he doesn’t care about you. And if he doesn’t care about you, then he won’t be serious with you.
A guy who truly wants to be with you would make sure to never bail on you.
He may change the time you’re supposed to meet, but he’d never stand you up or cancel on you at the last minute.
When you realize that most times when you had a plan to meet each other, it was him who actually canceled on you, this goes to show that his behavior is just another sign he only wants a casual relationship with you.
He doesn’t take you seriously and he shows it through his actions.
So, you better not expect him to show you what a real relationship is supposed to look like, because this guy isn’t fit for that role.
7. He tells you he’s not sure what he wants
It’s okay not to be sure what you want from a relationship while you’re still at the very beginning of it.
But if you’ve been going out for months, your guy is supposed to have realized by then what he plans with you.
It could be that he wants you in his life forever or that you aren’t his cup of tea. But as long as he lets you know the truth, everything’s fine.
However, if he keeps giving you an excuse that he’s not sure what he wants every time you ask him a serious question about your so-called relationship, then it’s obvious what he wants.
His lack of words to confirm what you’re already suspecting is giving him away.
Every time he avoids directly answering the question and gives you this lame excuse, he just confirms to you his non-committal behavior is another sign he wants a casual relationship.
End of story.
He might change his mind in the future, but right now, he doesn’t want to have anything serious with you.
8. He flirts with other women
Can it get more obvious than this?
It’s evident that if he’s flirting with other women, he wants nothing more than a casual relationship with you.
I mean, he’s obviously looking for other options besides you and that’s all you need to know.
Especially if you see him flirting with other women in front of you.
That’s a guy who’s intentionally sending you signals that he doesn’t want to have anything serious with you.
He has no intention of being exclusive with you, but if he openly tells you, he knows he risks losing you.
That’s why he’s giving you these signs and clues so you can figure it out on your own.
He’s hoping that you like him a lot and won’t leave him immediately.
In the meantime, he’ll look for some other girls as he’ll probably get bored with you sooner or later.
9. He never invites you to his special events
At some point in their relationships, couples begin inviting each other to their special events.
It can be anything – from his friend’s wedding to holidays spent with family.
The point is, as your relationship grows, you start looking for ways to show each other all of the parts of your life.
But have you noticed that this has been missing in your so-called relationship?
He already went to his friend’s wedding and made no effort to invite you. He spent holidays with his family without even asking you to come.
Everything he does, he does on his own, without ever calling you to be his plus one.
This could be another of the signs he wants a casual relationship with you.
If he’s not ready to commit to you, then he won’t make the effort to invite you to all those special events.
Why bother introducing you to the important people in his life when in a month’s time you’ll be gone?
At this point, you’re just a girl he’d have to cut out of the family picture because he knows that your relationship isn’t serious at all.
10. He’s never introduced you to his friends
If we were to give colors to these signs he wants a casual relationship with you, this one would be burning red!
When a guy meets a girl he can imagine his future with, he makes sure to show her off in front of his family and friends.
He does this to show that she’s an important part of his life and he wants everyone to know of her.
He’s also testing her to see if she’ll get on well with his closest friends.
But when he hides you away from all of your friends, there’s usually something fishy going on.
Every time he’s hanging out with his friends in the bar around the corner, he never invites you to drop by and meet up with them.
Or when they invite him to hang out, he always leaves you at home, even though you heard his friends inviting you as well.
It’s obvious that this guy doesn’t want you to be included in all of the parts of his life.
You’re probably just an option that he’s going to replace when he gets tired of you.
Naturally, he doesn’t want to bother himself with introducing you to his friends.
Also, what if they give him away and tell you about other girls in his past. He doesn’t want to risk that either.
11. He says he doesn’t want to be exclusive
Trust me, when a guy tells you that he doesn’t want to be exclusive, you can’t change his opinion over time.
If he had fallen for you head over heels, you would never hear this from him.
But because you’re just a girl that he can meet up with casually, whenever it’s convenient for him, he has no plans of getting serious with you.
By convincing yourself that you can change his mind, you’ll only end up going through an intense heartbreak.
If you don’t want to do that, face the truth and move on with your life.
He wants a casual relationship and it’s not only that he gave you a sign, but he actually told you the truth to your face.
So, don’t make excuses for him but admit the fact that he doesn’t want to be serious with you.
If you let yourself fall deeper for him while it’s obvious that he doesn’t want to have anything with you, you’ll only be making matters worse for yourself.
12. You’re the one who initiates dates
Are you the one who always calls him to spend time together? Does he never make an effort to see you?
If so, then it’s a sign that he wants a casual relationship and has no intention of having anything serious with you.
Usually, if a guy is really into you, he’ll invite you to hang out whenever he can.
This shows his involvement and interest. When a man likes you, he wants to spend all of his free time with you.
The same applies to girls.
But, if you’ve noticed that you’re almost always the one to ask him to hang out together, then it’s obvious that he doesn’t care about you the way you do about him.
His effort reflects his love, and right now, it’s sad to say that there’s no love for you in his heart.
13. He hides you from the world
First of all, you never hang out in public. Usually, it’s either his place or yours.
And when you make a suggestion to go somewhere else, he usually convinces you that he’s too tired to go and he’d prefer to have some alone time with you.
This is the first red flag that shows he’s hiding you from the world.
Red flag number two is when you notice that he never posts you on his social media.
It was okay at the very beginning of your “relationship,” but now you feel upset because of it.
It could be that he only wants to keep your relationship private and off social media.
But it could very well mean he doesn’t want to ruin his chances with other girls when they see a pic of you on his Instagram.
To be sure of the reason, check if you’ve noticed any other signs he wants a casual relationship.
If the answer is yes, then you’re most likely already in a casual relationship.
Also from this point of view, it’s hard to believe that the thing you have could ever turn into something serious.
14. He makes no effort to get to know you
When a guy likes you, he listens to you carefully and wants to know everything about you.
If you’re his dream woman, he’ll make an effort to get to know you better.
But, if he doesn’t care about you as much and has no serious intentions with you, then he won’t care about getting to know you as well.
Think about it! Has he ever asked you about your childhood memories, your biggest fears, and your wildest dreams?
Has he ever made sure to get to know the real you, hidden deep inside?
Because when you like someone, you want to know everything about them. You want to be able to understand them by simply looking into their eyes.
On the flip side, when a guy has no serious intentions with you, he won’t bother getting to know you.
To him, you’ll be just a number – just one of the girls who are standing in line to spend time with him.
You won’t find yourself having a deep conversation with him and he certainly won’t ask you anything about your life.
This is one of the clear signs he wants a casual relationship and isn’t planning to stick around for the long-run.
Sooner or later, he’ll be out of your life and you’ll be left wondering what this thing the two of you had was.
15. He fails to tell you that he likes you or misses you
Serious relationships are all about being there for each other and really noticing when the other person is absent.
When a guy likes you and wants to have something serious with you, he won’t be afraid to text you that he misses you.
He won’t be afraid to stop the conversation mid-date just to tell you that he’s into you.
But, if you’re going out with a guy who doesn’t want to have you in his life forever, then you won’t ever hear these words.
If he tells you that he likes you, he’ll be getting your hopes up and you’ll expect him to take the next step, which he clearly doesn’t want to take.
That’s why it’s much safer to keep everything as low-key as possible.
As long as he can hang out with you whenever he wants with no strings attached, he’s happy.
This is also one of the signs he wants a casual relationship.
He won’t show his feelings to you as, to be honest, he doesn’t feel anything for you.
You’re just one of the girls that will come and go through his life without leaving a special trace.
But if you’ve already fallen for him, then you might be in a different boat.
If you’ve already developed feelings for him, then this might hurt because a guy who shows most of these signs certainly isn’t boyfriend material.
He wants to keep things casual, which goes against your wishes completely.
The silver lining is that with a little help from this article, you can recognize all of the signs that give away his intentions.
They can help you move away from him before you get hurt.