I’ve been learning a lot about relationships these days. Apparently, there is something called “the talking stage.”
Back in the day, I, as a millennial, tried to explain to my parents that being in a relationship with a guy doesn’t mean I want them to meet him just yet. That was super confusing. Now imagine all those new dating terms Gen Zers are coming up with – oh my God, I’m getting old!
So, the talking stage is actually some kind of pre-relationship stage, where you two just talk for hours about anything and everything, into the early morning hours. You’re still not sure whether this is the person you want to start a serious romantic relationship with, but it’s going that way.
You may be afraid that you won’t get the answer you’re hoping for, but at the same time, you don’t want to waste your time if the other person is not that into you. What should you do then? Here are some tips on how to get out of the talking stage.
1. Chill out and give him space
Are you checking his Instagram again? Oh, it’s Facebook this time. Chill out, girl!
If you want to grab (and hold) a man’s attention, you have to give him space to breathe. He has to be able to do all the things he did before you came into the picture.
I know that in the early stages of a relationship, you’re impatiently waiting for him to answer your message, but he has to enjoy talking with you. The last thing you want is for him to think of you as an obligation. So, take it easy.
2. Don’t be available all the time
Is it wrong to assume that you have some hobbies yourself? Even if it’s just watching your favorite show on Netflix, be busy. Don’t answer his messages right away, make him wonder what you’re doing.
Start volunteering or take up a new hobby if you haven’t yet. That way you’ll have new things to talk about with your crush. Oh, and don’t always accept the invitation to go out with him on the day that suits him the best. Just politely tell him that another day would suit you better.
Men like to chase and if you’re not available every time he’d like to see you, you’re bringing some mystery stakes to the table and he’s going to be curious.
3. Take it slow
Don’t rush things. If you just started talking, why rush to get out of the talking stage? How can you be so sure that you want to spend the rest of your life with him? Are you sure this isn’t just a textationship?
Go on a couple of dates with him, discover his vices and virtues, and see what he likes and doesn’t like. Take some time to truly get to know him and go with the flow. Every relationship naturally develops with time, so exercise a bit of patience.
4. Suggest interesting dates and flirt
When it’s your turn to suggest a date, get creative. Think of something unusual and interesting, something you’d both enjoy doing. If he once mentioned that he likes spending time in nature, go ahead and prepare a picnic for the two of you.
Also, make sure you flirt. Use your body language to show him you like him. Try to make him smile and ask for some advice. Pay him compliments and find excuses just to touch him. Laugh at his jokes (even if they’re not hilarious).
I promise, he’ll be obsessed with you in no time.
5. Be honest and confess your feelings
I know this may be the toughest task on this list, but be open and confess your feelings honestly. Expressing your feelings will make him value you more because you were bold enough to do so. If he likes you, you won’t scare him off.
However, if the outcome is not the one you were hoping for, that’s completely fine. You’ll know where you stand with him and you won’t waste your time anymore. There is someone out there just waiting for a girl like you.
6. Integrate into his social circle
If a guy starts introducing you to his social circle, you can take it as a telltale sign a guy wants you in his life. So, if you get the opportunity, make the effort to slowly get to know his friends and family members. Just don’t force it, though, because that may only push him away.
Eventually, the people closest to him will start asking about you and he’ll think of you more often. Bonus points if they really like you and keep inviting you to spend more time with them. You have a high chance of winning this guy’s heart.
7. Be yourself and know your worth
This is hands-down the most important piece of advice I can give: Be yourself and know your worth! When you’re sure of who you are and what you deserve, you’ll be irresistible to every guy around you. Confidence is extremely attractive and makes a girl stand out from the rest.
You have to treat yourself the right way, so the person you like can treat you as you deserve to be treated. Trust me, there is nothing more valuable than being yourself with the one you love. That makes for the healthiest and most beautiful relationships.
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