The no-contact rule and the female psychology behind it seem quite intriguing, right? It’s like that one thing everyone’s heard about but there’s nothing to actually describe it. So what’s happening in a woman’s brain when she’s not contacting a man after he’s broken up with her?
Social media has become a huge part of our lives. We always post things on Instagram, message people on Facebook, and scroll through TikTok for hours. So when she doesn’t contact you for hours, days, or even weeks, you may be completely baffled.
You might have been hoping that you could still talk to her even if you broke up a while back. There’s a saying that no answer is also an answer but the no-contact rule works wonders when someone is trying to get over you.
You may just be sad that you missed an opportunity but either way, there’s something more to it. What’s she thinking? How is she dealing with all of this?
However, it’s quite interesting that you’re even asking yourself these things. I just wish you would embrace this time because it could be very beneficial for both of you.
I can’t believe that I’m going to reveal our secrets but on the other hand, this could actually help someone understand their partner better. This will give you a better look into the mind of a woman and what we go through.
Even if she looks like she’s doing okay, she’s probably hurting on the inside. However, things don’t always have to be this black and white. If anything, there’s something deeper behind everyone’s story.
Female psychology during the no-contact rule
1. She’s repulsed by you
Her mind is telling her to hate you right now. It doesn’t matter whether you did good things in your relationship when she’s not contacting you anymore, as she’s going to recall the worst moments the two of you shared. She’ll remember every single time her heart was aching because of you.
Even if she’s thinking about texting you, she probably won’t do so simply because it’s beyond her at this point. There’s no reason for her to even consider you right now.
The female psychology during the no-contact rule can be quite hard to understand but at the same time, it makes a lot of sense. You just have to remember all those things she said when you broke up.
This is her time to unwind and remember how to love herself without you in the picture. The only way she can do that is by doing her best to make you feel completely insignificant to her.
Even if her love for you was astronomical, she’ll still find things to hate about you. She’ll never make excuses for you again, especially now that she’s not blinded by her love for you.
2. She’s the victim who’s protecting herself
When a woman is a victim in the relationship, she’ll do anything in order to heal, even if that means taking a huge break from you.
She’s not contacting you at all right now and that could be because her friends or family have taken her phone away from her. It’s something you’d do to a child if they didn’t behave but sometimes a woman needs someone to do this for her.
A lot of people may experience Stockholm Syndrome when they’re in an abusive relationship. Women fall in love with their abusers and they always tend to see the best in them.
In these situations, it’s very hard to keep the victim away from the man who’s making her life a living hell. The first few days of no contact, she’ll feel like she’s falling apart but she’ll also know (somewhere deep down) that this is the best thing to happen to her.
Even if you didn’t abuse her, she has to get away from you. What better way to do that but to avoid your phone calls, delete your phone number, and start the period of no-contact?
If you were truly abusive toward her then there’s no reason for you to even consider contacting her at all, as she’s better off without you. Get yourself some psychological help, as you obviously need it if you believe that abusing a woman in any way shape or form is acceptable.
3. She’s angry at herself
The female psychology during the no-contact rule is one that’s quite universal. At some point in time, every single one of us has experienced it.
Most women experience anger in these situations. The anger is turned inwards and we feel it because we can’t believe that we allowed someone to treat us so badly.
She’s probably not much different. She’s ashamed of the decisions she made in the past and your mutual friends are just a reminder of everything she did wrong in your relationship, which drives her crazy.
Staying away from you at least gives her a feeling of security. She knows that this is a good thing and that as long as she’s apart from you, she’ll continue to love herself more.
The female mind isn’t that hard to understand. The period of time that she needs to move on from you is one that she also needs to stop feeling angry at herself.
She’s going to work toward self-improvement and the no-contact phase gives her the space to do that. The anger may eat her alive but it’ll also remind her that she’s finally out of a bad relationship.
4. She’s overthinking your entire relationship
One thing that’s universal for every woman is that we overthink everything. We’ve been brought up to believe that we need to keep ourselves safe at any cost, so overthinking has become a common issue for us.
It’s really the one thing that’s going to remind us that we have some type of control over our own life. It drains our energy completely but at least we know how to read people.
She’ll use this trick to analyze your entire relationship; from the first message you sent her to your parting words, she’ll dissect everything.
You may be wondering why someone would put themselves through so much pain but the truth is that it helps her feel authentic emotions. Once she starts to analyze everything, it’s only going to give her an even better reason to not communicate with you.
Her mental health may be declining because of it but it makes her feel a lot safer. She knows that she has to practice a 40- to 50-day no-contact rule in order to get a hold of herself, so that she has enough time to think.
Unless she convinces herself that you’re the best thing that happened to her and she doesn’t understand her own worth, you won’t get her back. Overthinking is always there to help a woman evaluate the things she couldn’t see before.
5. She may cry over or rationalize your break-up
The weirdest part about female psychology during the no-contact rule is that it can go from black to white in a matter of seconds. She’ll cry her eyes out on the phone one minute but she’ll be emotionless the next.
There are so many different ways that a woman goes through these emotions and that certainly means that she’s going through a roller coaster. She wants to pretend like everything is all right but the pain doesn’t subside.
She’ll try to rationalize her behavior by saying that the no-contact period is necessary at this point in time. However, the next moment, she’ll reconsider her decision because your absence will break her into pieces.
Even if you’re a narcissist, a woman who truly did love you won’t be able to move on so easily. It’s not that every woman wants her ex back, it’s just really hard to see things clearly when you’re eyes are full of tears.
The radio silence you’re hearing right now is just a reflection of her rational thought process. Your ex-partner is letting go, slowly but surely. Her heart is breaking within her chest but her mind is as sharp as ever.
She won’t try to keep in touch with you if she’s made the decision to start anew.
6. She’s thinking of stalking you for a while
Just about every woman out there will stalk her ex for a while and the female psychology behind the no-contact rule can completely confirm this. If she’s hurting and you’re happy without her, it’s going to break her doubly and that’s when so much resentment is born in her heart.
She wants to know what’s going on in your life. She’s not going to admit to this behavior but your ex feels like she has to keep tabs on you and this is because she’s hoping to find something so she can hate you even more.
When you want your ex-girlfriend back, it can be quite encouraging to see that she’s still stalking you, when you notice that she goes through your profiles daily.
If you don’t think that she can do this because she blocked you, then you’re wrong. As women, we find every way possible to still see what our exes are up to. We use our friends’ accounts, we make fake accounts, and so on.
It’s a little bit creepy, I’ll admit that much, but it’s not something that should scare you. The information she gathers is harmless and is either there to settle her curious mind or so she can hate on you more.
7. She’s hurting but she’s moving on
Why would you think that a woman is stuck on her past relationship in the first place? The two of you are going through your no-contact period because she knows that she has to move on.
Yes, she’s hurting. She’s probably blaming you and blaming herself while also maybe hating the fact that she let you treat her badly. But she’s not going to go back to you if she’s successfully getting through this period.
Even if she’s breaking apart from the inside out, she’s still moving on. She’s trying really hard to get her life together and to remind herself of the things she’s worthy of.
The male mind often can’t understand this. Once you start to realize that it’s your fault, you want her back. You remember all of those moments that made you fall in love with her and you think about begging her to go back to you.
A woman who’s adamant in her quest to stop talking to you will not, I repeat, will not go back to you. This just means that she’s aware of the things she can get from a man who actually knows how to treat her right.
8. Sometimes, she latches onto her emotions
The main difference between the dumper and the dumpee is the way their emotions change. The dumper often starts off happy or proud but soon after, it turns into sorrow.
While the dumpee is going through a lot of pain right after the break-up, it doesn’t take them long to turn that into something else. Be it anger or happiness, it doesn’t matter, but they don’t cry for long.
That’s why she’s holding on to the emotions you created inside her chest. She’s holding on to the anger and resentment she’s feeling and that’s what’s helping her get through this period.
The no-contact rule is a hard thing to follow sometimes but in female psychology, it’s easy to understand that we latch onto emotions that can help us get through such a tough time more easily.
That’s why she’s always thinking about how lucky she was to get out of the relationship whenever she gets the urge to contact you. She’s trying hard to hold herself back from making a dumb decision.
9. She’s thinking that no one can change the image she has of you
One of the crucial things you need to understand about female psychology when she’s established the no-contact rule is that she’ll likely be stubborn as hell. She doesn’t care that her ex-boyfriend was once her best friend, as right now all she knows is that you broke her heart and nothing can change that.
At times, she’ll overthink everything. In those moments, she’ll be sad that she didn’t get to hold on to your friendship but she’ll be happy that she’s out of the relationship.
During this period, she won’t listen to anyone. She doesn’t care if your friends are trying to convince her to take you back or if her friends are trying to reason with her. Her decision has been made.
There’s no room for anything else right now as she’s the type of woman who sticks to her word.
10. She’ll look at things from a whole new perspective
I once heard that you can’t see red flags when they’re facing you straight-on. This makes sense actually, considering that we’re aware of the issues once we’re out the door.
Just about every woman is overly considerate in a relationship. Nearly every single one of us has made dozens of excuses for our exes before we realized that we need to pack our bags and run.
Once she’s out the door, that’s when she’ll start to understand all the things her friends warned her about. Now is the time when she’s going to see right through all of your schemes and finally set herself free.
All those things that she wasn’t able to understand because of her rose-colored glasses will be clear as day at this point.
11. She won’t be thinking of jumping into a rebound relationship
When someone gets out of a serious relationship, they may jump into a new relationship in a matter of weeks but rebound relationships are nothing more than an unhealthy coping mechanism. People jump into something new when they’re not ready for it because they don’t know how to handle the rejection.
Being alone after a long-term relationship is torture for someone who hasn’t been single in so long but I can guarantee you that a woman with high self-esteem won’t take that route. She’ll create a much better support system for herself in order to deal with things in a healthy manner.
You won’t get text messages saying that she’s desperate for your attention, just like no other man will. She knows that she’ll heal much more quickly if she stays away from you and continues to give herself time.
The no-contact rule was made for her and situations like these. Now you understand that not every woman goes back after being dumped by a low-value man.
12. She’s thinking about breaking the power dynamic
When you’re asking yourself whether no contact works on women, you just have to understand that this is when the power dynamic will be destroyed. She’ll take her power back and it won’t end the way you’re hoping it will.
If anything, you’ll get the opposite result than the one you’re hoping to see. You hope that she’ll miss you once you stop reaching out to her but once you stop showing any type of interest, she’ll go completely cold.
She doesn’t need a guy who’s not even bothered to text her a few times a day. Your plan may have been to show her who’s the real winner in this game but it only reminded her that she’s been nothing more than one of the board pieces.
She knows now that she’s so much more than that and she’ll never settle for less. This is her time to shine because she’s finally breaking the power dynamic that you built around your relationship.
She understands that a guy who cares for her wouldn’t put her through so much pain. Now, she’s a girl who won’t respond to you even if you beg her to do so. She’d much rather live her life knowing that she chose herself over a toxic guy.
13. She’ll use this time to become a better version of herself
Female psychology is something amazing to see when a woman engages in the no-contact rule. During this time, she’ll try to become the best version of herself. She understands that she can’t mope around her house for days without any progress, as she’s going to lose her mind otherwise!
Every human being needs a distraction in these times, so she’s going to bring something productive into the game. Why would she waste her time lying in her bed crying when she’s done more than enough of that already. What she needs to do right now is bring herself back on her own two feet and work on herself.
If you can’t see the incredible woman she’s always been, then you need to understand that she’ll become an even better version of herself in record time. Now that she doesn’t have to spend her time on the phone calling or texting you, she can go to the gym, read all those books that were on her TBR, and then have a night out with her girls.
If you believe that you’re essential for her life, then honey, you need a reality check.
Final thoughts
The no-contact rule and the female psychology behind it aren’t that hard to understand once you get to know a woman well enough. Not every female will react this way but nowadays, we tend to waste less and less time overthinking and crying after a break-up, especially during the no-contact period.
During this time, you’re just letting her know that’s she’s capable of living a life without you. With your constant absence in the past, you probably taught her a long time ago that you’re not essential to her happiness anyway.
No one can tell you with certainty what her thought process is going to be because she herself will be confused. She’ll want to get a hold of herself but she’ll also find ways to let the frustration and anger out.
During the no-contact period, you’ll finally understand the value she had in your life. The issue here is that your time to make things right is very limited.
When you’re looking at the female psychology, know that she’s calling upon her divine feminine energy to come and help her out. The very moment this happens, you’ve lost her forever, so good luck crying yourself to sleep.
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