Toxic Texting: 7 Classic Examples Of Narcissist Text Messages

Dating a narcissist
By Jane Ackles
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Some of the examples of narcissist text messages will really show you how manipulative these people can be. You might think you’re prepared for it, but trust me, you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.

These are the type of people who can make you fall in love with them quite easily. They even know how to do it over a simple text message, don’t ask me how.

Narcissists can find their way around and know how to get underneath your skin. But the bad news is that once they’re under, it’s an impossible mission to get rid of them. They’re like leeches that feed off of people’s energies.

Because of their manipulative ways and their sweet talk, narcissists easily sneak their ways into our lives. Before we know it, they’ve made themselves at home.

You become their victim in the blink of an eye. In order to prevent this from happening, we’re going to take a look at some of the examples of messages you can get from a narcissist. Afterward, we’ll discuss their hidden meanings and see what can be done to avoid the unpleasant experience.

Most people get some kind of stage fright when they have to respond to a narcissist’s text message. I understand the reason behind it.

However, showing any signs of weakness will turn you into a deer running away from its predator. It only gives them the thrill they’re longing for.

That’s why you always end up in these unenviable situations that you find hard to get out of. Once a narcissist seizes the opportunity, they won’t let go that easily.

What are some of the narcissists texting habits?

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First of all, I have to say that narcissists are unpredictable people. You can never know for sure what their next step is going to be.

Therefore, you must take all of the precautionary measures if you’re planning on playing this game with a narcissist. Honestly, it won’t be an easy fight.

They’re sly, manipulative, and can easily trick you into anything. Their convincing ways will sweep you off your feet before you can even blink twice.

They’re such masters and con artists in real life. However, you can also find a narcissist online, over a text. It might be harder to identify one, but it’s possible.

Eventually, they’ll give themselves away because they’re highly impatient. They want to claim the prize they’ve worked so hard for. Therefore, you can’t completely wipe out a narcissist from your life in the beginning, but you can learn to distance yourself from them.

There are some narcissist habits that they use while texting. This could make it a whole lot easier for you to be sure whether you’re dealing with a narcissist or not.

Most of these habits and strategies might be familiar to you, especially if you have some experience with narcissistic behavior. These strategies are used to deceive the victims and are the same for all people with NPD.

Therefore, we can safely say that narcissists aren’t usually the gentlemen they present themselves to be. Examples of narcissist text messages and their strategies will definitely paint the whole picture. So, here’s what you can expect from them.

1. Gaslighting

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It’s a form of emotional abuse when the bully makes you doubt yourself through a variety of strategies. To obtain an edge, they engage in dishonest behavior.

For instance, the situation was excellent, and you truly felt like you were making progress. You could have even had a few meetings and even discussed going on dates or having a talk about your relationship.

Despite everything, he quickly chose to cease contacting you and go cold turkey. You initially felt incredibly upset and yearned for him to explain himself.

How could he suddenly stop sending you text messages when everything went so smoothly? You developed an affection for him, and you couldn’t have imagined that you would ever lose him in this way.

The majority of people who are prone to gaslighting others have a narcissistic personality disorder. They manipulate your mind to the point where you believe your memory has been damaged. Your perspective of reality is frequently distorted by the individual who’s playing these games with you.

They really give themselves a head start as a form of manipulation. They will control your ideas, your mind, and everything else if they do it that way.

Some of the hints your abuser has been leaving might take some time to find. Your gaslighter will gradually infiltrate your head, causing you to lose your cool.

You begin to doubt your behavior and yourself when you are gaslighted. However, their convincing ways will assure you that it’s not a huge problem and that it’s also the proper course of action.

Because of how persuasive they are, you’ll probably wind up not giving it any thought. They reassure you that everything is okay and going according to plan.

2. Love-bombing

Narcissists utilize the technique known as “love bombing” to manipulate their victims by showering them with love and attention. It’s used to win their trust and increase their compliance.

Such expressions are like nirvana when they emerge from the lips of the person you’re crushing on because they sound so beautiful. But if you receive these praises frequently, especially when you’ve only recently begun conversing or dating, they tend to lose their value.

A narcissist doesn’t want you to set up barriers that would prevent him from getting close to you or from expressing your affection. This only indicates that he has no regard for you at all. He would respect your wishes if he truly cared about you.

He will send enormous bouquets of flowers to your place of employment because the gifts he sends are extravagant and completely improper, and he never stops sending them no matter how uncomfortable they make you feel.

What transpires if you ignore him for five minutes? He’ll probably text you immediately to find out why you haven’t responded.

This is a clear indication of love bombing, as well as an indication of a lover who’s becoming extremely possessive. He could even advise you to always have a location-sharing app open so he can follow you. You understand his concern, but this is simply too much.

There are many examples of narcissist text messages that involve love-bombing, as you’ll see. Unfortunately, many of them sound all too familiar.

3. Ghosting

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You know when you feel like everything finally fell into its place? But you also know that this happiness can only be short-lived and you already anticipate a disaster.

He ghosted you without warning, which makes you angry, and you now want to ask him what went wrong. That’s one more narcissist strategy to manipulate you.

If you run into him by any chance, don’t even inquire as to why he stopped contacting you. Act as though you don’t care about him at all to the extent that you were blindsided by his ghosting.

He will be upset by this knowledge even if he had no affection for you. The moment he discovers you didn’t even care about him enough to notice that he no longer messages or calls you, his self-esteem will begin to decline.

He’ll begin to believe that you were the one who pulled a joke on him because it’s clear that you’re not affected by his leaving. He’ll become upset by this and start to think about the interaction the two of you had.

The examples of narcissists’ text messages and the tactics they use while texting can be heartbreaking. But what’s there really to expect from a person suffering from a narcissistic personality disorder?

One day they’re love-bombing you, and the next day they’re completely ghosting you. Narcissists take people for granted and that’s a fact.

You can never trust them to be completely honest with you. It’s a sad reality, but it’s better if you accept that rather than all the lies a narcissist uses to make you even more gullible.

Actual examples of narcissist text messages

You’ve undoubtedly figured out that messaging a narcissist is substantially different than texting someone else. Every time you realize that you have a new message from them, you could discover that you start to feel nervous, agitated, or irritated.

Additionally, you could occasionally feel tempted to block them. This is because narcissistic text messages tend to be mostly fabricated and quite manipulative.

A narcissist frequently chooses his words carefully and uses this mode of expression to temporarily bolster his ego. To feel significant, narcissists require your affection and attention.

Without it, they either become irate or seductive in an effort to lure you back in. So, a narcissist may frequently go from being openly romantic to being nonexistent in his communication.

As a result, they come out as haughty and demanding or just plain cold and aloof. This is demonstrated by narcissistic text messages, as you might expect.

You will feel the effects, which are detrimental and demoralizing. They make it seem like it’s your fault, which makes their narcissistic texting style much worse and causes you to doubt and perhaps even hate yourself.

1. Bombardment

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Each text you receive from them pulses with urgency and the implied expectation that you will want to respond as soon as you can with the necessary level of empathy and eager solicitude.

They may even send you a couple of text messages in a row. Different strategies are used in narcissist text messages and it’s not hard to think of some examples.

An example of this is when they want your assistance immediately. After that, they’ll text you repeatedly with the same message. Even worse, they could phone you a number of times in a minute without understanding that you might be otherwise occupied.

Examples in this situation include “Call me now,” “What’s wrong with your phone,” “Can you call me now please,” and others.

This isn’t an isolated incident or a sign of a serious emergency. Total bombardment occurs when a narcissist is in need of affirmation.

And when they’re aware that you’re going to be inaccessible, they tend to feel the most desperate. This is all done in order to reel you in some more.

Narcissists need to have their victims close to them at all times. This way they can ensure that they have a strong impact on them and they can’t wriggle out of their arms that easily.

You’d be really surprised if you fully understood to what extent these people are willing to go. And all that is just an effort to manipulate you.

Some of these examples of narcissist text messages can help you see that. It really makes you wonder are narcissists are even aware of what they’re doing.

2. The drama queen

Drama makes narcissists the focus of attention, thus they adore it. For example, he might call you in the middle of the night about some made-up crisis. However, playing the victim during a crisis is one of the most usual narcissistic strategies.

You would anticipate narcissist text message examples like “I had an accident, but I’m okay now” in this situation. Or maybe even “I have some horrible news, but there’s nothing you can do about it.”

But consider how you typically feel when you get these texts. Do they seem a little unnatural to you? Dramatic or excessive? Embarrassing? Whatever the feeling might be, it’s certainly not a pleasant one.

These feelings imply more malign motives. Partners in sincere, loving relationships really affirm and complement one another. While it isn’t extravagant, it suffices for both parties to feel valued.

However, narcissists frequently use meaningless phrases to influence another person’s emotions. They may not always mean what they say, but they say it in an effort to influence your feelings.

And what better method to accomplish this than with a brief text? In situations like these, they really know how to get a hold of the reins.

3. A word salad

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Schizophasia, a mental illness that frequently affects patients with schizophrenia when they mistake words, is referred to as “word salad” by psychologists. The Merriam-Webster article goes on to say that the phrase has come to be widely used to refer to the incomprehensible language.

A “narcissist word salad” is just a tangle of phrases, frequently including a circular argument. It’s not just one of those long love messages you’d expect from a partner.

Nevertheless, you may anticipate hearing phrases like “You really get on my nerves sometimes, but I love you, but you also need to show me some love” in an example of a narcissist’s text message.

The main goal is to place the blame on you, thus the best course of action is to adhere to the facts or ignore them.

The narcissist will bombard you with sentences quickly one after the other in order to overwhelm you with words and make it difficult for you to organize them into a single, logical message.

What they’re really trying to achieve here is to confuse you to the point where you just can’t comprehend what’s happening. Then you’re more likely to just go with it and agree with what they have to say.

4. Wrong person texts

Have they ever claimed you weren’t the intended recipient of an odd, enticing, or too intimate text they sent you?

Although mistakes do occur, if this has happened to you more than once or twice, it’s most likely not an error. Simply put, the narcissist is once again trying out a different tactic on you.

They could be experimenting with various methods of communication, for instance. They could be messaging other individuals to let you know how “important” they are.

If they expose anything to you that they haven’t yet explicitly told you, they can even be trying to make you envious. When you start to feel too good about yourself, the narcissist will use guilt, shame, and fault-finding to bring you down a notch.

They want to be the reason you’re happy if you are. If not, they will lower you by three pegs in order to raise you by two.

Unfortunately, this seems to be working in most cases. Their strong communication skills and the ability to manipulate other people go hand in hand in these examples of narcissist text messages.

It’s one of those things that happen before you can even put your finger on it. Only later on will you be able to realize the things they put you through.

5. Demanding things

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Keep in mind that narcissists require that everything revolves around them. It’s unfortunate because this implies narcissist communications may be demanding and condescending.

For instance, “I need you to do me a favor, I swear I’ll make it up to you“, “Come get me tomorrow from work,” and similar texts are examples of narcissistic demands they have for you.

As you might have guessed, all of the promises and paybacks they mentioned will never see the light of the day. They just write that in the spur of the moment to convince you to do these things for them.

You’ll be bothered by narcissist text messages that emotionally assault you. You’ll eventually come to believe that everything’s your fault. You start to think you’re to blame for their suffering.

An example of narcissistic text messages such as these ones might take a toll on you. It’s not one of those texts where you demand something because you know you deserve it.

After that, they disappear for a few days or perhaps weeks and continue ghosting you. The plan is to have you return the favor by pleading with them.

Not to mention the subliminal narcissistic text messages that happen afterward. These are less obvious, but just as harmful. They continue to crave your attention, but they do it by acting like frightened animals.

Texts like “Why don’t you love me anymore?” or “It hurts to be forgotten,” for example. Nevertheless, you’ve taken no action to disregard or damage anyone.

The majority of individuals occasionally send matter-of-fact messages (especially when it’s urgent), but narcissists frequently come out as constantly demanding.

6. Putting you down

A narcissist will frequently humiliate and degrade you in their texts. They could be critical of your friends or even your clothing. This could even threaten and belittle you.

Of course, they anticipate that you would immediately stop what you are doing and attend to their demand. These texts might appear out of the blue.

They could show up if the narcissist is aware that you’re preoccupied and unable to grant their request. If that happens, they will probably retaliate later saying that you never pay attention to their requirements. It was intended to be a lose-lose situation.

To try and put you down, a narcissist will do everything he can in order to destroy your confidence. Examples of these narcissistic text messages can sound all too familiar over time.

For instance, he comes out of the blue saying things like “You’re unable to make your own choices; that’s why you need me by your side.”

This way he’s trying to gain your trust and, at the time time, attempting to question yourself. The end goal of these text messages is to gain full control over you and your actions.

7. Making you lose your mind

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A narcissist will gaslight you even over a text. One of the examples of narcissist text messages could be something along the lines of: “You know I only do this because I love you and it’s for the best.”

You not only begin to question your feelings, but you also begin to question reality. You could believe that everything is simply déjà vu, but it’s not.

Your deceiver is trying to convince you that you’re making up stories about events that never happened. You may feel as though you are continually in the wrong and are clueless about what’s going on.

You’ll eventually agree with them and begin to accept their claims without question. Before you realize it, you find yourself imprisoned in their world and under their control.

Because of this, you feel separated and alone, which makes you feel more uneasy and continuously question your abilities. You stop believing in your own reliability and begin to depend even more on your abuser.

The worst thing with gaslighting is you don’t even know it’s happening until it’s too late.

How to respond to these examples of narcissist text messages

It’s really simple to come up with examples of narcissistic text messages. It almost seems as though the social media and instant messaging age were created with narcissists in mind.

However, there are steps you may take to maintain your sanity. It’s not always easy to know what to text a narcissist or how to reply to a narcissistic text message.

You shouldn’t feel compelled to answer in order to increase someone else’s self-esteem since doing so would be unhealthy communication habits to get into. Here is some useful advice.

1. Set some boundaries

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You must be clear on what’s acceptable for you while dealing with narcissistic text messages. This naturally presupposes that you’re aware that you’re dealing with a narcissist.

You may immediately instruct them to text you just after standard business hours as an example. Once more, you might kindly let them know that you prefer not to get calls at odd hours.

You are under no need to reply to every single text the narcissist sends you. Additionally, you are not required to answer right away after getting them either. Even if you don’t have a narcissist in your life, it seems sensible to set limits on how much time you spend on technology.

Remember that narcissists frequently believe they will be the exceptions in other people’s lives. They reject following rules.

So, you can anticipate them trying to push your boundaries or ignoring them entirely. Therefore, it is up to you to adopt a firm attitude.

2. Take your time

Don’t add to the word salad or constant barrage. It is quite appropriate to send a straightforward response if and when you do react.

And don’t feel obligated to respond to every inquiry they make of you. They will assume that their level is the only one that is acceptable the more you strive to “meet their level”.

Many narcissist text message examples seek to engage you in a discussion. Although it may be tempting, the best course of action is to keep texts brief and let them know you may speak with them in person.

You might also say that this isn’t a topic you’d like to talk about. Sure, they won’t back off in an instant, but you’ll see progress gradually developing.

Most narcissists won’t bother or take time and spend all their energy on someone who’s not willing to back down quite easily. They’ll simply skip on to the next victim if you cut them off.

3. Disengage

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The best course of action for reacting to the narcissist’s text messages is frequently to completely disengage. Aim to adopt a more impartial stance by saying nothing at all rather than engaging in argumentation or attempting to “show them” why they are incorrect.

A relationship with severe narcissists is challenging. Although it isn’t impossible, the emotional journey might be quite dreadful and exhausting.

If you don’t pay attention to them, they may get offended and start to love-bomb you. However, once they see they have no use for it, they’ll eventually lose interest in you.

A narcissist isn’t someone who can easily connect with a person on a deeper level. Therefore, they won’t find it really hard to move on.

4. Block and delete their number

For no apparent reason, a narcissist may ban you and remove your social media access. He could reconnect weeks later and love-bomb you.

Following that, you can receive narcissistic texts such as, “I’ve been distant by choice to have some time to think about things, and I now realize I love you and need you.” While this might sound convincing and you’d love to hear this from someone sincere, it’s just another attempt to get back to you.

Hearing this from a narcissist can never bring you any good because they’re not genuine. You might need to block the narcissist if you’re ready to put an end to narcissistic abuse.

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