Throughout life, you’ll meet a ton of people. Most of them will leave at some point, and only the rare ones will stay.
But instead of appreciating those who show you their real face and prove to you that they will go with you through thick and thin, we all focus on those who leave. We give them more importance than they deserve.
Even though these departures hurt, don’t let yourself think that you’re less than good enough only because they didn’t want to stay. I know you may feel like you’re losing a piece of yourself every time someone waves goodbye at you, but none of those things matter.
You’re not defined by the people from your past. You’re not defined by those who leave. That’s the only truth you to need to know.
Parents who focus way too much on their own worries don’t define you. You had to move away from them because they never knew how to show you love.
They worried excessively about everything else except for you, and you have nothing to do with that. It’s not your fault that they were incapable of sharing love with you as it’s obvious that they didn’t even know how to love themselves in the first place.
You’re not defined by a boyfriend who broke your heart in two. To him, you were just a pawn he used to gain the attention of the other girl. To you, he was your whole world.
Do you now think that it’s your fault that he decided to leave? Do you think that you were the one to blame for your relationship ending?
The only mistake you made is that you loved him too much. And trusted him a bit more than he deserved. But you shouldn’t blame yourself for that either, since we don’t choose how deeply we’ll fall for someone.
When your feelings are real, you lose control over them and let them take you wherever they want. Sometimes, you’ll end up thriving, and sometimes, you’ll end up hurt. But you never know what the outcome is going to be.
That’s why you should never blame yourself for the times you loved dearly and the other person turned against you. People like that don’t define you as they were wrong for you from the start.
You’re not defined by a friend who decided to talk trash behind your back because that’s the only way she could feel better than you.
She was never your real friend – she only used you to boost her ego. Her self-esteem was probably low and she needed something to lift her up.
Since she saw in you everything she ever wanted to be, putting you down seemed like a great way to launch her into the sky.
So why would you then think that it’s your fault that she decided to betray your trust? That you’re the one to blame for everything she did to you?
People like her don’t care about others’ feelings, so why do you then pay so much attention to her?
She never deserved you in the first place. And by going against you, she only proved to you that not all friends you have in life will be real.
Most of them are only pretending and will be gone the moment they don’t need you anymore. They will use you for their own benefit and once they get what they want, they’ll leave as if you meant nothing to them.
“Friends” like that don’t define you, and they don’t make you any less valuable than you actually are. Your worth doesn’t decrease with their ability to bail on you.
You’re not defined by those who came into your life, made a mess, and then left. By those who didn’t know how to love you right, even though you gave them your best. Or by those who called you too much or not good enough.
Any person who had something to say against you is now out of your life, and that’s exactly where they should be. They don’t deserve your attention or a spot in your world.
So, instead of wasting your time thinking that you’re the one to blame for their inability to stay, focus on those who are still in your life, after everything you’ve been through.
You’re defined by the love you give to your sister whenever she feels like her world is falling apart. By the advice you share with her and the brightest smile you give her to always cheers her up.
You’re defined by that one friend who’s always there for you because she appreciates everything you’ve done for her.
All those nights when she stayed up all night because you needed her help. All those times you called each other up in tears and gave each other words of comfort.
You’re defined by the kind helping hand you offer to your old neighbor every time you spot her carrying heavy bags from the grocery store. It’s the purity of your heart that defines you, not all those who decided to leave your life.
Bear in mind that people will keep coming and going out of your life. Rare ones will decide to stay, but there’s nothing wrong with that. You don’t need all of them, you only need the real ones.
If you have that one person you can call whenever times get hard, then count yourself lucky. You have someone to rely on, and it doesn’t get any better than that.
You don’t need all those people from your past who were clearly wrong for you. No, you don’t need those who decided to leave and you certainly don’t need to measure your worth through them.
You’re not defined by all of the wrong ones. Instead, you’re defined by everything you give into the world, by your kind heart and pure soul. These are the only things that matter.
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