It’s easy to forget your own value when your entire attention is turned toward a man who was never able to see the real you. He saw fractions of you and thought that he knew you, but he never did.
When one person doesn’t see your worth, you usually don’t take it too seriously. You figure it’s their fault to begin with, or you simply cry it out and then forget about it.
But what happens when you loved that person from the bottom of your heart? When that person who betrayed you and tossed you aside was someone you wanted to love for the rest of your life?
That’s when things aren’t that easy to overcome. It’s not the same when an acquaintance betrays you and when your significant other does that to you.
You were never a damsel in distress. You were always the woman who’s aware of the things she’s good at and the things that she has to work on.
You’ve never been one to fall on your knees for a man – and that’s why you were so interesting to him. He wanted you because you seemed like you had your entire life together.
When he came around, he fell for your strength. You seemed so confident, even though your inner turmoil would break you from time to time.
But you never let it get the best of you. You would still square your shoulders, hold your head up, and walk through life like that.
Until he came around and broke you into pieces.
You’d think that no one could have the ability to do that so easily, but obviously, he was someone who carried your entire heart in his hands and he didn’t know how to treat you right.
A woman like you should be treated with the utmost respect, but he obviously had other plans in mind.
When you met him, it was like he was everything you ever wanted in a man. Kind, caring, loving, and most of all, respectful.
So where did that go? Was it all just a way to claim your heart, make you fall in love with him, and then discard you?
This possibility may break you, but it’s not something you should just easily brush aside. Men these days don’t really think before they go after a girl, because everything seems so temporary to them.
You didn’t know it at that time, but you were temporary to him, too.
He didn’t see your worth, nor did he care to spend some time to get to know you. He just made sure to know enough to win you over and make you trust him.
I know that I make him sound like a villain, but what else was he?
When a man walks out on you like that, it makes you feel like you were the second choice all along. You feel discarded.
I felt like that as well. I fell harder and deeper than ever before, then I watched his back as he walked out of my life at a time when I needed him the most.
Actually, I kicked him out, because he thought that being with another woman was the perfect way to break my heart.
Just like you, I also thought that no one would make me forget my worth. Even at times when I doubted it, somewhere deep down, I knew that my worth was never dependent on a man.
But then he walked into my world.
He would sweet talk me into obeying his rules. There was no need for me to object because he made everything sound so logical.
After a while, I listened when he told me to turn down that job offer I always wanted. I listened when he said that all my friends were against me, even though a small voice inside me wanted to object.
At one point, it was obvious that he was all I had. So I clung to him for dear life, because that’s what he’d taught me to do.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you that master-manipulators aren’t out there, because they are. They’re among us and they make it seem as if they’re the kindest people on earth.
He made me trust him, to the point where all my validation came from his compliments. I thrived on his praise and always wanted more.
I wanted him to tell me that I was worthy of his love because I never felt like that before I met him.
So when the fights started, I crumbled inside. I wanted him to love me, but he didn’t. He never did, I was just holding on to rare, gentle moments that led me to believe he did.
When someone does things like this to you, they inevitably make you believe that you aren’t enough. I thought that there wasn’t anything I could do to reclaim my power.
He chose another woman over me and made sure to break my heart in the process.
That’s when you start to question your value. You start to question everything and at the same time feel like you’ll never get the answers.
But most importantly you feel worthless. Because you think that if you were good enough, he wouldn’t have treated you like that, he wouldn’t have run to someone else.
I know the lesson here is so obvious, but it took me so long to figure this out: Your value doesn’t decrease just because someone wasn’t able to see your worth!
Right now, it seems like you’re holding on to your sanity by a mere thread. He took your heart with him, so you’re incapable of even loving yourself right now.
But trust me when I say that this will pass. And you’ll realize that he’s the one who’s not worth the wasted tears. You’ll realize that your worth has and should always come from within you – never from a man!
You’re the one who’s always there for yourself because you’re one of the strongest people out there! There’s so much you have to offer the world, he’s stupid for ever doing this to you.
One day, he’ll look back and realize that he should’ve held on to you. The very moment he lost you, he lost a beautiful human being who could’ve given him everything.
So don’t despair right now! He doesn’t deserve you anyway. Your love is sacred, so hold on to it until you meet someone who’s ready to give you the same treatment in return.
Just because he wasn’t able to see your worth, doesn’t mean that no one ever will. But don’t let yourself be one of the people who forgets their value, because you’re so much more than just someone’s girlfriend or so-and-so’s wife.
You’re an incredible individual who has so much more to offer than to just belong to someone.
So don’t forget your own value, even when everyone around tries to convince you that you’re worthless. Be happy that man is out there, somewhere, where karma will get him. You’re here and you’re safe.
You’re safe in the arms of the one person who is the most permanent and most loving being you will ever have in your life – yourself.