Anxiety is such a pain in your day-to-day life. It blinds you to the point where you completely forget what you can do in order to reduce it to a minimum.
No rational thought comes through because the fear of those made-up scenarios is unbearable at this point. You can feel how it’s taking away your strength…
The more he’s slipping through your fingers, the more you try to hold onto him.
He’s the main reason for your anxiety. Even on days when you feel okay, one look or one wrong word can trigger you to the point where you’re losing your breath. He’s your biggest trigger.
Especially when he says that you’re annoying because you worry too much. He forgets that he has the power to make it all go away and that he can make you feel safe and sound.
He consciously chooses not to because he doesn’t care enough to give you what you need in order to feel like you belong right there next to him. The man who should love you unconditionally conditions you to hide your nervousness behind a smile, so he doesn’t have to deal with your emotions.
He doesn’t understand that all those nights out when he didn’t call you or text you, you spent them awake. You couldn’t sleep because you were so scared that he would find someone who didn’t make him angry all the time.
Your anxiety made you believe that you weren’t lovable enough which meant that he would leave you regardless of how much you tried. Your anxiety is whispering awful things to you and it doesn’t matter how much you’re trying to get it to stop.
It’s so persistent that you don’t even know if you have the power to fight against it.
When you come to him with this issue, you’re met with anger and a complete lack of understanding for yourself and your mental health. Is this really the man you want in your life? Is this really the person who should stay with you forever and keep you company on those lonely nights?
I don’t think so.
Your anxiety is telling you that no one will ever love you. You can even hear his voice in your head continuously telling you that you’re a lost cause. He says that you’re too much work, that you’re too emotional, and that you’re just overthinking.
He doesn’t understand that this is the worst thing he could ever say to you. It’s like he’s not even listening to the actual problem, but just creating an even bigger dilemma within your mind. Instead of calming you, he makes your mental health worse.
Whenever you think of him, you can actually feel the panic rise up within you. You don’t want him to leave, but listen to me when I tell you that you’re so much better off without him.
I know that it doesn’t sound plausible to you right now. You feel like he’s right and you’re the problem. He made you believe that, when in actuality he has no right to say such things to you.
You should know that a real man would never make you feel like you’re a burden just because you have anxiety. It’s a part of you that needs to be loved just as much as the rest of your body and personality.
Sometimes, it’s hard to see that. When you grow up around people who continuously degrade you for the fear of being abandoned, you start to believe their words.
But let me ask you this: do you want to waste the rest of your life next to someone like that? Do you want to feel your anxiety get worse because of someone who obviously doesn’t love you for who you are?
I know it doesn’t seem too probable, but there’s someone out there who would never treat you so poorly. Can you imagine a person like that? Someone so genuine will make you feel like everything is alright!
The guy who’s actually meant for you will never say that you’re annoying for being anxious. He will take his time to hold you and reassure you.
When you ask him where he’s going, he’ll tell you without adding that you’re being too nosy. This dream of a man won’t make you doubt him or his intentions because he’ll make sure to show you his love.
He’ll share his love for you with reckless abandon! You can’t expect this type of love from someone who believes that lukewarm affection is the equivalent of your fiery need for him. There’s nothing that can compare to your love for this trashcan of a man. Unless you find the right guy.
You’re trying too hard, without understanding that you’re enough just the way you are.
You’re trying to mask the shivers, the thoughts, and even the questions on the tip of your tongue. Your current boyfriend makes you feel like you can’t be open about the things that are bothering you or the things that your mind keeps on telling you.
Once you walk out of his life, he’ll understand what an amazing gem you actually are. The only issue is that it’ll be too late to change his behavior. You’ll already be in the arms of someone who understands the fears and the voices telling you that there’s something wrong with you.
The perfect man for you won’t let you go to bed without making sure that you feel safe and sound. He’ll make you understand that love isn’t conditional and that there’s nothing you can do to make him think you’re annoying.
He loves you, not despite your anxiety, but he loves your anxiety because it’s such a huge part of you. He loves it because it makes you the caring and loving person that you are.
So, stop blocking your own blessings by being obsessed with a guy who’s obviously not going to change his mind. He doesn’t love you for who you are, he just likes you enough to endure you. It’s hard to hear, but you know, just as well as I do, that I’m right.
At least give your heart a break until the right guy comes around. Don’t let anyone believe that anxiety is your own fault, because you can’t control something that’s been a part of you since the beginning of your existence.
You’re lovable even when your mind and this jerk tell you otherwise. There will come someone who’ll give his best to make you believe that. That’s exactly why you should never settle for anything less.