Your relationship broke down, you tried to fix it, and now you are considering whether you should try to set him free and see what will happen after that.
The question, “Will he come back to me if I let him go?” keeps wandering through your mind.
You listen to other people’s opinions, telling you that you should move on, that he’s not worth your time, but you just can’t help yourself.
Over and over again, you keep thinking that you two are meant to be but maybe he just needs some space and time to clear his mind.
Frankly, you think he is the only one who understands you and you are not willing to lose him without giving your best.
You still have hope that you two could make things work.
So, you decide to give it a chance. You let him go to see if he will come back.
But this is only the beginning. You can’t expect to leave him and that in a week’s time, he will magically appear at your door.
Will he come back to me if I let him go?
If you want to be sure that your question, “Will he come back to me if I let him go?” will give you a positive answer, you need to pay attention to certain details.
There are some things that need to be done in order for him to realize that you two are meant to be.
If you have the mindset of, “Oh, he will come back if I let him go,” without any change in your behavior, you will be left alone, maybe even more heartbroken than before.
If you want to succeed and get your relationship back on track, then read the following steps.
They can turn you from someone who desperately chases her ex into a woman he desperately wants back.
1. Cut off contact
One of the most important things that you should do when you want your ex back is to engage in the no contact rule.
This means that you should avoid any type of contact with your ex for thirty days.
No texting, calling, chatting, or DMing him. You can’t even send him a letter. That’s how strict you need to be.
This will help you stop chasing him and it will also help him realize what he has lost.
It will be hard but if you are willing to do your best to get your ex back, then you have to be persistent with it.
Do anything you need in order to stay focused.
Don’t trip up by calling him in the middle of the night, hoping that he will answer.
Instead, write notes all around your room that remind you that you shouldn’t contact him.
If you feel too weak, you should even delete his number, mute his notifications and erase all of his messages.
It will give him space that will make him realize that he misses you. This is what will work in your favor.
Stick to your goal and don’t let it fail. This is your first step toward getting him back.
2. Focus on yourself
This is your time to shine. You should focus on yourself and do all of the things you always wanted to do but never had enough time for.
Now, you have all the time in the world and you need to use it wisely.
From getting yourself back in shape to focusing on your mental health, you should do everything that will help you become a better person.
This part is not meant to only be a step that could help get him back to you but it’s a period of time that will help you realize your worth.
You will understand how much you have neglected yourself and you will have the perfect opportunity to fix that.
From now on, you will be a priority. You will fill your life with joy and things that bring you happiness.
Your confidence will rise and you will feel amazing.
(Plus, somewhere down the line, he will start to understand what he has lost and the answer to the question, “Will he come back to me if I let him go?” will start to unravel.)
3. Have fun
Instead of sitting alone at home, crying over him, you should start doing things that are more fun and that you always wanted to try.
Overthinking won’t help you, so set yourself free and start your journey to a happier life.
Call your friends and finally go on that road trip you’ve been planning for years. Now is the right time to achieve all of the plans on your wishlist.
You will enjoy the experience plus it will make him realize how much fun you are having without him.
It will show him that you’ve moved on and that your life didn’t end after he left. (And trust me, he will want you back.)
4. Don’t drunk-text him
Having fun will probably mean that you will end up on a partying spree with your friends and this will probably include a lot of drinking. RED FLAG ALERT!
Don’t ever let yourself drunk-text him. No matter how drunk you are, texting him in that state is a big no-no.
This will only show him that you are still thinking about him and all of the previous steps you’ve taken will be in vain.
Being desperate is not cute and it will never get him back to you.
It also ruins your plan of giving him some time and space as you are taking it away from him.
It shows that you lack self-control and that you can’t prevent yourself from looking desperate.
Social media consists of great places where you can post things that can make him realize how much fun you are having.
But you need to be careful with this. Use your posts sparingly and only share the usual number of posts.
Posting too much may suggest to him that you are trying too hard to make him notice you. That’s not your goal.
Instead, post photos and stories like you normally would, without looking desperate.
Give him the right amount of info that will tell him that you are perfectly fine even though you have broken up.
Also, don’t EVER share hateful comments, photos, or quotes that show him in a bad light.
They can only make you seem bitter and through them, you will lose any chance of getting back with him.
Would you get back together with someone who threw rocks at you or who showered you with words of hate? Of course you wouldn’t, so why would he.
Instead, give him just enough that will tickle his imagination and make him ask himself what is going on in your life.
“How is she doing without me?” is the question you want to evoke in his mind.
6. DON’T INTERACT WITH HIM ON SOCIAL MEDIA!
Just because you will be posting stuff there, it doesn’t mean that you can break the no contact rule.
It means that you shouldn’t give in to temptation and send him a message.
Just to be clear, no contact even includes not commenting on his photos. You shouldn’t do that either.
Another thing you shouldn’t do is scroll through his profiles, check who has commented on his posts, or search through his likes.
By doing that, you are planting a bug in your head that will make you think about him all the time.
This probably means that you will eventually make a mistake and your chances of getting him back will be ruined.
7. Make sure to always look your best
You never know when or where you could run into him and you don’t want to ruin that opportunity by looking like your world is falling apart.
Pull yourself together and make sure to look decent every time you leave the house.
It will improve your confidence and trust me, if you see him, he won’t be able to get you out of his head.
He will be asking himself questions, like, “Has she found another guy?” or, “Did she always look this good?” And honestly, this is what you want.
If you can make even a small impression on him, your mission will be complete.
The answer to your, “Will he come back if I let him go?” question will start to take shape.
8. Don’t chase him around the places he usually visits
You know him too well and you know the usual places he visits all the time.
Your first thought could be that you should go there and make him realize what he has lost.
No, no, no!
Chasing him around screams that you are desperate and that you are still thinking about him all the time.
Even if he starts developing an interest to contact you, if he notices that you follow him around, trust me, he will change his mind.
I know that you chase him because you want him to notice you but instead, you are sabotaging yourself.
You will be tired from running after him and he will be tired of seeing you everywhere he goes.
Again, by doing this, you are taking away his space, and that ruins your plan of making him realize how much he misses you.
9. Don’t try to be friends with him
As Pink once said, “Where there is desire, there is gonna be a flame.” And let’s be honest, you are burning with desire to have him back.
This would mean that there is NO CHANCE that the two of you could be friends.
A relationship can grow out of a friendship but it hardly works the other way around (especially when you are trying to get him back).
Don’t fool yourself by thinking that by staying friends, he will realize how good of a person you are and how much he misses you.
That’s not the way the cookie crumbles.
Imagine this situation and everything will be clear. You two stay friends and he finds a new girlfriend.
You aren’t able to hide your jealousy, his girlfriend notices and he decides that the best thing to do is cut off all contact between the two of you.
What do you get? Nothing!
That’s why you shouldn’t work on staying friends with your ex as it doesn’t help with your plan of, “He will come back to me if I let him go.”
10. Don’t talk badly about him
If you think that he will want to come back to you after talking badly about him, I’m sorry to say but you are wrong.
I understand that you are still angry and that you would love to get his attention but this is not the way to go about it.
Instead of talking trash about him, you should focus on letting him live the life he chooses.
Winning him back won’t be achieved by criticizing his life or his decisions.
But if you give him his space and time, the chances are that he will understand that he needs you back in his life.
11. Be polite to him
If, by any chance, you find yourself in direct contact with him, you should remember that you need to treat your ex normally, like nothing bad happened between you two.
Treat him like he is an acquaintance and like you have no history together. This will show him that you are not bitter but it will still hurt him a little.
You need to show him that you will not throw yourself at him, trying to get his attention.
Instead, you will be proud and he will start asking himself how you are remaining so calm.
Even if he starts provoking you with jokes about your relationship, you shouldn’t fall for that, but remain patient and let him be puzzled about your apathy.
12. Pretend you’ve moved on
Use every chance to show him that you are doing fine and that you’ve moved on.
Don’t let him see you suffering or struggling. Instead, let happiness radiate from your life.
You need to make him aware that his biggest mistake was leaving you when you let him go and the best way to do that is by showing him how good you have it without him.
I know that this means that you are playing games with his heart but it would be hard to get him back any other way.
If you want to continue with your, “He will come back to me if I let him go,” plan then you need to stick with it a bit longer.
When he sees how satisfied you are with your life, he will start thinking that he was the problem and he will want to get back with you as soon as possible.
Just wait and see.
13. Meet new people
Another great way to keep your mind off him and to have him be more jealous of your new life is by meeting new people.
I’m not talking here about meeting someone in a romantic way. Instead, I am talking about meeting new friends and changing things up in your life.
New people will bring something different and fresh and it will help you stop thinking about your ex.
You will have something new to focus on, which will help you cope with the breakup more easily.
Like with everything else you do for yourself, he will see how happy you are without him and he will wish to be a part of your life again.
This will mean that your plan is working and in no time, he will be knocking on your door, asking to make up.
14. Start casually dating again
Going on casual, ‘no big deal‘ dates can help you pull your ex back into your life.
He will at least be a bit jealous that you have met someone new. Especially if he’s still alone.
It will make him think about you and your relationship. Maybe he didn’t care enough, maybe he took you for granted, or maybe he didn’t put much effort in…
He still doesn’t know the answers to all of these maybes. It will seem like you are the only one who can give them him.
Also, this new guy you meet may be someone you actually want to try with and he may even help you forget about your ex.
Whichever way it turns out, you will be the one who profits the most and sometimes it’s good to be selfish.
15. Don’t make a scene if you see that he has a new girl
It is expected that he will start to experiment with girls a bit more.
Maybe they will be a way to get him to forget you or he is really willing to try with someone new.
No matter what the reason, you need to make it clear to yourself that you should never cross the line where you start making a scene if you see him with some girl.
Don’t call her rude names, don’t yell at him, and just generally don’t do anything that makes you look like a fool.
This will push him a million miles away from you, and that’s not what you want.
16. Always look happy in front of your mutual friends
There will be some times where you won’t be able to stop thinking about him.
You will feel like your world is falling to pieces but you don’t want anyone to notice that.
Instead, put on a fake smile and make him think that you are happy and satisfied with the way things are going, especially if you are in the company of mutual friends.
Trust me, some of them will tell him what you talked about, and how you are feeling right now; that’s for sure.
Because of that, you need to make them think that you are doing well and that you’ve never been happier in your life.
If any of them decide to tell your ex how you are doing, you want him to only hear positive words that will prove to him that you can live without him.
This way, he will get a bit jealous and your answer to the, “Will he come back to me if I let him go?” question will be on its way to you.
17. Don’t beg him to come back
If at any point you feel that you can’t play this game anymore and that you need to talk to him and beg him to come back to you, you are setting yourself up to fail.
Never beg for attention! That is rule number one.
No matter how low you feel, begging won’t help you feel better; it can only make you feel worse once he rejects you.
Even if he makes no moves and doesn’t show any signs that he wants you back, you shouldn’t beg him to change that.
No matter how much you love him, you always need to know your worth.
Begging for his love only decreases it and it makes you feel bad about yourself.
18. If you accidentally see him, don’t let him see that you are upset
If he sees that you are suffering because of him, he won’t think about going back to you; it can only make his ego grow.
That’s why you need to leave the upset face at home and wear a happy mask whenever you go out.
It will show him that you are not thinking about him all the time but that instead, you have moved on with your life.
19. Wait some time to reply
If he contacts you at any point in your plan of, “He will come back to me if I let him go,” don’t reply instantly.
It will send him the message that you have been sitting and waiting for his call.
Instead, let him wait a bit and let him think about what you are doing and why you aren’t answering him.
A little patience never killed anyone and if he’s willing to get back with you, he can wait a bit longer.
It’s not like you have been waiting for him to reach out to you, right?
20. Focus on opportunities
Sometimes, you just need some time to think about everything that happened to you.
You need to have a talk with yourself which will make you realize what it is that you actually want.
Maybe losing your ex wasn’t a bad thing; maybe it taught you more than you could imagine.
Instead of beating yourself up, you should focus on everything good that this breakup taught you. There may be more pros than cons than you realize.
If you want your, “He will come back to me if I let him go,” plan to work, you need to follow the steps listed above.
Let your ex have enough time and space to understand whether he wants you in his life again.
It’s important to not look desperate or be obsessive about him as it can only push him away.
I hope your, “He will come back to me if I let him go,” plan works and that you will find your happiness again.
Even if it doesn’t go the way you plan, it only shows you that you weren’t destined to be.
If he was meant to be yours, he would find a way back, no matter how hard it seemed!
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