It’s a great thing that you like to take care of your boyfriend. But that behavior might, unfortunately, create some problems in your future. Sometimes we just need to leave some wifey privilege until he puts a ring on it.
It’s not necessarily something you should be afraid of, but I just want to share some things that might happen if you start acting like his wife too early. I’m sure that some of the things I prepared for you will sound a bit surprising, but don’t worry; I’ll explain everything.
So, are you ready to hear about the small destroyer of relationships? I bet you are. Let’s go!
What not to do while you’re still in the dating phase
When we’re in a relationship, we tend to do everything to impress our partner, especially in the early stages. And sometimes we get so used to doing certain things that it would feel wrong to stop them. But if we’re the ones who take care of everything in our relationship, our partner might get too lazy.
The thing that girlfriends usually start doing first is cooking for their boyfriends. In the beginning, we’re usually very confident about it, like that cake all your friends rave over or that special family recipe your grandma passed down to you. But then it progresses to making him his favorite lunch too often.
Or maybe your boyfriend says he doesn’t have enough time to clean around the house. So you start doing that for him too. Every now and then you go to his place to wash his dirty dishes and clothes, or you vacuum and clean his windows. At the end of the day, he’s left with a perfectly clean apartment.
It’s possible that you also think everything you have is also his. It’s adorable and I’m sure it makes him feel special. However, you should be aware that your money is still your money. Your things are still yours.
As harsh as it sounds, he’s “just” your boyfriend. And it’s not your obligation to make his every wish come true.
It’s very nice of you, but all these things might end up causing problems later down the road. And they just scream wifey privilege. I know you’re probably confused because all of them are very sweet gestures, right? Don’t worry; I won’t leave you hanging. Here’s why these things can mess up your relationship.
1) You’ll spoil him too much
If you’re doing all these things for your boyfriend, you might make a problem for yourself and your relationship. It’s not something people talk about often, but it can easily destroy your future plans if you’re not careful. And here’s why.
If you constantly clean for him, make him special meals, share all of your income, and make everything about him, you risk spoiling him too much. It’s like when you let your kids do whatever they want and you end up raising some pretty spoiled people.
2) He won’t put any effort into the relationship
Think about your relationship with your boyfriend. Who puts more effort into it? I’m sure he does fine too, but if you’re doing most of the things mentioned above, then it looks like you’re the one who’s trying way too hard.
It’s a great trait to want to make your partner happy. All of us should aim to do that. However, trying too hard might make him stop putting effort into your relationship.
Yes, you need to show him you care. But you still need to leave some things for when the two of you are married. These things are what I like to call wifey privileges; they shouldn’t be mixed up with girlfriend privileges.
3) He feels too secure to even propose to you
Everybody knows that if you’re in a happy and healthy relationship, you’ll probably get engaged and then married after some time. It’s just how things go. Some people like to date for a longer period of time, while some boyfriends like to propose pretty soon after realizing she’s the one.
However, one non-negotiable with guys about proposals is that when they do propose, you’re definitely theirs forever. And the catch is, if you’re doing all these things for him, there’s a possibility that he’ll feel too secure to even bother proposing to you.
He’s so sure that you’re his girl forever that he’s just postponing the proposal for as long as he can. And I’m pretty sure that that’s not what you want.
4) He might find it annoying
No matter how weird it sounds, some guys really find it annoying. While they love to be well taken care of, they still consider certain things to be wifey privileges.
Sometimes all the things you’re trying so hard to do, just don’t help your relationship. Instead, they just make him feel like you don’t respect his personal space.
And some guys are really strict about their personal space, so they might find it even disrespectful. When you think about it, it’s not that difficult to understand that someone may get mad if you were there to clean every corner of their room.
I hope you now realize that not everything we consider to be a good thing is actually good for us. If you recognized yourself while reading this, I advise you to think it over a bit.
I’m not saying you should stop working hard on your relationship; I’m just saying that you need to learn how to create a good balance between what you give and what you receive.
That’s how you’ll forge a great relationship – and when the time comes and he puts a ring on it, you can use all this wifey privilege to your heart’s content!