There’s been a very silent war going on in this world and it’s been happening all around us. We never realized just how much it affected every woman out there.
When we, as women, grow up, we are raised for male approval. From the moment the male gaze has made itself a home in our own minds, we can only see ourselves through that filter.
Because of that, we grow up comparing ourselves to other women. It’s hard to understand the correlation between these two things, but hear me out!
You compare yourself to other women through the male gaze that lives inside of you. You look at yourself and other women like a man would look at you.
It’s something we have to unlearn, especially when we’ve been raised in a misogynistic household.
We’ve been conditioned to believe that we don’t have worth until it’s been confirmed by a man. Men lead the game and we’re conditioned to believe that we need to follow that same belief system.
So that’s what makes us compare ourselves to other women.
How many times have you seen a man you’ve been crushing on with another woman and you thought that you weren’t enough?
You scanned her body from head to toe, analyzed the things he might find attractive about her, and then compared yourself to her.
How many times have you compared yourself to another woman at work?
At least once, you’ve thought that another woman got her success from the way she looked.
It’s pretty privilege, right? The prettier you are, the easier you have it in this world.
You see, things like that are very dangerous to think, especially if you believe that you, yourself, are a strong woman.
Most of the time, you do this subconsciously. Who’d want to compare themselves like this and suffer this much?
You see a husband buy his wife flowers and you wonder why you’ve never gotten flowers from your spouse.
You compare a woman’s relationship with her parents with your relationship with your family.
At this point, it’s so hard to unlearn such toxic behavior but you should want to live your life without ever comparing yourself to anyone.
However, we are taught to compare ourselves to others.
Did you have a neighbor when you were a child? She was probably who your mom would always compare you to.
Why can Katie get those amazing grades while you can’t? Look how feminine Katie looks, why can’t you be more like her?
It’s scary because these people make us feel unworthy of love and affection.
You hated Katie because your mom seemed to obviously like her more than she liked you.
However, you can’t blame your mother for this, because she was taught to compare herself to others as well. She didn’t know any better.
But what no one tells us is that we’re enough just the way we are and that comparing ourselves to others only makes us more bitter.
Just because all your female friends are married or have children already, and you don’t, it doesn’t mean that your life is any less beautiful.
You’re working on yourself in a way that makes you feel good.
Comparing yourself to other women makes you grumpy or mad at them for achieving something you want.
You stop thinking of yourself as worthy because someone else seems more worthy than you are.
She seems happier than you, she seems more successful and more loved than you are.
You focus so hard on her life that you don’t have time to focus on yourself.
You’re so consumed with being as good as another woman or even better than her.
We all forget that the only person we need to compare ourselves to is our own self and our own progress.
When you look back at who you were a year ago and who you are now, those are two completely different people.
You’re stronger now, you’ve learned so much, you’ve cut off so many toxic people, and you’re on the right path to becoming the amazing woman you always wanted to be!
Just because we’ve been taught that we need to be better than other women just to get more approval from men, it doesn’t mean that we can’t change that.
Even if you think that we aren’t doing it for male approval, then you need to dig a little bit deeper into your conscious.
All your insecurities are exactly because of men and you won’t be free until you completely walk away from that mindset.
Instead of being angry at other women, we need to uplift each other.
There’s so much we can learn from each other.
We waste so much time hating the more successful women or the prettier women that we forget how much we need each other.
We can’t rely on men to keep us safe or to keep us sane. The only people we can depend on are other women.
Other women are our friends because we need to be able to support each other. There’s enough space for all of us in this world.
This isn’t some contest we have to win. Life is so beautiful and we have to live it fully.
You only have one life, so don’t regret the decisions you make.
Instead of hating on another woman, thinking that we’re ‘too much drama’ or anything like that, hang out with all types of women.
Never let anyone make you feel insecure.
When you’re confident, life will get so much better and you’ll see just how loving and caring women can be to each other.
Just remember that other women are never the enemy. We’re here to love each other and support each other.
We’re here to show the world that they can’t turn us against each other.
You’ll make such a difference in your life when you realize that you’re more than enough.
You’re worthy of love and affection. You’re worthy of absolutely anything you can imagine.
So stop comparing yourself to other women.