I get it. Things didn’t work out between you and me and I’m fine with that.
It happens and there’s nothing that I can do about it. I don’t blame you for breaking up with me because sooner or later, someone had to do it.
When two people aren’t meant to be together, there’s nothing you can do to change that.
Things will always end up as they’re destined to. I don’t disagree with that.
I also get that once we ended our relationship, you found another girl and you decided to try your luck with her. I’m fine with that too.
There’s no point for you to not date anyone when our relationship is clearly over. Neither you nor I have any intention of getting back together.
So, I have nothing bad to say about the fact that our relationship failed, or that you’ve moved on and found someone else.
That’s all part of God’s plan.
Still, there’s one thing that bothers me. There’s one thing that makes me sad when I think about it.
And no matter how hard I try to get it out of my mind, it simply isn’t working. It’s stuck in there and I can’t ignore it.
Why does the next girl always get everything the previous one asked for?
I get it – we weren’t a perfect match but I don’t get it that you’re able to give her everything I had always asked you for.
You always failed to deliver all of the small things that meant a lot to me.
Instead of making them happen, you made me feel that I was asking for too much.
You never bothered to write me an ‘I love you’ note even though you knew how much it meant to me.
It was always too much effort and you couldn’t see the point in it.
You never bothered to support my hobbies or take me shopping.
Instead, you led your life while I led mine, and you hoped that those two would never overlap.
You never told me how good I looked in a new dress and you never bothered to say, “Hey, you look beautiful.”
Now, I look at you and your new girl and I see how much attention you pay to everything she wants. You’re always showing her how much she means to you.
When I asked you to do it for me, you always told me that it wasn’t what you did. You were a tough guy, I suppose.
At least, you were with me…
And look at you now. You’re taking her on cute dates and you’re making all of my fantasies come true with another girl.
She’s getting your attention the way I always wanted it. She’s getting freshly picked flowers and her favorite candy.
All I ever asked for, you gave her. All I ever wanted, you gave her.
So, if you want to know, that’s the only part of our failed relationship that hurts me.
That’s the part that makes me recreate our relationship in my head, even though I don’t want to do that.
The fact that she’s getting everything and I got nothing. Not even a single goodnight text.
I remember how I begged you to put yourself in my shoes and think about the way you treated me.
I begged you to sometimes show me that I still meant something to you. That I was still an important person in your life.
I begged you to use actions to support your words but it never worked out.
And don’t think that this is jealousy speaking from within. I’m not jealous of her.
I wish you all the best and if she’s the right one then I want you to succeed.
But I’m jealous of everything she’s getting without asking for it, while I spent my time with you hoping that one day I would wake up and you would surprise me with some cute, meaningful act that would instantly make me smile.
I hoped that one day I would wake up and you would show me that you respected me and that you appreciated everything I was doing for you.
I hoped that one day something would click in you and you would start treating me differently.
But that day never came to me. Instead, it went to the next girl and bypassed me completely.
She gets the cute dates, flowers, and appreciation, while I got none of that.
The only thing I got was this sad thought that’s been going through my mind all the time since I saw everything you’re doing for her.
I’m fighting to let go of it but it’s not working. I’m begging this thought to leave my head and let me move on with my life but I can’t.
It’s bothering me too much to let go of it that easily.
And you know what else hurts? The idea that maybe I never got anything from you because I wasn’t good enough.
I admit it – I’ve been thinking about that too.
If she got everything that I always asked for, maybe the problem was in me.
Maybe I wasn’t good enough for you but you had no idea how to tell me that.
So, you tried to show it by making me see that I wasn’t worthy of the things I wanted.
I know that I’m overthinking and that you probably realized after our breakup that you never knew how to show love, but these thoughts are killing me.
If I could sit with you and ask you only one thing, it would be this: Why does this next girl get everything I ever wanted?
I would want to hear your explanation. Maybe it would show me that the problem wasn’t in me.
Maybe your words would comfort me when you tell me that it’s because you decided to change your behavior.
A ton of ‘maybes’ but nothing to help me solve my dilemma. And I know that I’m not the only one, as almost every guy does the same.
They don’t give anything to the previous girl but shower the next one with all the things the previous one always wanted.
Why? Maybe we’ll never know, but I bet that question will haunt us.
Why does the next girl always get everything? I hope that I’ll find out.