Walking away from any type of situation hurts like hell. Even the times you know that you’re doing it for yourself, there’s still a part of you begging you to stay.
Then you can imagine how hard it is to walk away when you know that you’ve been manipulated, but you still believe that you love him.
He treated you as if you needed to get your entire personality changed and re-arranged to fit his needs. And he was pretty darn good at making you believe that you wanted those changes as well.
He manipulated you into believing that jealousy was love.
Only a man who doesn’t know how to love you properly will overload you with his jealousy. He can’t love himself, so he made you choose him over everyone in your life.
Every single one of your friends was a threat to him. Whenever you’d spend time with them, he thought they were filling your brain with weird stories. He couldn’t control your friends and that made him extremely paranoid.
Not to mention any men around you. He wouldn’t make a big deal out of it, he wouldn’t go as far as to verbally assault you because of it.
But he would use persuasion to get you to stop talking to your male friends. He’d make you stop seeing them and texting them because he was convinced they were all just trying to take you away from him.
A man that insecure will disguise his jealousy as love and completely deny how toxic his behavior is.
He told you that he wasn’t controlling, but that he cared about you.
When someone cares about you, they don’t try to intervene in the decisions you make! People show their love through physical affection and emotionally cheering each other on in life. They don’t show it through controlling behavior.
You thought about leaving multiple times, but you’d always remember that he was the one who made the decisions in your relationship. A loving and caring partner wouldn’t do that.
He taught you that manipulation is love, when in actuality, the biggest sign of love is to trust you to make your own decisions.
Of course, we can always share our standpoints on certain matters, but that doesn’t mean that we have the right to make decisions for our partners.
Walking away hurts when you’ve grown used to his controlling behavior. It’s been a very long time since you’ve made a decision without first getting his stamp of approval.
And you know that he wouldn’t be too pleased with this one.
He made you believe that no one could ever love you better than he could.
When you’re in a relationship with someone who believes that their God’s gift to humanity, it’s hard to see past that. Sometimes, we see the red flag right away, but sometimes the signs are not that obvious.
You realized that he manipulated you into believing that this was love a little bit too late. Now you believe that you will never be loved again. You maintain that if he ever left you, you’d be completely alone on this world.
Because who could love you better than he could? You believe that now with your whole heart. How are you supposed to leave when your mind and heart are working against you?
He gaslighted you into thinking that you were nothing more than crazy for experiencing your emotions.
When you get gaslighted, you don’t trust your own feelings and intuition. You told him that he hurt you, but he said that he didn’t. He said that he did it out of his pure love for you.
Then why does it still hurt this much? Why does it feel like you’re deceiving yourself when you believe him?
You’ve been gaslighted into believing that there’s nothing lovable about you
Walking away from a relationship like that hurts. You still believe his words, they still echo in your head, but you know that you’re doing the right thing for yourself.
Manipulation is not love. Forcing you through his tone and words to do things you never wanted to, is not love.
If he truly loved you, he’d acknowledge your emotions, let you express them, and then try to make things right. But that’s not him. Whenever you’d feel something that didn’t suit him, he slayed you for it.
That’s when you realize just how much walking away hurts because you’ve been manipulated into believing that this was love. You thought that he loved you more than anyone ever did.
He told you that he understood you better than anyone, but you felt like you could never do anything right. You felt like he would always have something to change in you.
Now, you really want to leave, but how are you supposed to do that when you don’t know who you are without him?
Love should be unconditional. Love should remind you that you are enough just the way you are.
When someone loves you, it doesn’t feel like you’re suffocating. He can’t love you and then manipulate you into being anything but yourself.
You love him for who he is – you’d never invalidate his feelings. You love him – you’d never make him feel like he’s not enough for you.
There no way you could ever tell him that he could and couldn’t do something. You’re not there to control him, but to love him. So why can he do that to you?
You need to choose yourself and walk away from someone who can’t keep you around without manipulating you.
If he didn’t manipulate you into staying near him, would you still stay?
You have to leave and choose yourself. When you walk away from him, it will hurt, but you deserve to do that for yourself! You deserve to make that decision and leave him behind.
I know that you believe that he’s the one for you. But think about it for a moment.
You haven’t felt like your authentic self in so long. Just the fact that you’re so scared to leave, him even though he’s obviously manipulating you, shows that you need to walk away as soon as possible.
Because he isn’t the love of your life. There’s love that’s much more beautiful in this world and you’ll find it.
You might not see it right now, but it’s out there. You will find the love of your life in someone who will appreciate every little part of you.
He’ll show you that he can love you for exactly who you are, and never feel the need to lie to you or gaslight you.
You deserve that type of love. Even if walking away hurts right now, the pain will pass. You need to walk away to be able to see things clearly and free yourself from his grasp.
Or you will never learn what true love really is.