We’ve heard a lot of flimsy excuses cheaters use – some of them are so ridiculous, we can only laugh at them. I honestly admire how creative people can be.
While reading up on these excuses, I realized that I still have so much to learn. I’m no relationship expert, but I hope that, if you’ve heard some of these, you’ve told him to cut the crap and never speak with you again (it would be perfect if there was a slap involved, but I’m not going to promote any kind of violence).
Anyway, I hope you’re ready to have a good laugh and learn something new in the process. Oh, and please, don’t fall for these if you hear them. You can give the guy credit for creativity, though.
Top 10 worst excuses cheaters use
It was a rather difficult task to choose only 10, but I somehow did it. I hope you’re as curious as I was before writing this article. So, do you want to know what are the most common awful excuses used by cheaters? Keep reading!
1. “She reminded me of you, I couldn’t help it.”
Her hair color, smile, or figure simply reminded him of you. Because of how much he’s attracted to you, he couldn’t help but be with her. What’s the problem? It made him crave you less and now he can actually wait to see you.
What does rolling one’s eyes look like in written form? I’m doing it right now and I want to convey the message properly.
2. “We were on a break.”
This one became popular when Ross from Friends used it. Well, the jury is still out on whether they were, right?
People usually don’t understand the whole concept of a break – or they don’t communicate it well – so these “mishaps” can actually happen. I’m not approving it at all, but before you judge, make sure you laid down some ground rules in the first place.
3. “I was intoxicated, I don’t remember anything.”
I think this is one of the lamest excuses ever. Who still believes this?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that this can’t be true. Unfortunately, we live in a crazy world and horrible things can happen. Somebody can slip you something in your drink even if you’re really cautious. But if you’re sure that he’s just making an excuse, dump him.
4. “It didn’t mean anything, I love you.”
Yeah, right. He loves you, yet he chose to cheat on you. Please, don’t buy this one.
5. “I was just trying to help her.”
He was trying to be a good friend. She was devastated after her breakup and he decided to help her to forget about her ex. Maybe she can return the favor now?
6. “I missed you.”
You were on vacation with your girlfriends or on a business trip, and he missed you a lot. He badly wanted to be with you, so he chose the first girl that gave him permission to touch her. What the hell is he talking about?!
7. “I had to make sure you’re THE one.”
So he had to cheat on you with a couple of girls to confirm that his feelings for you are genuine?!
8. “It was just a bet.”
“You know baby, we were out clubbing and my friend bet me I couldn’t get the number of this one girl. He was mocking me, saying I don’t have what it takes anymore. I had to prove him wrong, but she took it too seriously and one thing led to another…”
I know men can be childish from time to time and challenge each other, but what kind of friends does he have if they dare him to cheat on you to prove something?
9. “How can I know you didn’t cheat on me while you were away?”
Bam, let’s blame you because I cheated. Perfect, isn’t it?
Don’t let him project the guilt onto you. If he doesn’t trust you while you’re away, and he clearly doesn’t respect you, you’re better off without him.
10. “It wasn’t me!”
Then who was it, your twin brother?!
And the list goes on…
–“It won’t happen again.”
–“It’s her fault, she approached me.”
–“It’s not a hickey, I hurt myself shaving.”
–“It was an escape from the problems we have. I should’ve talked with you instead.”
–“I wanted to try something new.”
–“It just happened / I didn’t plan it.”
–“I didn’t want to hurt you.”
–“I was working late.”
–“You weren’t giving me attention.”
–“You weren’t supposed to find out.”
–“At least I told you. Most guys aren’t honest with their partners.”
–“I needed to regain control over my feelings because I love you so much it scares me.”
–“I kissed her out of habit.”
-“I didn’t want to, but she convinced me.”
–“You gave me too much freedom.”
–“Everyone does it, it’s no big deal.”
–“She was flirting with me, I couldn’t resist.”
–“It was a mistake.”
–“I thought we were in an open relationship.”
–“I don’t know why she’s texting me this much.”
Why you shouldn’t fall for any of these excuses
Honestly, why should you? He’s trying to minimize the effect the whole situation has on you and your relationship. Not only that he wasn’t honest with you, but he shows no respect at all for what you two have. Do you really want to continue with someone who thinks so little of you?
I hope that you won’t hear any of these, but if you do, please just laugh it off. He very clearly isn’t worth you, your time, or your love that you wanted to give him. Try not to catch feelings for him until you know that he’s genuinely interested in you.
However, if you do hear one (or more) of these pathetic excuses, make sure he knows what he did and how serious the situation is. Surviving a breakup, especially if you were in a long-term relationship, is going to be difficult, but I know you can do it and will be better off afterward.
I always imagined that cheaters have little notebooks where they write some of these in-case-they-get-caught sentences. Well, if that’s the case, this is the perfect time to burn his book of excuses, don’t you agree?