No one expects their perfect, fairy-tale relationship to turn into an abusive one.
You get stuck in an abusive relationship to the point where you feel him pulling you back into his little games even when you’re fighting hard against it.
You have probably tried many times to escape this relationship. Your gut is yelling at you to walk away and find your own happiness far away from him.
But your heart is scarred and broken. Your heart isn’t able to handle more pain and the healing process seems like a very long one – a journey you might not be able to make.
You know that you’ll break down the very moment you walk out of his life and you’re not really sure if you’re ready for that level of pain right now.
When someone goes through these traumatic experiences, it can be very hard to choose themselves over their partner. Their partner has become the center of their world. It doesn’t happen on purpose, it happens because that’s how abusers program you.
He made you believe that it’s always your fault. He made you believe that it was never his own doings that were wrong, but your choices.
When you’re in a relationship with someone who thrives on abusing you emotionally and physically, how do you choose yourself? He convinced you that you can’t leave him. He made sure you were extremely fragile.
You can already picture the exact moment you’ll tell him you’re breaking up with him. You can see that bloodthirsty anger of his reminding you that you were nothing more than a pawn in his own game.
Let me say this: You deserve so much better than the treatment you went through. I’m so sorry for all the trauma that you’ve endured and for the pain it caused you.
Now, when you look back at this relationship, you’re finally able to realize that he was never the one for you. From the beginning, he would try to control you.
He was possessive and jealous, but you brushed it off. You even thought that it was cute.
But after a while, it wasn’t so cute anymore. His jealousy would be the reason you wouldn’t leave the house for days. Even when you would go out, it would always be with him.
The abuse didn’t even stop when you tried your best to put on a mask of happiness. You tried to make him believe that you enjoyed his company and that his treatment toward you was justified.
At one point, you even believed that you didn’t deserve anything better.
When you’re in a relationship with someone who is constantly diminishing your worth, you start to trust their judgment. You didn’t want this to happen, but it unfortunately did.
He tells you that he was the one who turned you into a woman. You back down the very moment he starts telling you all the things that he’s done for you. It makes you feel bad to even think of walking away from him.
He does this because the thought of you leaving only makes him angrier. It makes him delusional and absolutely feral. An abuser can’t handle losing his victim because that’s when he loses every ounce of validation he gets from the outside.
He keeps you near because he knows that you are so much better than him. He knows that the very second you step out that door, his entire life changes.
And so does yours.
You’ll never again be the same person. You’re so much stronger now. You have a long road ahead of you, but it’s finally time to choose yourself over him.
It’s time to choose yourself. You’ve gone through so much trauma that it’ll take a while for you to heal, but it’s not impossible.
You’re probably thinking that your healing process will be so painful that it’s not even worth the try. However, it’s still way better than the abusive relationship you’re in right now.
So instead of waiting for a fairy godmother to come and save you, save yourself. You have everything you need right there in your own chest, so pick up your stuff and walk away from this man.
There are many women out there who are thinking about leaving but never do. They haven’t seen someone be successful at this – you could be the one person to inspire another woman to get out.
You’ve always had the strength to walk through fire and come out in one piece. You’ve been through so much in life already, so don’t let yourself get stuck in this one trial.
It’s important for you to finally choose yourself! Choose yourself and heal, so that one day you can be in a healthy and wholesome relationship.
I truly do hope that you’ll be able to realize your own worth and take your power back. Get that light back in your eyes and smile back on your face.
There’s so much more to life than suffering in a relationship that’s keeping you miserable and unfulfilled.
And for the record, I also hope you’ll never go back to him once you decide to leave. So many women out there relapse and go back to their abusers. They don’t know a life outside of being a victim.
When the day is right, when your heart has healed and your trauma is a distant memory, you’ll be able to fall in love again. When that happens, you’ll be happy with someone new and he won’t frighten you.
Your new love will do everything right. He’ll treat you just right, make you feel safe, and be sure to be extremely gentle with your scarred heart.
But that happiness waits for you on the other side of his doorstep. You have to choose yourself first and then your happiness will follow.
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