You never thought that you could love as much as you loved him. It’s true that you thought that this type of love only happened when you fell for the one and that’s what you thought he was.
You fell for him hard and your world turned upside down once you met him. His kisses and hugs were unmatched.
You were blinded by what you thought was his love and you failed to see his true intentions.
He was never there to genuinely give you affection, though. His touches were never out of love but out of lust.
You ignored every red flag that he wasn’t the right man for you. You believed that he was truly there for you, that your love was real, and even if he made a mistake, you decided to turn a blind eye because of love.
So you were addicted to him and his attention. At some point, he became a necessity to you and you couldn’t live without him.
Every time you had a bad day, you turned to him because you thought he was the only one who could make you smile. The only one who could bring sunshine into your life.
He manipulated you countless times but you realized that a little too late.
You always forgave him because you believed that he could change. And once he did that, you’d have it all.
You gave him space and you said that you had everything under control. Little did you know that you weren’t the one holding the keys to your heart – he was.
The worst part is that even now that you know all of this, you still aren’t giving up on him. You believe that you’re going to have your happily ever after with him.
You really are convinced that he’s your Prince Charming. All your hopes and dreams revolve around him.
You still imagine having a beautiful life with him so you’re praying and waiting for him to propose to you with the ring that you told him you liked the other day.
You believe that he’s just like any other man out there who’s unable to openly express his emotions. Deep down in your heart, you believe that he genuinely loves you but that sometimes he doesn’t know how to show you his feelings.
You dream that you’ll have his kids one day and that little house on the water that you always wished to have. It’s like you can smell the grass in the garden and imagine your beautiful children playing outside by the lake.
You have everything planned out but it’s all just a fairy tale. The one thing that’s missing is him – someone who has you in the palm of his hand.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t plan a future with you. He doesn’t feel the same way you feel about him.
He’s never going to commit to you, even if you want him to badly. He’s never taken you seriously because he never thought about marrying you in the first place.
You’ve always been his second choice, a girl he never prioritizes. A girl who goes to him whenever he needs an ego boost, a fun girl who’s always just a phone call away.
That is the reality and you’ve been deceiving yourself that you and he are going to be married one day.
Darling, he doesn’t see the tears in your eyes every time he mistreats you. He doesn’t see the pain that you’re hiding every time he utters a bad word to you.
There are instances when he doesn’t listen to you at all – and not by mistake but by choice. He purposely doesn’t listen to you because he doesn’t care about you.
Your emotions and needs aren’t that important to him. It pains me to say that but you know this all too well.
However, for some reason, you’re still clinging to him, chasing him, and believing in every word he says to you. You crave his attention.
You’re sitting right there telling him that it’s completely fine that he ghosted you for the whole day. As if you weren’t hurt by the fact he didn’t call or text you to tell you where he was or what he was doing.
You’re even understanding when he says that he was busy and then he left his phone at work once he left to go home.
You’re still making excuses, even though you know that he actually does all of that on purpose. But you’re just not strong enough to accept the truth.
So what happens? Your heart keeps breaking into a million pieces.
His words and behavior start to hurt you internally and yet you still believe he’ll change. But a man like him never cares enough to want to see you happy.
He’s never been there when you needed him, he’ll never see how amazing and beautiful you truly are, and he’ll most definitely give that ring to someone else. Maybe to someone who won’t love him the same way as you do but it will be enough for him.
He’s not someone who’ll bring you hot soup in bed when you’re sick. He won’t watch your favorite movie on a Saturday night and instead, he’d rather watch sports with his friends and leave you alone.
If you retaliate and tell him that he’s mistreating you, he’ll leave you in an instant. He’ll behave like nothing ever happened between the two of you and he’ll even cheat on you as soon as he gets a chance.
He’s the kind of a man who knows nothing about you but still wants you to prioritize him above everyone else. He wants it all without any intention of giving even the tiniest bit back.
Your love won’t be reciprocated but I know that the day will come when you’ll finally open your eyes and see things as they are. I know that you’ll figure out how little you mean to him.
At that moment, you’ll give the love that you have to the most important person in your life – YOURSELF!
And the right one?
He’ll come along when you least expect it. Once you feel you’re ready to embark on a new journey, that’s when God will send you the man of your dreams and that’s when you’ll know why it didn’t work with any of the other guys.