Think aloud
Argh, the age-old question that runs through the minds of countless women, “When will he ask me to be his girlfriend?” When you’re dating a man who’s a tough cookie to crumble, you might be on the fence about what to expect from him. What are the surefire signs he will never make you his girlfriend?
Whether you feel like you’re the only one putting the effort into the relationship or like you’re the only one thinking about the future, there’s a chance that you’re dating an emotionally unavailable man. When that’s the case, you’re likely going to end up breaking up with him rather than making things official.
Why’s that? While most men prefer to wait a little while before making the relationship official, that doesn’t mean that you’re supposed to date someone for months and months without ever talking about your future together or putting a label on your relationship.
We can’t stress that enough – there’s nothing wrong with wanting to know whether you’re wasting your time on someone who’s not serious about you. You have every right to know whether the two of you are on the same page. You have every right to demand answers and come up with a solution accordingly.
When you’re wondering how long until he asks you to be his girlfriend, there are a few signs to look out for that can give you a clue.
10 signs he will never make you his girlfriend
1. He doesn’t want to label things
While there’s nothing wrong with taking things slow and not labeling anything until you’re ready to commit to a relationship, there’s a place and time for everything.
When the two of you have been dating for a while and you feel like you’ve made your intentions clear, you deserve to know what you’re up against.
A man who doesn’t want to label things, commit to a relationship, or even talk about the rules and regulations of whatever the two of you have at that moment, doesn’t want to be with you.
Whether he’s lonely, on a rebound after a bad breakup, or on a quest to date every woman available, you deserve to know that. We suggest you arrange an open conversation where both of you can share what you expect from your relationship.
2. He doesn’t want to talk about the future
Whenever you try to see where the two of you are going, you feel like you’re talking to a wall. Whether he gets up and leaves, starts talking about something else or laughs at you for bringing anything up, he’s showing you one of the most common signs he will never make you his girlfriend.
A man who doesn’t want to be in a relationship doesn’t want to talk about the future – because there’s no future to talk about.
With everything that’s going on between the two of you, he still thinks that you’re not a worthy candidate for a relationship. We’d go as far as to argue that he plans on breaking things off the moment that you mention the possibility of making things official.
3. He isn’t interested in your life
When the two of you are together, you spend most of the time listening to him. Whether he’s ranting about something that happened at work, talking about his problems, or talking about something that doesn’t make sense to you, you feel like you’re always talking about him.
When you try to shift the conversation, you feel like you’re talking to a toddler. You’re pretty sure that he doesn’t care about anything related to you. He never asks you about your day, he never wants to talk about your past or your future, and he doesn’t make an effort to get to know you.
When you think about it, you don’t even remember the last time the two of you bonded over something.
4. He’s still active on dating apps
What better way to know that someone’s not right for you than to check whether they’re still talking to other women? We know that the two of you might not have had the chance to talk about whether you’re exclusive or not, but his talking to other women speaks volumes about how he feels about you.
When a man wants to commit to a woman, nothing is stopping him from deleting the dating apps, saying goodbye to all the other women, and focusing on building a relationship with the one woman who deserves his attention. When he doesn’t want to do that, though, he might not be ready to commit.
While there’s nothing wrong with not being ready to commit, there’s something to be said about a man who isn’t capable of having an open conversation and talking things through.
5. He hides you from his friends and family
When you notice that the man you’re dating doesn’t want to spend time with your friends and family or introduce you to his friends and family, you’re in a pickle. You’re probably dating a man who doesn’t see you as a serious contender for a relationship and doesn’t want to waste his friend’s and family’s time.
You wouldn’t want to introduce him to your circle if you didn’t think the two of you had a future together, right? You already know that he’s showcasing all the signs he will never make you his girlfriend – you’re simply hoping he’ll change his mind and start treating you with respect.
We suggest inviting him to meet your friends and seeing how he behaves around them.
6. He reaches out to you only when he needs something from you
We’ve all been there, right? You’re hoping to receive a call all day long. You’re making plans to get together after work although you can’t seem to get a hold of each other. You’re putting your plans with other people on hold because you want to be available when he reaches out to you.
But, there’s only one problem with that – he reaches out to you only when he needs something from you. Maybe the two of you are colleagues and he reaches out when he needs your help. Maybe you started seeing each other a few weeks back and he comes by your apartment only when he wants to get physical.
Whatever the case might be, you deserve better than that. You deserve someone who’s going to make you a priority and make time for you. You deserve a man, not a boy.
7. He doesn’t post about you on social media
We know that social media holds too much power over everyone, but that’s not the point. When the man you’re going out with doesn’t want to post about you on social media, doesn’t want to follow you on Instagram, or doesn’t want to engage with your posts – he doesn’t want to be with you.
When you think about it, it’s clear that he doesn’t want to be associated with you. Whether we like that or not, someone’s presence on social media can tell you a lot about that person. When you’re looking for one of the telltale signs he will never make you his girlfriend, look no more – you got it.
8. He doesn’t show affection when you’re around other people
Not everyone’s a fan of PDA, but that’s not what we’re talking about. When the two of you are hanging out with your friends, you might notice that he doesn’t want to hold your hand, sit close to you, or interact with you whatsoever.
You might notice that he acts differently when you’re surrounded by other people. You might even notice that he makes sure the two of you are never surrounded by other people. When someone doesn’t want to be seen with you, they make sure they’re never around you when they’re out and about.
Whatever his reasons might be, he’s clearly trying hard to make it seem like the two of you aren’t an item.
9. He doesn’t make an effort to spend time with you
We already touched upon that, but that’s what happens when someone doesn’t want to be with you. Sure, the two of you are (sort of) dating and you’re seeing each other outside work. However, that doesn’t mean that you’re headed toward a relationship – that means that you’re headed toward “something.”
Before you get your hopes up because your cute colleague from work wants to have drinks with you from time to time or stops by your place after a night of drinking, do yourself a favor and don’t.
Someone who wants to be with you will let you know that by making an effort to spend time with you, asking you out on a date, or arranging a fun weekend getaway.
10. He doesn’t want to have “the talk”
What better way to ruin a “situationship” than to have “the talk?” When you’re dating someone who doesn’t seem to want to talk about the future or talk about what you are to each other, know that you’re a rebound or a friend with benefits.
Serious relationships rarely start with one person plaguing the other to finally put a label on the relationship. Quite on the contrary, serious relationships start with both people being on the same page about what they want and who they want it with.
When he doesn’t want to have “the talk,” chances are he doesn’t want to have a relationship, either.