Think aloud
Sometimes you can get little signs that your partner doesn’t value you enough. Maybe he never pays attention to what you say. Perhaps he makes fun of you or compares you to others. Maybe he chips away at your spirit and you need to acknowledge the signs he thinks you’re not good enough for him ASAP.
Whatever you do, don’t blame yourself. Your partner should encourage you to step out of your comfort zone, make you a better person, and complete you in ways you didn’t even know you could be completed. Your partner should adore you and make you feel like you’re the only one for him.
What are you supposed to do when your partner does the opposite? You need to wake up. You need to pack your bags and leave. You need to figure out a way to value your own life more than you value your relationship. Once you stop being afraid to see the writing on the wall, you won’t need our advice.
When you make a mistake and end up with the wrong man, you don’t need to prove anything to anyone. You don’t need to stay with him because you’re afraid to admit you’re not happy. You don’t need to listen to his insults, find excuses for missed calls and texts, or belittle your existence. You’re better than that.
Now, we’re aware that most men pretend they’re obsessed with you at the beginning. He might be feeding you crumbs of affection to get you to stay. He might be telling you what you want to hear to get you to comply. We’re bringing you nine signs he thinks you’re not good enough to open your eyes.
9 signs he thinks you’re not good enough
1. He takes you for granted
We’ve all been there. Whether you’re spending all your time cooking and cleaning or trying to do everything right to ensure your little family can flourish, your efforts go unnoticed. You never get compliments. You never get flowers. You never even get a pat on the back and a “thank you.”
We’re sorry to say that but your partner’s taking you for granted. He doesn’t value the work that you do to keep the relationship going. He doesn’t see your efforts. He doesn’t care that you spend most of your day thinking of ways to get him to notice you. We can’t stress this enough – he doesn’t deserve you at all.
2. He compares you to others
Sure, there’s nothing wrong with your partner casually mentioning that he likes it when a woman dresses a certain way or encouraging you to take initiative and work on your self-esteem. When you’re with a man who values you, you don’t even question these things because you know they’re for your good.
So, you might not even think much of the fact that your partner keeps nagging you about dressing more as you used to when you were younger or wondering why you can’t be more like his friend Sarah who makes him laugh and doesn’t yell at him. Now, that’s one of the signs he thinks you’re not good enough.
3. He makes fun of you in front of others
Couples poke fun at each other all the time. Contrary to popular belief, though, there’s a fine line between teasing each other in private and insulting each other in front of others.
If your partner puts you down or insults your thoughts, actions, and beliefs, chances are he doesn’t think you’re good enough for him.
It could be as simple as telling you that you’re not funny when you’re trying to tell a silly story to your friends. It could be as serious as telling you that you’re going to fail when you announce that you’re thinking of starting a business.
When you look into his eyes, you will probably see an expression of disgust every time you try to talk about something important to you.
4. He swears he’s not ready for a relationship
“I’m not the relationship type.”
“I want to be with you, but I need time to think about the rules of our relationship.”
“I really like you, but I’m not ready for a relationship.”
Before you dumb anyone who dares say something of the sort to you, know that there are times when these claims are completely appropriate. When he tells you that he’s not ready for a relationship and that he doesn’t expect you to be okay with that, that means that he’s simply being upfront with you.
When he, however, says these things and proceeds to come by your apartment at 3 a.m. or ask you to hang out every two or three days – he doesn’t appreciate you. He wants to be with you while he’s waiting for someone better to come by. He wants to waste your time while he’s having fun on the side.
5. He doesn’t introduce you as his girlfriend
What better way to ruin someone’s confidence than to avoid telling anyone you’re with them? When you start to wonder whether your partner might be embarrassed by you or might think you’re not good enough, observe the way he talks about you when you’re with other people.
“Oh, I forgot to introduce you to my friend here, this is Samantha.”
“Samatha’s my colleague from work.”
“Samantha and I are friends.”
Samantha, you deserve better. If the two of you have already had “the talk,” there’s no reason why he wouldn’t be able to tell his friends and family that he’s been seeing someone. It’s about time you started putting yourself first and not letting these petty situations slide.
6. He ignores you in front of others
When the two of you are out and about, you get the sense that he doesn’t want to be seen with you. He walks in front of you. He avoids talking to you when you’re surrounded by people. He ignores you when you try to get his attention. What’s up with that?
We’d say that’s one of the most obvious signs he thinks you’re not good enough for him. If he refuses to hold your hand when you’re walking around the neighborhood or kiss you on the forehead when you’re sitting on a park bench, it’s clear that he’s trying to hide the fact that the two of you are together.
7. He doesn’t post about you on social media
Social media might not be the best way to figure out whether there’s something wrong with your relationship, but – there’s always a but when we’re talking about Facebook, Instagram, or even TikTok.
We can’t escape the fact that we live in a world where sharing little bits and bobs of your everyday life counts as some sort of way of announcing to the rest of the world “Hey, here’s what I’m up to.”
When you post a picture with your partner or share a cute little video of the two of you laughing together, you’re telling everyone that you’re a thing. When your partner straight up refuses to do that although you ask him to, you might want to consider having a serious conversation with him.
8. He never wants to meet you in a public place
Whether the two of you have been together for a few weeks or a few years, you might notice that your partner doesn’t want to hang out with you outside your apartment.
Whenever you get together, you watch a movie, hang out on the sofa, or go to a secluded cafe near your apartment where no one can see you. Oh, that’s suspicious, right?
Why wouldn’t you be able to go to a restaurant for dinner or take a walk down the busiest street? Why wouldn’t he prepare a picnic for the two of you or take you to do something fun on a Saturday morning?
Well, we hate to be the bearers of bad news, but that’s probably because he thinks you’re not good enough for him and he’s waiting for the right moment to break things off.
9. He swears he’s not a fan of PDA
Public displays of affection aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but a hug from behind and a peck on the lips are a tell-tale sign that the two of you are head over heels for one another. We understand not wanting to be all over each other while you’re waiting in line at Starbucks, but that’s not what we’re talking about.
We’re talking about holding hands when you’re walking down the street, hugging each other when you’re waiting for the light to turn green, or giving each other a little kiss on the lips when you think that no one’s watching.
We can assure you that there’s nothing wrong with that, no matter how hard he tries to convince you that it’s embarrassing for him to show you he’s in love with you. With that out of the way, though, don’t forget to reevaluate your relationship when you notice your partner repeating any of these signs.