Signs he is jealous but hiding it are always those minor details we forget to look out for.
You know your boyfriend. You know when he’s happy and what makes him smile harder.
There are so many things that you can spot without him even having to explain them.
You see right through him because you’re empathetic and you love him, so you pay attention to everything.
But what’s up with him these days? Every time you say something about a male friend, he seems to tense up.
You are questioning if he’s jealous, but every time you bring it up, he brushes your worries aside, saying that you’re imagining things.
You never thought that you would be the type of girl to ask permission to sleep over at a friend’s house.
You’re even questioning whether you should ask him if you can hang out with your friends at all.
Should you respond to that guy from work asking you for help on a project? Will your boyfriend get upset?
All these questions are running through your head simply because you can’t seem to shake off the feeling that your boyfriend has a case of the greenies.
You don’t want to hurt his feelings, but why is he avoiding talking about it?
If he continues to run away from this conversation, you’ll have to label him as possessive and controlling. And no one wants someone like that in their life.
On the other hand, he continues to tell you that you’re just imagining things. You’re pretty sure that you’re not overexaggerating.
Are there signs he’s jealous but is hiding it that you can pick up on?
Why do men hide their jealousy?
It’s a question every woman has asked herself at least once in her life: Why are men hiding their jealousy?
It seems like such a normal feeling to experience and it can be talked through if a couple really tries to understand each other.
So why is your boyfriend acting like a child instead of actually talking about this?
Before we start talking about the signs he’s jealous but is hiding it, let’s reveal the reasons why he’s hiding it in the first place.
There are a few possibilities, but we’re only going to mention a few of the main ones right now.
Every individual is different, so you may not know his exact reasoning behind it until you talk things through with him.
Here are the most common reasons:
– He doesn’t want to show you how much he’s bothered by it because it’ll mean that he’s giving you all the power.
– He’s scared that showing his feelings will make you think less of him.
– He doesn’t want to seem vulnerable and emotional, because “that’s for girls.”
– He’s scared that you’ll leave him if he reveals his true emotions.
– He’s insecure.
When you look closely into all of these reasons, all of them have the same end result and conclusion.
He is scared of letting you have the power over him. He thinks that you will misuse it.
We all know that men are taught to avoid their emotions, ignore them, store them somewhere deep down – just to explode at one point.
Signs he’s jealous but is hiding it
Lucky for you, me, and every girl out there, there are ways into the minds of men.
We can easily read through their behavior if we just pay close attention to the things they do or say.
You might find yourself in a situation where you’re mistaking jealousy for love. He doesn’t love you if he’s jealous.
Jealousy is a sign of low self-esteem and trust issues.
There is nothing romantic about it. It’s a toxic trait we all have to work on in order to know how to properly love and appreciate our partner.
So the next time he tells you that he’s doing things out of love, even though they’re a sign of jealousy, please pack your bags and leave.
That is a toxic man you have on your hand.
However, if you do find these signs to be relevant for your man and he wants to work on himself, that right there is a keeper and you should think hard about how you’re going to work on your relationship.
In order to find an explanation for his weird behavior, here is a list of signs he’s jealous but is hiding it:
1. He becomes distant when you do things without him
Sometimes it isn’t that easy to incorporate your partner in every single one of your plans. You want to hang out with your friends, it’s girls’ night out!
He doesn’t enjoy going to things you like, so you don’t even bother to ask him to come with you.
You know that he’ll just make you feel bad about enjoying the things you do.
With that said, he still gets extremely mad at you for not inviting him. The last time you invited him, he just kept on complaining!
When you get home, however, he acts like a little kid. He becomes extremely distant, keeps his sentences short, and avoids eye contact.
This is one of the signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
He doesn’t want to talk to you because he’s upset, but he also doesn’t want to tell you that he’s upset.
He just wants you to magically know what he’s so upset about. This will only happen when he’s jealous because you did things without him.
2. He forbids you to do things
I don’t think that I have to point out how messed up and possessive this is actually is.
He is doing this because he’s jealous and insecure.
His self-esteem issues don’t allow him to see clearly and he thinks that it’s okay to forbid you to do things.
It’s a clear sign of jealousy. How dare you do things that don’t involve him? How dare you be around other people?
His head is rationalizing his controlling behavior because he thinks that you’re “asking for it” when you’re wearing that pretty dress of yours.
That’s why he puts rules on you and expects you to follow them. It’s messed up.
He will excuse his behavior by saying that he’s doing it for your own good or because he loves you.
If that doesn’t work on you, he’ll say something along the lines of “If you carry on doing that, you don’t love me anymore.”
It’s very toxic and manipulative. Please know that.
3. He brings you down
Due to his own self-esteem issues and the jealousy he’s feeling because of how gorgeous and confident you are, he will try to bring you down as well.
He wants you to think that you really don’t have the legs to pull that skirt off.
Another example is when he tells you that you’re really not that good at something just to keep you away from that certain hobby.
I had a friend of mine who told me that her boyfriend convinced her she was bad at tennis so she stopped going to practice because of it.
She had such low self-esteem that she believed him and actually thought that it wasn’t something she should be doing.
After the breakup, she found out that he only told her that because he was jealous that she “jumped around in that tiny skirt around a male trainer.”
Instead of confronting her and telling her that he’s the problem, that he has self-esteem issues, he went out of his way to make her believe that she was bad at something.
This is one of the clear signs that he is jealous but is hiding it – when he avoids the actual issue and makes you feel like you’re the problem.
4. He has random bursts of affection
It’s adorable, don’t you think? When a man is so in love with you that he has these random bursts of affection.
Unless he is naturally an affectionate person who loves hugs and cuddles, you have the full right to be suspicious of his behavior if it drastically changes.
For example, you came back home after a night out with the girls and there he is throwing himself all over you.
If he’s usually someone who isn’t into much physical contact, this is one of the signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
He doesn’t want to talk to you about it, so he ends up cuddling into you for reassurance. This is his way to make sure that you still love him.
Yes, it is a sign of jealousy. He was racking his head about all the things you could be doing out there without him and he got insecure.
He is scared of losing you, that’s why he ends up buying you more gifts and showering you with affection.
5. He always points out when you’re talking about a man
How many times has it happened to you that you were just casually talking about something that happened at work and he would stop you to say that you mentioned a male coworker one too many times?
You could just be talking about something funny and accidentally mention any man, be it your male friend, a random guy that came up to you, or anyone else – he’ll still bring it up.
It’s getting pretty annoying. You know that those men aren’t as important to you as your boyfriend.
They are a part of your life, but you don’t see them as anything more than platonic friends.
It doesn’t matter how many times you reassure him, he continues to do this.
He will tell you that you mention a certain man too much or use a certain tone when he talks about them himself.
It’s just because he is insecure and thinks that those men might steal you away from him.
He won’t address the problem itself, he’ll just continue to point out whenever you mention another man.
6. He’s passive-aggressive
“Why don’t you go and ask Josh for advice? You seem to hang out with him more anyway.”
“How’s Dave doing? I mean, you should know, you two are always texting.”
“What do you mean I’m jealous? I just find it funny how everyone is more important than I am.”
Have you ever heard any of these lines? The cherry on top is when you ask him how he’s doing and he sarcastically answers “I’m fine.”
Instead of coming up to you and asking you about your actual intentions and your feelings, he’s being passive-aggressive.
He also won’t be the one to address the issue and tell you that he’s jealous. He’ll hide it until at one point he bursts and starts a fight.
If you have seen him be this passive-aggressive then you have probably asked him if he’s jealous.
He avoids the question like the plaque and tells you that you’re being delusional.
This is undoubtedly one of the obvious signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
7. He actually becomes physically aggressive
Another one of the more obvious signs he is jealous but is hiding it is when he doesn’t even say a word but goes straight for a punch.
He saw you talking to a man at a bar and doesn’t even wait to ask you who it is.
It might have been your brother, a co-worker you bumped into, your male friend.
It doesn’t even matter to him. He sees you talking to a man and he goes feral.
If you do confront him about it, he says something extremely possessive like “Guys can’t talk to my girlfriend” or something along that line.
He won’t just ask you who it is or if he’s actually bothering you, because he is too scared to hear your answer.
Instead, he will express his emotions the only way such men know how – through a punch.
I really don’t think that I have to sit here and explain to you why you should run for the hills if you have ever experienced this.
That man is definitely not boyfriend material and please leave. Now.
8. He’s constantly texting you when you go out without him
He says that it’s because he cares about you or is scared that something will happen to you. His text blow up your phone the entire night.
You can’t even enjoy yourself because you have to constantly tell him where you are, with whom, and what you’re doing.
This is one of the clearest signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
He is questioning where you’re at because he can’t deal with the thought of you having fun without him.
Just the thought that there might be men at the same place where you are is making him go crazy. That’s why he resorts to sending you text after text.
He just wants to make sure that you’ll still be there to talk to him. His fragile confidence needs that affirmation.
9. He shows up without an invitation
This is just another sign of a very controlling and jealous boyfriend.
Does he tend to show up to places he wasn’t invited to just to be near you?
He might say that he was just looking out for you, but when you look closer, you can see he’s just jealous.
This is his way of checking up on you.
He’s making sure who’s with you and if you’ve lied to him – it’s obvious by the way he keeps on looking around you when he arrives.
It’s exhausting when you have to explain to your friends why your boyfriend suddenly decided to show up.
When you do ask him to stop doing this, he accuses you of not wanting to spend time with him or being ashamed of him.
He doesn’t understand that you sometimes need time with your friends.
This is a man struggling to understand boundaries. He doesn’t want to admit that he’s jealous even though it’s as clear as day.
10. He flirts with other women (but only when you’re looking)
There are many instances when he’ll turn to these measures, but he’ll do this mostly when you’re out together and he sees someone hitting on you.
Even though you tell them that you have a boyfriend and the man leaves you alone, your boyfriend sees it as a threat and goes out of his way to flirt with another woman.
It doesn’t have to involve any physical touch.
Just the fact that he is giving her compliments right in front of you, that you know don’t have an innocent connotation to them, is awful.
He is so scared to lose you and get hurt that he hurts you in return.
When you confront him about it, you will see that he is teeming with envy. This is one of the most obvious signs he is jealous but hiding it.
He doesn’t want to confront you and his emotions, so he does the next best thing: make you feel worse.
Just a quick reminder that flirting is considered cheating because it’s always done with a certain intention. Just in case you forgot.
11. He starts giving you ultimatums
“Either you stop it or we’re over!”
An ultimatum is a final proposition. He is telling you that you only have two choices.
Your boyfriend is jealous but is hiding it behind the excuse that it hurts him to see you wear a certain piece of clothing or the fact that you have male friends.
That’s why he gives you an ultimatum. When you tell him that he sounds jealous, he just throws insults back at you.
If you tell him that you won’t play his twisted games, he accuses you of not caring about him.
It’s extremely exhausting and it won’t stop until you tell him that his jealousy isn’t cute and he needs to work on his self-esteem issues.
12. He sulks
Is he always bad-tempered and annoyed? Or is it just when you drag him to go out with you when he doesn’t want to?
He could have just as well sat himself down on the couch in his apartment, but the thought of letting you go out without him is baffling to him.
So when you do go out, he’s in an extremely bad mood.
He might even go as far as to try to get you to go home as soon as possible. He just wants to be in the safety of his own four walls!
There isn’t a moment that goes by where he doesn’t keep an eye out for guys around you. He has made it his life mission to keep them away from you.
This exhausts him and he’ll beg you to just go home already.
At home, he has your undivided attention and there’s no threat of someone else occupying you.
He wants you for himself and he’ll let you know that in the form of extremely childish behavior.
Instead of admitting that he’s jealous, he acts like a five-year-old. This is one of the clearest signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
13. He wants to breakup
This is not something that happens often. You won’t even recognize it as one of the signs of jealousy.
Out of the blue, he wants to break up the relationship and doesn’t even give you an actual explanation.
You might cry and plead with him, but he seems dead set on the idea.
His low self-esteem tells him that every man in your life is better than he is and that he doesn’t deserve you.
He is insanely jealous of them. I know it doesn’t seem possible, but it is one of the signs he is jealous but is hiding it.
You can’t always read your boyfriend’s mind. So if he doesn’t even want to talk to you about the issues he has, how are you supposed to work on them?
Make sure you know what’s going on. If he doesn’t want to talk about it, his jealousy is not your problem.
His low self-esteem can make your relationship very toxic.
Watch out for the signs he is jealous but is hiding it in order to keep your relationship healthy.