“Should I block my ex?” is a question most women out there have asked themselves after a breakup.
You’ve experienced heartbreak and it’s time to remove your profile picture with him and change your relationship status to single. It’s time to delete his phone number from your contacts and let your best friend know that you’re no longer in a relationship.
But is it also time to block him on Facebook, Snapchat, WhatsApp, and all your other social media profiles? Is it time to close this chapter by making a decision to remove your ex-boyfriend from your life completely?
It’s a tough question to answer, but a valid one nonetheless, especially since connectivity and social media plays a huge role in our lives nowadays.
To block him or not, that’s the dilemma you have to solve!
Should I block my ex? 5 sets of questions you first need to answer!
The post-breakup period is always rough. The one who used to be your whole world suddenly turns into a stranger.
It’s all come to the point where you’re thinking of blocking him, even though days earlier, you couldn’t imagine your life without him.
But before you make that final call and there’s no going back, you need to be sure that you’re doing the right thing. And sometimes, that’s easier said than done.
“Should I block my ex or is it a mistake? Maybe I should apply the no contact rule? And what if decides to get back together with me? How will he feel if he sees that I blocked him?”
A lot of time, you keep rerunning these questions through my mind as you have no idea what the right thing to do is. But before you decide to react and do what you think is best for you, you should first answer the following questions.
1. What’s it that you need?
It’s important to know what you need from this experience. Do you want to try your luck one more time or do you need to put it all totally behind you because it’s not making you happy?
The choice to block your ex is actually about trying to figure out what it is that you want. It’s about realizing what’s best for you.
Do you need more privacy, boundaries, or distance? Do you need to process what happened? Or do you need to stay friends? Do you need to stay connected to keep that part of your life alive?
It’s up to you to decide, but you first need to be sure of what you need.
2. Why do you wish to disconnect from your ex?
Together with this question are two follow-up questions: What would you get by staying connected? Will blocking him get you closer to or further away from what you really need?
If you feel like you could use some distance between you two, ask yourself if unfriending him will give you the separation you need.
If you instead feel like you need to understand what happened, will staying friends with him on social media help you to get the information you need?
And more importantly, will that information really help you get the closure you’re looking for?
Once you figure out the answer, you’ll be one step closer to knowing whether or not to block your ex. A mysterious dilemma only you know the right answer to!
3. What does unfriending him mean to you?
Do some self-reflection and figure out if your decision to block him is based on your fear that he will block you first. Or that you’re trying to show him you are angry because he isn’t answering your texts anymore.
If that’s the case, it might be better to communicate your feelings to your ex directly, because passive-aggressively expressing your anger by blocking him can lead to more frustration if he doesn’t get the memo.
4. What’s stopping you from getting what you need?
Does it feel a little too permanent to block him, even though you want more time and space for yourself? Perhaps it’s really hard to let go of the opportunity to feel included in his life.
Maybe you’re having doubts about blocking him because you still want to see what’s going on in his life or check if he’s moved on after you.
And maybe it’s these barriers that are preventing you from moving on yourself and starting the healing process.
5. How does your decision make you feel?
Our exes are a huge part of our lives. So, it makes sense that you’re having doubts about the right thing to do once your relationship falls apart.
On the other hand, you can’t expect someone to give you the answer to that horrid “Should I block my ex?” question as you’re the only one who knows how you feel about it.
When you imagine that you blocked him, do you feel inner peace, relief, or happiness that you made that call?
Or does your heart break a bit more the very moment you realize that you can’t scroll through any of his social media accounts anymore?
Once you explore how your decision will make you feel, that’s when you’ll know the right answer.
13 reasons why you SHOULD block your ex
I know you’re reading this precisely to figure out if you should block your ex, but unfortunately, I can’t be the one to give you a straight-up answer. That decision must come from your heart.
But I can objectively list all of the reasons why you should opt both for and against it. So let’s start off with the top reasons why you should block the guy out of your life.
1. Seeing him move on will hurt you
Let’s be honest. At one point in time, he’ll feel ready to move on, and seeing him do that while you’re still stuck in the same spot will hurt.
Your already broken heart will tear even more and you’ll feel as if your whole world is falling apart.
You’ll keep seeing pictures of him and his new girlfriend. They will be enjoying their new relationship while you cry yourself to sleep as you’re still unable to remove him from your heart.
Do you really want to put yourself in that situation? Do you want to keep cutting yourself on the ragged edges of your broken relationship while he enjoys his life without you?
If you feel the need to know about his life from time to time, you can always ask your mutual friends about him. It’s much easier to go that route than to surround yourself with constant reminders of how happy he is without you.
2. He cheated on you
“Should I block my ex if he cheated on me?”
I know that I said I won’t tell you what you’re supposed to do as it’s ultimately your call to make, but there’s always an exception.
In this case, if he cheated on you, there’s not much second-guessing to do.
He betrayed your trust, played with your heart, and decided to walk over you. As a result, you have no reason to keep him in your life anymore.
It’s obvious that he wasn’t the right person for you, and that fact won’t ever change. You shouldn’t give your relationship a second thought as he’ll probably make you go through the same pain again if you forgive him for his actions.
Once a cheater, always a cheater. End of story.
3. You know that nothing good comes from stalking
Once the relationship ends, it’s hard to move on from your old habits.
This guy used to be your whole world. You never went a day without hearing from each other and right now, you’re trying to figure out if you should block him.
You’re not really in an enviable position as we all know how hard it is to cut ties and start all over again.
But one of the reasons it could be good to block your ex is because stalking him won’t do you any favors. And we know that you’ll fall to the temptation at least once.
At one point, you’ll feel the need to see how he’s doing. You’ll want to know if he has a new partner and if he’s moved on.
Then, when you see that he’s happily in love and that probably not even thinking about his past relationship, your heart will sink and you’ll feel devastated.
But if you block him, you’re saving yourself from all of that pain. You’re letting yourself start clean, without any ghosts from the previous relationship.
And that’s certainly a better path to take.
4. He’s trying to pull your heartstrings
If you notice that your ex is trying to play mind games with you, then you should really think about blocking him.
Maybe you’ve noticed a whole lot of negative posts on his feed that show his clear intention to hurt you. Maybe he’s trying to trash-talk you, or bombarding you with pictures of his new girlfriend.
Even after you decided to unfriend him, his mean and nasty comments kept reaching you through mutual friends.
The truth is that he knows what he’s doing. It’s not a coincidence as he’s probably intentionally trying to hurt you. Especially if you had a messy breakup and didn’t really end on good terms.
In that case, he may try to do whatever he can to bring you down. And if he can stoop that low, then there’s no reason to give blocking him another thought – just do it already.
He doesn’t deserve better than that, and he’s shown you that through his immature behavior.
5. He’s toxic
If your ex was toxic, then you have a really good reason why you should block him.
At first, he probably seemed like the love of your life. He showed himself in the best light and there was literally nothing you disliked about him.
But as the ball unraveled, you realized that he’d been wearing a mask the whole time and the face of a devil was hiding right underneath.
If he’s been controlling, jealous, or abusive, then there’s nothing that stops you from blocking him. The two of you are over and there’s no reason to let him into your life in any capacity whatsoever.
He’s that kind of person who’ll look all nice and kind on the outside, while a mean figure is hiding underneath his disguise.
In this case, don’t hesitate to block him as it’s obvious that keeping him in your life won’t bring you anything good.
6. You want closure
When you’re in desperate need of closure, it may be a good idea to go ahead and block your ex. You need to close this chapter in order to move on, and you know you won’t be able to do so if he’s everywhere around you.
When you wake up and unlock your phone, his face, words, and pictures from his life follow you, no matter which app you open. And you know that you won’t ever be able to heal if that keeps on happening.
In this case, blocking him will help you get the closure you need. It will help you move on and make a fresh start.
And if that’s what you need, then you should make that possible for yourself.
7. You want to stop the break-up and make-up cycle
Another reasonable reason why you should block your ex is that you know it’s the only possible way to keep you from reaching out to him.
The two of you tend to forever break up and then get back together again, and you want that to stop. You’re sick of going back and forth while always ending up in the same spot.
One day, your relationship is over, while the next, you want to get your ex back. This behavior is toxic and stops you from healing properly.
Since you’re used to having him around, you always find a way to go back to him. But in the end, nothing good comes from it.
You always break up for the same reasons and get back together out of same old habit.
In order to put an end to that, you need to decide to cut contact completely. Once you block him, he won’t have a way to directly reach out to you and that can be your first step in finally moving on after him.
8. Ignorance is bliss
Knowing about your ex’s activities after the breakup will only make it harder for you to move on with your life.
Opening WhatsApp will get you texting again. Liking his Instagram picture will make you reach out to him.
That’s why you need to resist the urge. You need to give yourself some time and space to heal and finally move on with your life.
Do you really need to know what he was doing with your mutual friends the last time they partied? Unfollow him before you see all of their comments on how he’s better off without you.
9. You want to avoid accidental messages
You’ve said yourself a million times that you won’t text him. Then, after a couple of drinks or hearing your favorite song, suddenly your promise to yourself flies out the window.
You texted your ex-partner “accidentally” and the moment you hit the sent button, you regretted the decision.
To prevent yourself from texting and calling him when you really know you shouldn’t, rather block your ex. In this case, it’s the best decision you can make as it will save you from all the self-inflicted embarrassment and unnecessary pain.
10. You know that you can’t stay friends
After some time, being Facebook friends will probably get you to communicate again. And if you get in touch, chances are high that you’ll try to reignite the spark between you.
But both of you know that you can’t be just friends as there are too many hidden emotions between you. You also don’t want to be a couple again since there’s not enough love.
So, what’ll happen is you’ll end up having a casual fling, which you’ll regret the morning after. And that’s not something you want.
To save yourself from making the wrong decision, just block your ex instead. That way you know that you won’t even try to play the “just friends” card since there’s no way it will work for you.
11. It will give you time and space to heal
Blocking your ex may be your way of putting your mental health first. It can be seen as a way of letting your heart heal after all of the pain it went through.
You finally have enough time and space to find the path forward. And your ex won’t be anywhere around you to stop you from reaching your final destination.
If you really think that it will be easier for you to get over this whole mess once you block him, then do that for the sake of your happiness – and don’t even bother about what others have to say.
12. There are better things waiting for you
Every moment that you spend looking at your ex’s profile is another moment completely wasted, and on the wrong person for that matter.
If you ask me, “Should I block my ex?” then let me ask you how you would rather spend your time – chasing after him, or looking for your soulmate?
Maybe it’s not the first time you’ve been with the wrong person, but it could be the last time you became someone’s ex-girlfriend.
13. Your new boyfriend won’t like it
Just consider what will happen when you find a new boyfriend and tell him about your ex.
When he sees that you still treasure him in your list of friends, I can almost guarantee he won’t be happy about it.
It will seem to him as if you are keeping a window of opportunity open so you could eventually get back with him, or at least keeping him as your fallback.
That’s how your new boyfriend will see it, so it’s a good idea to rather block your ex for the sake of your future relationship.
7 reasons why NOT to block your ex
Besides reasons why you should block your ex, there are also valid reasons not to choose to take that step. And I’ve made sure to show you the other side of the story as well.
Once you figure out your goal and what’s best for you, then you can decide on what you think will give you the results you need.
1. You want to give your ex another chance
If you’re thinking about giving your ex a second chance and trying to start all over again, then blocking him isn’t the best option.
You won’t get him back by blocking him because that’s like expecting him to tell you he loves you after you have punched him in the face.
You believe that you had a fulfilling relationship and you truly think that your ex and you are a great fit. But maybe some other things got in the way between you and that’s why your relationship fell apart.
If you believe that you can work on the mistakes you both made in the past, you could try your luck one more time. But first, you need to see if your ex is on the same page, only then can you act accordingly.
Maybe this is just an obstacle you can easily fix if you both commit to rectifying the problem.
In this case, it’s not a good idea to block your ex as that’ll make things more difficult. If you’re thinking about reaching out to him, then it seems pointless to go back and forth with no greater purpose.
2. You need some time to figure out what you want
The relationship ended but you’re still unsure of what your next step should be. Is there a way to fix the damage or is it better to end things forever?
You first need some time to figure out what you actually want. After that, you can then take steps in the right direction.
In this case, it seems pointless to block your ex – at least for now.
What if you change your mind in a few days and decide that you actually want to give him a second chance? You’ll come across as indecisive and immature, which will make him think that it’s not the best for him to get back with you in the first place.
So, it’s better to keep everything as it is and not opt for blocking him right away. Once you’re sure what you want, then feel free to block him or not.
3. You ended on good terms and want to stay friends
Most breakups are messy, but there are a few times when things end with no fuss. You simply agree that you have nothing to look out for in a relationship and that you both can be much happier than you currently are.
After that, you make a promise that you’ll stay good friends as there’s no resentment or animosity toward each other. None of you did anything that hurt the other person and there’s no reason to avoid each other.
If this scenario is familiar, then you have no reason to block your ex. You already agreed on staying on good terms, and one wrong move would certainly ruin that.
4. You don’t want to be seen as immature and childish
If you’ve been hurt by a breakup, you’ll probably think about blocking your ex. It’s a way of giving yourself short-term relief from the anger you’re feeling.
But if you don’t want to be seen as immature or childish, then blocking him isn’t the way to go.
Your ex will probably make fun of you once he realizes that you weren’t capable of keeping him on your list of friends. It will make him look at you with different eyes and he’ll realize that you’re not as mature as he thought.
If that’s something you don’t want to evoke in him, then don’t block your ex. It’s all about your personal preferences and how much you care about his opinion.
5. You don’t want him to think you’re playing mind games with him
Blocking someone is usually used to gain attention. And doing that in case of a breakup is nothing different.
If you decide to block your ex, he’ll surely think that you’re trying to play some sort of mind game with him. He’ll assume that you’re trying to manipulate him into something, although it may not necessarily be your intention at all.
Maybe you decide to block him because you want to live a life where he’s not everywhere around you. In your case, blocking him is a way of giving yourself well-deserved self-care.
But no matter your reasons, he won’t see it as such. Instead, he’ll think that you’re doing it just to make him act the way you want. And that’s why he’ll accuse you of playing games with him.
6. You don’t want him to know you’re upset
When you decide to block your ex, it usually means that the breakup upset you and you can’t stand looking at him.
Your feelings overpowered you and you had to remove him from your life, at least by not seeing him on your social media.
In this case, he’ll know that the whole process was disturbing to you and he might see that as his victory. Especially if had an easy time moving on after you.
He might even think that you’re desperate to get back together with him and that you’re doing everything you can to get his attention.
So, if you don’t want him to know that you’re upset, then you shouldn’t think about blocking him. You’ll be giving him the satisfaction of thinking he’s won, and if that’s not your plan, then you better leave things as they are.
7. You’re better than blocking him
Instead of “Should I block my ex?” rather ask yourself this instead: Does refreshing his Insta feed sound like something a confident, strong woman would do?
Unfollow him before you become desperate and lose your dignity. Remind yourself that to him, you are just an ex-girlfriend, and the next day, try to be stronger.
After all, you deserve only the best and he can’t give it to you.
Types of exes that should definitely be blocked!
There are certain types of exes that definitely need to be blocked. They won’t let you move on properly and will always find ways to crawl back into your love life.
Even if you let them know that you don’t want to have anything with them, they won’t know how to stop. They’ll keep bothering you until you can’t take it anymore.
1. The one who contacts you every time he’s bored
You should totally block an ex who contacts you only when he’s bored, because this guy is determined.
He’ll keep calling you every time he has nothing else to do. Even though your relationship is over and you told him multiple times that you don’t want to have anything with him, he refuses to listen to you.
When he has no one else to talk to, he suddenly remembers you and decides to suck all of the energy out of you.
Especially if this isn’t the first time he’s done this, you might want to consider blocking him and saving yourself from his draining presence in your life.
2. The one who reaches out to you after a year of not being together and says he misses you
Well, of course he misses you since he hasn’t been able to find a better girl in the last year or more. Don’t look forward to his call because it’s too late for that, and you don’t want to be his choice only when there’s no one else.
If you’re dating someone new, don’t jeopardize that relationship because of your ex. Rather block him right away, so he doesn’t bother you anymore.
3. The one who drunk-dials you
Maybe you’ve been yearning to hear those words from him when he was with you and sober. But he’s saying them now that you have broken up and he’s had one too many.
If this happens often, it’s a good enough reason to block him. That way, you won’t have to bother deciphering his drunken texts and incoherent voice messages.
If he truly wanted you back, he would’ve had the guts to say it to you when he was sober.
4. The one who’ll rub in your face how happy he is with someone else
Change your identity and move far away, throw your phone in the river and find a new life. Of course, I’m just kidding, but having a guy you once wanted to marry among your Facebook friends is a bad idea.
Especially if he’s the type who he loves bragging to you about how happy he is with someone else.
He only wants to hurt you, and there’s no need for you to allow that. Why else would he be telling his ex about how happy he is with his new girlfriend?
Delete the douche from your life, so you can forget about him and move on already.
5. The married one who’s messaging you
If so much time has passed that he’s now married to someone else yet tells you that he regrets not marrying you, just say thanks and block him.
You don’t need that kind of complication in your life. And if it took him so much time to realize that he wants to be with you, he’s sure not worth your time.
After all, he’s probably having some problems in his marriage and wants to cheat on his wife. Be happy that you dodged that bullet because he would’ve been unfaithful to you as well if you ended up being his wife.
6. The one you keep getting back together with
If you keep breaking up with this guy and then getting back together just so you can break up again, then it’s time to end this toxic cycle of heartbreak. Get out of it, and vow to never make the same mistake again.
It’s obvious that the two of you can’t make it work, no matter how many times you keep looking for ways to get back into each other’s arms.
That’s why you need to end things forever or you’ll end up being stuck in the same stagnant place till the end of your life.
And I’m sure that’s not really a part of your plan.
Is there an alternative to blocking my ex?
All of your friends keep telling you that you should block your ex. They say that’s the best thing you can do for yourself.
But you’re not really a fan of that move. You aren’t one to burn bridges and believe it’s an unnecessary step that leaves a lot of resentment behind.
So, if you don’t want to block your ex, but you still need a way to free yourself from his presence in your life, then I’ve got something that will work for you.
Instead of pretending he doesn’t exist by blocking him on every single social media account, you can always decide to unfollow or unfriend him.
If he isn’t bothering you in any sense and he doesn’t fall under one of the categories of exes I already listed above, then unfollowing him might be the right avenue for you.
It will prevent you from seeing how happy he is without you and still allow you to heal faster after your broken relationship. Instead of being surrounded by his happy face all the time, you’ll have your own space where you’ll give yourself a chance to move on.
Also, you’ll save yourself from stalking him, which you know is wrong on so many levels.
So, if you really don’t want to block your ex, unfollow him and save yourself from getting hurt. The best thing about this decison is that he won’t know that you don’t see his posts.
I hope that this article was helpful and it made it easier for you to figure out what you’re supposed to do.
Never forget that your heart knows what’s best for you, and you should always listen to it.
If you think you’ll be happier after blocking your ex, then go for it. The same applies if you feel that you couldn’t stand removing him from your life completely.
You know what you want and you should follow your instinct. And if it all gets too much to deal with at any point in time, you can always change your mind.
Nothing’s stopping you from finding the happiness you deserve.