Think aloud
After the first date, we get excited and it’s normal to have some second date expectations. Maybe you really like this person so you even get nervous while preparing to see them again.
What’s going to happen? Will it go well?
Stop for a second and relax. Yes, the second date can lead to a serious relationship but you shouldn’t get overwhelmed with second date expectations.
Don’t rush into anything if your date prefers taking things slowly. Once you find out what you can expect, it’ll be easier for you to play it cool, so keep reading.
15 Answers To Your Questions About Second Date Expectations
1. How to know whether they’re interested in going on a second date?
After the first date, if someone likes you, they won’t stop thinking about when they’ll get to see you again… but are they interested? There are ways to know whether someone is interested in you but you can even ask them.
Some people don’t send clear signals so they may be hard to read and act a little guarded. Give them some time to relax so that they can be comfortable around you.
You can keep dating but take your time when getting to know each other.
If you’re interested in them, don’t give up on the second date. They’ll surely let you know whether they’re interested in going on another date or not.
2. Do you like them?
There are some questions that only you can answer… Like are you into your date?
Do you like them a lot and want a long-term relationship, something casual, or simply friendship? Your second date is the right time to ask yourself these questions.
Everyone has some second date expectations so what are yours? Be honest about them since you don’t want to hurt your date if they feel differently.
If you’re a man and you’re dating a woman who’s searching for something more serious, let her go if you can’t give her that.
Maybe you and your date have the same date expectations and that’s great! Take each other seriously if you’re on the same page because it could turn into a love story.
If the two of you are compatible and things are going well, talk about being exclusive.
Some people don’t expect that on a second date and need more time so keep that in mind but some people are interested only in exclusive dating so know that too.
Being honest with yourself is important here, so try to determine how you truly feel about the person you’re dating.
3. How can you prepare?
On the second date, you’re more relaxed than on the first one. Still, if you already have feelings for your potential partner, you may be under pressure.
You shouldn’t be worried though, because since you’re going on a second one, the first one went well.
Before going on your second date, make sure to take your time. Choose your outfit carefully and think about some questions you can ask your date, as this way, you’ll be more focused and more prepared.
It’s also important to pick the right spot, so choose a really great location that your date will never forget.
How to achieve that? Well, think about what they’ve never done before.
Maybe it’s bowling, going to a jazz concert, or having a picnic, or perhaps they even mentioned something during your first date. It needs to be exciting and creative but it doesn’t have to cost much.
Focus on getting to know the person better. Don’t stress yourself over it, let it flow naturally, and do something different than you did when you went on your first date.
Remember everything you can from the first one; did they mention something that you can refer to on your second date? You can talk about generic topics until they bring up something specific.
Maybe it would be a good idea to buy them a gift for the second date. Consider it but make sure to pick something personal and inexpensive.
Don’t flash your money around and keep your wallet in your pocket until it’s time to pay or split the bill, as doing otherwise may send the wrong message.
Communication is the most important thing, so after the second date, make sure to keep in touch.
4. Where should you go on your second date?
Doing the same thing every time you go on a date is a bad idea. Your date may think of you as boring if you keep going to similar places all the time.
When you’re dating, you should create memories together because they may turn out to be your history as a couple.
Whether you’re just casually chatting or dating exclusively, put effort into making your dates interesting. You can do whatever you want for your second date but it’s a good idea that you choose something your date likes.
Maybe they enjoy outdoor activities so the two of you can take a walk in a park or go hiking. As mentioned earlier, you may even want to have a picnic to create a romantic atmosphere.
It can be anything you can think of, as long as both of you like it.
Keep in mind that you’ll need to have time to talk as well so it’s important that you have some time for just the two of you.
You may want to show physical affection but that’s up to you and your date. If they’re not comfortable with it yet, you need to respect that.
5. What are you going to talk about?
The whole purpose of the second date is for the two of you to learn more about each other. But what conversations match their second date expectations?
If your first date didn’t go well, you wouldn’t be going on a second one to begin with, so relax. For now, the two of you like each other’s company and want to see where it can go.
Now you need to open up and see how compatible you actually are, which is why second date expectations often include discussing what each of you is looking for in a partner.
You’ll sense each other’s vibe and it’ll determine whether there will be a third date.
Second date expectations include having a good time but open up more than you did when you were on your first date.
Avoid discussing very serious topics and telling your potential partner your plans for the future, as this may be too intense for a second date.
You can tell your date what kind of goals you have in life but don’t pressure them to become a part of your life. Your conversations should flow and you need to let them.
Get to know your date better and let them learn more about you. The topics you should discuss depend on your personality but talking a little about your hobbies and interests is never a bad idea.
For now, you’re trying to build a bond and see what kind of a connection you can have and the conversations you have will help you determine whether you’re a good match.
6. What are some good topics for conversation?
The best way to start is by mentioning something from the first date. Maybe they said they were going to their sister’s birthday party, so ask how it was and whether they had a good time.
Whatever it is, make sure to show that you paid attention during your first date.
Get to know more about them without asking overly intimate questions. Learn about their aspirations, hopes, and dreams.
Talk about some pleasant memories from the past too, like who they looked up to while growing up. If they open up about more things from their past, it shows that they trust you.
You probably want to know about their past relationships, too, but pay attention to whether they’re comfortable discussing this with you. If they’re open to talking about their love life, great, but if they’re not, don’t push it.
Switch to the topic of passions instead. Surely there are things they’re passionate about and getting them to talk to you about them will make them happy.
Don’t forget to talk about their likes and dislikes but don’t forget humor either. Making your date laugh can guarantee that you’ll get to go on a third date!
7. Should you show physical affection?
If both of you are fine with showing physical affection, you can. Pay attention to how your date reacts to your touch, and if they flinch or try to avoid it, don’t push it.
People aren’t always in the mood for physical touch or even open to it when they meet someone new. Maybe you haven’t yet started holding hands and a walk in the park may be a great opportunity for that.
Even a kiss on the cheek can be romantic so don’t overdo it with affection on the second date. Take your time and see if your date can end with a kiss or a hug.
Maybe you already kissed on the first date but if you didn’t, you can show your date that you want to.
You should definitely show that you’re interested but don’t go overboard with physical affection, especially if it makes your date uncomfortable.
8. What kind of second date expectations can you have?
Everyone has different second date expectations. Some just want to hook up right away, while others need time to see whether there’s actual chemistry or not.
Keep in mind that you and your potential partner may see the date from entirely different perspectives.
While you may think the date was great because you had good conversations, they may think that it was ruined by a lack of physical affection.
Whichever it is, try not to do anything that you’ll later regret.
Most people go for dinner on their second date and there’s a logical reason for that. You’re trying to get to know each other so you need to be able to talk.
If you go to see a movie, you’re not going to learn much about each other, since you can’t communicate with words.
That’s where ‘dinner and a movie’ comes from. It gives you some time to just be together and talk and some time to see how you feel in each other’s presence.
In addition, you can talk about the film on your way home. Maybe you’ll end up together because you like the same things.
Remember that men and women often have different second date expectations, though. A lot of the time, one person’s looking for true love while the other one just wants something casual.
9. Do second date expectations include kissing?
Regardless of which date is in question, both of you need to be okay with kissing.
The second date is like a second chance to present yourself and make a good impression. You get to learn more about each other and see how compatible you are.
Kissing on the second date is not uncommon or rare and it depends solely on the two of you and the way your date goes.
If both of you are okay with kissing on the second date, nothing’s stopping you. It’s perfectly fine to kiss but don’t try to get involved with someone you don’t know much about too quickly.
You don’t have to follow any rules but when you meet a stranger, take things slowly and don’t forget that they may not be interested in a serious relationship.
If you get a kiss on your second date, it’s often a good sign that your potential partner feels chemistry with you. The way they kiss you may give you more hints about how they feel.
If you’re both feeling butterflies, maybe you already have strong emotions for each other. A bad first kiss may show that your chemistry is not as great as you think but it could be that were simply too nervous.
Don’t compare the way you feel about this person when you kiss them with the way you felt about other people you dated. It’s never a good idea to bring your past into a relationship with someone you may have a future with.
Every person is different and every date is different, so try not to assume things too quickly.
While some kiss on the very first date, some think that even the third date is too soon.
However, if you’re both on the same page, there’s nothing wrong with kissing for the first time on the second date, and before that, kissing on the cheek and hugging is often enough.
If the two of you are thinking of a serious commitment, there’s really no rush. Most often though, guys tend to lean in a little after a date to express their desire to kiss you.
10. Do second date expectations include feeling something while kissing?
You’re supposed to feel warm inside when you kiss for the first time. Some people even get butterflies, while some just want to keep kissing and never stop.
If you don’t feel anything when you kiss, you probably don’t have any chemistry.
Don’t put too much pressure on the first kiss, though. You can develop chemistry later on and you may have just been too nervous the first time.
11. What if he doesn’t kiss you?
We often think that guys are just players and only want a physical relationship but that’s often not the case. If a guy didn’t kiss you on the second date, maybe he got nervous or wasn’t sure you wanted him to kiss you.
Maybe he recently got out of a serious relationship and doesn’t want to rush into a new one right away. Perhaps he simply wasn’t feeling any chemistry or couldn’t find an appropriate moment to kiss you.
Don’t forget that you don’t have to let a guy initiate things. If you want to kiss him, lean in a little and look into his eyes.
You can simply smile if he doesn’t get it or for some other reason doesn’t kiss you at that moment.
12. What do girls expect on a second date?
Most will agree that a second date proves that the first one has gone well but different girls think differently.
Often, a woman rushes to get involved with a potential partner because she feels a connection. Guys who are interested in something serious will often prefer taking things slowly, though.
If you don’t know a guy very well, don’t hurry things and take your time to get to know him.
Of course, if you just want to have fun that’s okay too but if you’re looking for love, don’t assume that you’ve found it before he proves it over time.
No one can tell you exactly what to do, however. You have to decide and sometimes, letting things flow naturally is the best choice.
Girls often fall in love quickly and get heartbroken later, so keep in mind that finding true love takes time and patience.
The second date is too early to truly know a person, so don’t start imagining them as someone they’re not. Don’t romanticize things and try to see your potential partner objectively.
Men often observe your body language and clothing style. If you’re all dressed up for a date, they’ll assume that you’re interested in them. On the other hand, if you look like you’re going to visit your grandmother, they’ll assume you’re not that interested.
13. What do guys expect on a second date?
Guys are not all the same and different men think differently too. Many men are actually looking for that special someone just like many girls are.
If you’re a man, don’t expect a girl who’s looking for something serious to agree to something casual.
Maybe you’re both interested in each other but you shouldn’t jump to conclusions. Don’t rush to show physical affection if you respect a girl and want a serious relationship with her.
The purpose of dating is to learn more about each other and see whether you’re a good match.
Can you build something lasting? During the second date, you should focus on that question.
If you’re a woman, try to read between the lines when you talk to him. As long as you stay objective enough, you’ll probably be able to tell what his intentions are.
A guy who’s really serious about you will enjoy discussing the future. He won’t run away screaming at the very mention of commitment and will instead be glad you brought it up.
14. How many dates should you go on before becoming exclusive?
Some people aren’t willing to be exclusive with anyone, while others are searching for a serious relationship. After a few dates, you can simply ask whether what you have is going somewhere or not.
You may be surprised and discover that your date already thinks that the two of you are in a relationship and it wasn’t just dating for them.
Communication is important and it’s okay to ask to be exclusive on the second date. Their answer will pretty much reveal their intentions and the way they see you.
15. What are the second date rules?
The rules of the second date are quite simple. Trust your gut and don’t put yourself into a situation that may be unsafe.
You can even know how to spot a narcissist on your very first date.
Whatever your plans and ideas for the date are, if something doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. Take it slowly and give yourself time to decide whether this is someone you want to be with or you want to stop dating them.
Keep in mind that they will also analyze you during the first three dates. If they don’t like something, they may not want to see you anymore…
But why would you even want to be with someone who judges you so quickly? Just try to show them the best version of yourself and if they don’t like it, they’re not the person for you.
Good luck!
