We can all agree that the worst feeling ever is when your ex moves on with someone new. You’re still hurting, you’re still broken, but he’s over it and he’s moved on with his life.
It doesn’t matter how the relationship ended. Sometimes, people break up for no reason at all other than they figured that they weren’t right for each other. Other times, it’s more complex than that.
More often than not, breakups end up being very dramatic. You’re parting ways with someone you thought to be the love of your life. You two spent so much time and effort on each other and the thought of leaving is nothing less than terrifying.
Whichever one of these was the case with your breakup, it doesn’t change the fact that you’re probably hurt enough to not be able to just move on from your ex. You’re taking things slowly because you’re heartbroken.
You want the best for him. You want him to be happy and content with his life and that includes a new partner. Someone who will be right for him, someone he’ll love in ways he didn’t know how to love you.
But that doesn’t mean that you want him to just go off and find someone new right away. Yes, you’re okay with him dating, but can’t he at least wait a little while longer?
He jumped straight into a new relationship and the time span between the breakup and his new relationship was definitely not enough for you to heal.
You’re not ready to watch him love someone else when there’s so much emotional residue in you.
There are so many questions that are going through your head right now. You want to know how they met and when. You want to know if she’s the woman he’s always been looking for.
At one point, you think to yourself: What if he ends up loving her more than he ever loved me?
I know that you’re going through a tough time right now. These questions don’t really give you a lot of security. You’re overthinking everything and it’s not getting easier the more you think about this.
But you have to know that if he ends up loving her for a long period of time or ends up marrying her, he does love her more than he loved you. This is the hard-hitting truth that you don’t want to hear.
There’s also a big chance that he only found himself a rebound. He’s just as hurt as you and he can’t just live knowing that he’s alone. That’s why he’s started up a relationship with the first girl who showed interest.
He could’ve done it out of sheer spite as well. But it could be genuine if they truly do seem happy with each other.
You don’t want to hear that. You want me to tell you that she’s nothing more than a quick fix for the brokenness inside his heart, but she’s probably not.
Many people find the love of their life after a traumatic breakup.
Your only responsibility right now is to take care of yourself. It’s none of your concern if he’s happy with someone else or not.
But that’s so much easier said than done.
You want him to remember you. You want him to think back to the memories of you, and there might even be a little bit of hope inside that’s telling you that you might find your way back to each other.
He doesn’t seem to remember. But why does that even matter to you? Why would you want someone from your past to still hold on to you?
It didn’t work out between you two, wouldn’t you want him to move on? Isn’t this the perfect moment for you to move on too?
It’s not easy to heal from someone who’s already healed from you, though. It hurts even more when it seems you’re the only one hurting.
When you know that it hurts him just as much as it hurts you, then it’s like you’re sharing the pain. But now the entire burden of the breakup is on your own shoulders and you feel like you’re breaking under the pressure.
You’re wondering: If you’d met a little later in life, would it have worked out?
It’s completely normal to ask yourself these questions. You want to think that if you met each other later in life, you could’ve been happy together.
You feel like growing through different relationships would’ve brought you closer together.
He came into your life unexpectedly when you were this version of you who simply wasn’t right for him. He wasn’t right for you either.
Accepting that is hard. But you have to remember that the universe will send you the right person at the right time.
He came into your life in a moment when you needed him the most. You needed him to teach you a few lessons and to prepare you for the love of your life.
Thinking about the person you loved the most for such a long period of time is rough. And it only gets worse when you start thinking of him loving someone else better than he ever loved you.
You don’t want to imagine his hands on someone else’s body or his lips kissing another woman’s. You don’t want to imagine him telling her everything that you wanted him to tell you.
But you have to let those thoughts go and move on with your life. He’s moved on and you shouldn’t be far behind.
Yes, you can take all the time you need in this world to get back on your own feet and prepared to love someone more than you’ve ever loved him. But you can’t expect him to sit around and mourn you forever.
People meet under mysterious circumstances and they give us the things that we need from them at that very moment. They give us their love and affection, they teach us the lessons we had to learn, and then sometimes they leave.
Just because he didn’t decide to love you forever doesn’t make your relationship any less valuable.
But you have to remember that there is more to love than this awful pain that you’re experiencing right now. The love of your life is somewhere out there and you have to make room in your heart for when he appears.
You’re worthy of a love that is greater than anything that you’ve ever experienced. When he arrives, you’ll know it by the way you’ll completely forget that your ex started dating someone before you even moved on.
So don’t stress about it. Don’t compare your own progress with his. Don’t let yourself believe that just because he found someone else that you were insignificant to him.
You made an impact. You taught him a lot as well. Let him find the love he deserves elsewhere, just like you’ll find the love you deserve.
And life will make sense again. Love will make sense again.
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