What is considered a long-distance relationship? How is it different from any regular relationship? And how long can a long-distance relationship last?
First, let’s define LDR: when two partners are separated by long-distance due to some emotional, physical, or indirect obstacles. Any type of physical contact is extremely difficult and limited. This is why many people refuse to commit to someone when they know they won’t be able to see their partner in person on a regular basis.
Luckily, there are also those who are brave enough, who listen to their heart and engage in a relationship like this, even though they’re aware that they’ll face many challenging issues. Once you start a long-distance relationship, it’s tough to maintain a connection and intimacy with your significant other, but it’s definitely worth it for those who can manage it.
As the name implies, couples are usually separated by something physical, like distance, or something abstract, such as cultural or religious bias. But it doesn’t matter whether the distance is abstract or concrete, it still takes away the pleasure of seeing or touching your significant other, which can put a lot of pressure on both partners.
Physical intimacy is something that most of us yearn for. Having the ability to see your partner and to hug or kiss them plays a huge role in trying to preserve a healthy and successful relationship.
But that’s not possible in an LDR. Still, that doesn’t mean that these relationships have no future.
Can a long-distance relationship work?
Even if you hear from many relationship experts that an LDR can’t work, that’s simply not true. After all, it’s like every other romantic relationship insofar as both partners need to have patience and be persistent in making it work.
You can’t just sit back and completely rely on love. If you do that, then you must know that your relationship is already doomed to fail.
To love and be loved is necessary for any kind of relationship, but it’s not enough to make things work. You both have to appreciate, respect, and trust each other if you want your LDR to succeed. In fact, I have a couple of friends who survived the long-distance issue and ended up getting married.
Whether or not you’ll be able to handle the physical distance or cultural bias is all up to you and your partner. If you love each other and have that emotional connection, then your LDR will be like a fairy tale. On the other hand, if you lack any of those crucial components, then it’ll turn into your worst nightmare.
How long can long-distance relationships last?
Don’t believe those who say that a long-distance relationship won’t last long. Usually, they don’t know what they’re talking about or they lack the strength to engage in an LDR themselves.
One thing is clear – it’ll last as long as both sides equally contribute to their relationship. It’s that simple.
Distance means nothing if both partners are determined to make it work. Those miles don’t determine how long a relationship will last. Facing obstacles together can strengthen your relationship, it shouldn’t be the reason for breaking up.
Therefore, a long-distance couple can survive the physical or emotional barrier for years before they decide to get married or move in together.
How to make a long-distance relationship work
So, the real question that you’re asking yourself now is “How do I deal with a long-distance relationship?” Truth be told, there’s no single answer to this, but still, I’m going to try to help you get through this issue.
1. Don’t hesitate, go all in
You can’t be hesitant. Don’t for a second think that you and your partner won’t make it if you do decide to start a long-distance relationship. You have to go wholeheartedly into it and be ready to put in the work.
It requires a lot of energy and time on both ends to make a relationship like this last. That’s why you must be honest and direct with your partner and confess that you’re unable to continue being physically separated if that’s how you truly feel.
On the other hand, if you’re sure about your feelings for this person and you want to take it to another level, then the only right thing to do is to stay committed to the very end.
2. Be patient
Whenever you’re having some doubts about whether or not you’re going to succeed, just think about the person you’re with and know that they’re worth the wait. That way you’ll ease your mind a bit and remind yourself what you’re fighting for.
I understand that your perception of time is different and somehow twisted when you find yourself in a situation like this. Suddenly, hours feel like days and days feel like months.
And I know that those physical or whatever other obstacles you’re facing right now are hurting you emotionally, but you have to be patient. It’s your only option.
Try to take a different approach and look on the bright side – one day you’ll be able to wake up in the same bed with your partner and kiss them good morning. And that’s something no one can take away from you.
3. Stay loyal
The only thing that can comfort you in a situation like this is the fact that your partner is always one click away. With the rise of modern technology, it’s never been easier to contact the one you love.
All that online communication makes things more bearable when you’re unable to see your loved one in person. But sometimes it can feel as if no type of communication can replace their presence.
That’s why it’s not unusual for couples in LDR to have trouble with staying loyal since many can’t keep their natural desires under control. Nevertheless, cheating is always unacceptable in any kind of relationship.
4. Keep your eyes on the end goal
One thing that can give you the strength to overcome any obstacle you may face in your LDR is to always keep all the goals you made for your future in mind.
When you’re feeling down or when you’re uncertain when you’re going to see each other again, try to remind yourself that all the issues you’ve been having about your distance are just temporary.
You need to enjoy your present, but what waits for you at the end of the tunnel is much sweeter than you can ever imagine. Remember, one day you’ll have the opportunity to see your partner every day and feel their warmth.
5. Never lose hope in your love!
If the love you have for each other is genuine and strong, then there’s nothing in this world that can break you apart. The spark you two share can give you the much-needed strength to keep going, so don’t allow any external factors to affect it.
Your circumstances don’t define you as a couple and there will be other obstacles waiting for you on your path. Love can ease the pain both of you are experiencing at the moment, but you have to cherish and nurture it like a delicate flower.
Secrets nobody tells you about long-distance relationships
If you’re uncertain that you’ll be able to withstand being apart from your partner, then you should know right off the bat not to start a long-distance relationship. But if you’re sure that you love him and you’ll do everything in your power to make it work, then here are some things to keep in mind.
Jealousy will creep up on you
Fights and arguments are unavoidable in any kind of relationship, but in LDRs, they are more frequent than usual. Jealousy isn’t something that will be unfamiliar to you, but where there’s love, there’s a way to overcome it.
There will be times where you’re going to fight with your partner for not dedicating enough time for you or even about something insignificant, but this test is only for the strongest ones and those whose love is genuine and pure.
Healthy communication is everything
Knowing that the only way to communicate with your partner is on screen can be frustrating and exhausting, to say the least. But it will make you cherish your chats that much more.
You’ll be more honest and share all your ideas with your partner. Being able to talk with your partner about anything is a must for a healthy relationship, and this is especially true when you don’t have the possibility to see each other and have an in-person conversation.
There will be things that will remind you of your partner
Wherever you turn around, there will be something reminding you of your partner. It may be a song, a necklace, or something as simple as a store sign. Those little things will confirm the feelings you have for your partner and you’ll be more confident that your love is worth fighting for.
And if you think that it’s weird that you cry a lot, don’t worry. That’s a normal thing to happen for couples who are in a long-distance relationship. However, you have to focus on the future and not sweat the irrelevant stuff.
Long-distance relationship quotes
If it’s any comfort to you, you’re not the only one struggling in your long-distance relationship. It’s perfectly okay if you’re feeling weak when you know that you’re miles apart from the person you love the most.
These long-distance relationship quotes can help you move forward when it all gets too much and you’re considering calling it quits:
1. “Maybe it’s a good idea to write something about you in my book… At least then, there will be a place where we will meet every day… and be together forever!” – Anamika Mishra
2. “I never got to tell him again that he really was wrong, that miles didn’t matter, not if you loved someone. That borders and oceans weren’t obstacles, not for the mind. I wished I’d been able to tell him these things, because saying them out loud to someone real, instead of a mirror or a picture postcard, would have made them all the more convincing.” – Emylia Hall
3. “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” – A. A. Milne (Winnie-the-Pooh)
4. “Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It’s for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It’s for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don’t see it nearly enough.” – Meghan Daum
5. “I don’t cry because we’ve been separated by distance, and for a matter of years. Why? Because for as long as we share the same sky and breathe the same air, we’re still together.” – Donna Lynn Hope
6. “I believe in the immeasurable power of love; that true love can endure any circumstance and reach across any distance.” – Steve Maraboli
7. “Seasons of the heart. To get through what I must I’m often encased in ice and for months he chips away until he can see my face and after a while, I begin to thaw. As warmth and feeling returns, my emotions continue to build until my personality is set on fire. When he leaves, the fire dwindles until there is but a flicker. Then there is stillness and winter returns.” – Donna Lynn Hop
8. “It seemed that we loved each other better when there were large swaths of two continents between us. The daily work of love was often hard to perform at home.” – Aleksandar Hemon
9. “Does distance really matter? You love your favorite actor, drool for your favorite singer and wait patiently for the next art from your favorite artist or writer. Why not the one you love?” – Jane Morsel
10. “No matter how far you manage to go, the distance will never be able to erase those beautiful memories. There is so much goodness that we shared together.” – Lucy Aims
11. “The very least you can do in your life is to figure out what you hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance, but live right in it, under its roof.” – Barbara Kingsolver
12. “I know we loved each other, but distance can do strange things to people and before I was willing to tell you about it, I wanted to be certain that it would last” – Nicholas Sparks
13. “Distance teaches us to appreciate the days that we are able to spend together and distance teaches us the definition of patience. It is a reminder that every moment together is special, and every second should be cherished.” – Unknown
14. “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.” – Helen Keller
15. “Tonight I can write the saddest lines. To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her. And to hear the immense night, still more immense without her.” – Pablo Neruda
16. “Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.” – Edna St. Vincent Millay
17. “Being in a long-distance relationship is like being in school all over again: Distance teaches us to appreciate the days that we get to spend together and how to define patience. It reminds us that every moment together is special, and every second together should be cherished… And just like when I was in school, I’d rather skip class and kiss you in the stairwell.” – Lisa McKay
18. “’Maintaining a long-distance relationship requires a lot of discipline,’‘ surmised Duncan. ’The loneliness that they experience is a formidable force to be reckoned with, and not everyone can withstand it. A physical entity is always more powerful than a voice distorted by static, more so when they encounter problems and want to share them with their partner in real-time. In such cases, they usually turn to a third party, and that’s when the relationships fall apart like a house of cards.’” – Alexis Lawrence
19. “Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.” – Thomas Fuller
20. “Ocean separates lands, not souls.” – Munia Khan
21. “How do you know if something is real? That’s easy. Does it change you or does it form you? Does it give you wings? Or does it give you roots? Does it make you look back a month ago and say, ’I am a whole different person right now’? If yes, then it’s real. The evidence of truth and reality lies in how much something can touch you, can change you, even if it’s from very far away. Distance is only evidence of what can be surpassed.” – C. JoyBell C.
22. “Once trust is built, distance cannot kill it. Time and space alone cannot destroy the authentic connection.” – Vironika Tugaleva
23. “Being close is the first and last desire of lovers, but being far and loving each other without an inch’s difference is the characteristic of real love.” – Senora Ray
24. “The distance may be far and wide but my heart can cover them all. The space between us is so much more but you should know that I love you so!” – Linda Roy
25. “Waiting does not bother me, nor does the distance that is cropping up between us. All I want is a true commitment and to know that your heart will never change.” – Ting Stores
Inspirational long-distance relationship quotes
1. “Can miles truly separate you from friends? If you want to be with someone you love, aren’t you already there?” – Richard Bach
2. “I love when I reach Marcus on the phone and as he says hello, I can hear the music he’s listening to in the background. That music is the sound of him without me. How he surrounds himself when I’m not there, which is almost all the time.” – Megan McCafferty
3. “Absence is to love as wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small and kindles the great.” – Roger de Bussy-Rabutin
4. “Just because things are not at their best right now does not mean that we should give up. Gold is tested in fire and something precious like love needs distance to be tested.” – Olga Peters
5. “Some of the toughest things in this world are to really want someone and not have them around you. Those are the times when you don’t know what to do. All you can do for is wait.” – Tamara Louis
6. “I have made new friends and have many new people that I know. But hey, you will always be a special part of my heart because no one has been able to replace the space you left in it.” – Stephen Lob
7. “That farewell kiss which resembles greeting, that last glance of love which becomes the sharpest pang of sorrow.” – George Eliot
8. “I can bear the distance but cannot imagine a life without you. For you, I will go through the distance and the heartaches. You are my one and only.” – Montana Lee
9. “Sometimes I just sit in front of the computer dreaming. I have food in front of me but no appetite to eat it. All because my heart misses you and my mind is dreaming about you.” – Sandra Toms
10. ”Your absence has not taught me how to be alone, it merely has shown that when together we cast a single shadow on the wall.” – Doug Fetherling
11. “This is the sad bed of chosen chastity because you are miles and mountains away.” – Erica Jong
12. “My dear, I think of you always and at night I build myself a warm nest of things I remember and float in your sweetness till morning.” – Zelda Fitzgerald
13. “I close my eyes, thinking that there is nothing like an embrace after an absence, nothing like fitting my face into the curve of his shoulder and filling my lungs with the scent of him.” – Jodi Picoult
14. ”The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again.” – Charles Dickens
15. ”I exist in two places, here and where you are.’’ – Margaret Atwood