It’s not easy to leave him. Whoever said that walking away was the easiest thing to do when love dies has never been in this situation.
When you met him, you were mesmerized by him. Even though you thought that he was a dork and always said the stupidest things, you still fell for him.
You fell for him and you were so impatient to call him yours. You wanted to be his as well.
The two of you were floating on cloud nine for such a long time that you weren’t even aware of the moment everything went downhill. I would guess that it started gradually. It wasn’t all at once.
It didn’t just become extremely insufferable to be around him overnight. Actually, you ignored the things that he did and said in favor of feeling needed, protected, and loved (from time to time).
At one point in the relationship, you started seeing the ways he was mistreating you. You became more and more aware of things he did that caused you pain and misery.
Thinking back on it, when was the last time he texted you first? Are you always the one to text him, call him, and initiate any type of contact?
When was the last time he made an effort to see if you were doing alright?
It seems like such a minuscule thing to care about. Who cares if you’re always texting him?
But that doesn’t change the fact that it still makes you feel completely brushed aside. You feel like you’re not important enough to him that he’d think about you during the day.
Do you remember that time when you felt completely exposed when his friends made an effort to make you feel small and stupid? His friends made it a point to make you feel like less just because your opinion didn’t suit them?
This is probably a very specific situation that I’m talking about, but you can remember that time he didn’t stick up for you. There was that one moment that will forever be engraved in your brain.
He didn’t stand up for you. He didn’t protect you. And when you asked him about it, he brushed it off as you being too emotional.
This wasn’t the first time he brushed your emotions aside, was it? He always calls you dramatic and overly sensitive. He never validates your feelings or makes sure you feel warm and welcome.
But you hold on to him. You hold on to the good times. The times he’d buy you flowers, take you out on dates. The times he’d whisper sweet nothings in your ear.
You hold on to the potential he shows you from time to time. You really do see the things that he’s capable of giving you. His love and attention are sweet and caring – when you do get some.
The issue with that is that it’s a rarity. You’re left to wonder, under the hot shower, if love has always meant to be like this. If love is truly supposed to be with someone who puts minimum effort into loving you and keeping you happy.
You’re making one excuse after another for this man because you believe that one day he’ll change. You see his potential! So why won’t he use it?
Isn’t that just so extremely frustrating?
It frustrates you that he puts you on the bottom of his priority list. Everything seems to be more important to him than you are.
This includes his friends, his job, his video games – even just scrolling through social media seems more important to him than talking to you.
So how does that translate in your head? You feel unloved and unmotivated, so much so that you don’t even want to bring up these problems anymore.
But they still seem too small for you to break up with him. You believe that he’s capable of change at one point, so you stay and you wait.
Because of that, I’m here to tell you: Leave him! This is not as good as love can get!
Love isn’t supposed to make you doubt him or yourself. Love isn’t supposed to make you feel this insecure and like you’re losing your mind. I can promise you that!
I’m telling you right now that there is so much more to love than the mediocre things that he considers to be acts of kindness and affection.
You don’t want to leave him because you think that there’s potential? Well, that’s why so many women get stuck waiting for the wrong man to meet their needs. They see that he could do this right if he just put a little bit more effort into it.
But when they say “if he wanted to, he would,” it’s the complete truth. No one should have to waste their time on an incomplete person who refuses to meet their full potential. If he wanted to, he’d work on himself to become the man you’ll love for the rest of your life.
Leave him because there’s always someone out there who will treat you like the queen you are. But you first have to make space in your heart to meet this new someone who will know how to treat you right.
I know that it’s hard to leave someone you’ve known for so long. It’s hard to leave the man you’ve imagined beside you for the rest of your life.
But there’s more to love than neglect and emotional manipulation. There’s more to love than constant fights and a pile of insecurities. Love isn’t about guessing and overthinking.
When someone loves you, they’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy and to deserve you in their lives. There is a man you’ll meet one day who won’t hesitate a second in making you feel like the most special woman in this world.
Just because this man you’re with doesn’t know how to love you properly, doesn’t mean that no one ever will. So don’t waste your time on a guy who obviously can’t realize your importance.
That man you’re dating right now – the man you hope will treat you right one day – will never meet that potential you see in him. But someone else out there is already prepared and ready to meet you.
So leave him. There’s so much more to love than this. This is not as good as love can get.
There’s better for you out there.
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