It’s Hard To Heal When All I Hear Is Your Voice In My Head

When we first met, I never thought it would end. But here I am, hoping for my broken heart to mend. I tried to move on, but I didn’t have any luck so far.

It doesn’t help when others tell me to just forget you. How can I forget someone who meant so much to me? I’m not missing a piece of me, no.

I’m missing a lot more than that. If I may say, I lost my other half. The person who I loved the most is gone. I’d never thought that a breakup could affect me this much.

You know, cold-hearted Scorpio and all that. As if Scorpios have this superpower where they can heal in an instant.

But it turned out to be one of the hardest things I’ve had to go through so far. Sometimes I wish you would just get out of my head so I can continue with my life.

I often catch myself thinking it would’ve been easier if I never met you. It stings when a memory flashes through my mind. It hurts even worse that I still see some of your habits in me. And it pains me that I wake up every morning without you.

Some things are easier said than done. If I could just get over you and go on with my life, I would. Trust me, I would. But I can’t. I’m not saying it’s impossible, but it’s hard to heal when all I hear is your voice in my head.

It echoes through my mind down to my heart and every time it does, it leaves more damage. I never thought a heart could break in two and mine is now falling to pieces. I keep telling myself how all of this was a nightmare and I’ll wake up any time soon. But, who am I kidding?

They say that sometimes holding onto things can hurt more than letting go. They lied. I let you slip through my fingers and here I am, feeling the same hurt as when I held onto you.

The difference is that I wanted to keep you close, but I never wanted to let you go. Still, the show must go on, you know? No matter how hard it might be, I gotta pull through and I have to find ways to heal somehow.

I’ll never forget you and the things we did together. I’ll never forget your smile, the way your eyes sparkled, and all the places we visited together. You’ll hold a special place in my heart, forever.

Or should I try to totally block out any thoughts of you from intruding on my mind? I thought the distance would help me relieve some of the pain I’m feeling, but I guess I was wrong.

The distance might hide you from my eyes, but not from my heart. Sometimes, I get mad at myself for not being able to move on. I’ll get angry because I feel weak and helpless.

You could also say I’m furious with the universe because it had to be this way. At times, I sit and wonder about why things had to end. Why couldn’t we stay together for the rest of our lives?

But it seems pointless to reflect on it while I’m trying to heal. I’m only adding fuel to the fire when thinking about the things we could’ve done. Making peace with myself is hands down the hardest thing I’ve had to do.

I said goodbye to you, but I never thought it was real. Now, the past memories come to haunt me when I’m all alone at night.

I hear your voice and it feels so soothing. No matter how much I love the raspiness in it, it stops me from moving on. Mending a broken heart is a long process.

I wish to hear you speak again and see your lips move again. But I’m not sure I could take it. The road to recovery would perhaps forever be a lost one from that moment on.

I yearn for your touch as well, but I don’t think it would be a good idea. My world would just crumble once again, falling like a house of cards. Your warm touch would be like a blow on them and I’d just collapse yet again.

Sometimes, the heart wishes for something it can’t take. It would lead me straight to you if I gave it full control. But my brain knows that’s not what I need.

You may have been a big part of my life, but it’s in the past now. It’s best if I refrain from even thinking about you. It’s no easy task, but it’s a must if I wish to heal properly.

Then just when I feel like I’ve broken free from the chains of the past, here you come again. I hear your voice, I feel your touch, I see your smile.

I know you’re not there, but I can feel your presence. And I know I won’t get you out of my head that easily. It’s not like ripping off a bandage. I can’t just count to three, rip you from my heart, and move on as if nothing happened.

Even the smallest cuts can leave a mark. When you walked out of my life, you left something in your wake. You probably thought I’d say you left scars, but no, I could never say that.

Instead, you left footprints and they’re carved in so deeply. I’m not sure if anyone else will be able to walk those ever again.

With each step, you took a part of me. But I’m not mad, no. I could never be angry at you. I’m thankful for all of the happy moments I got to share with you.

I’m glad to have known someone like you. And you know what? I don’t care if all I still hear is your voice in my head. It might take me some more time to heal, but eventually, I’ll get there.