I know what you’re saying about me — you’re telling everyone I went totally crazy. You’re telling people I was a complete psycho because I power texted you, left you angry voicemails and went into a temporary state of insanity. I admit it, I flew off the rails, but there’s one thing you failed to mention — how it all went down. You can call me crazy all you want, but let’s not forget what drove me there.

1. I DIDN’T WAKE UP AND CHOOSE THIS BEHAVIOR.It’s not like I woke up one day and decided, “You know what? I’m going to flip the switch today for no reason at all. It’s going to be fun!” Get a grip. You led me down a path where I felt safe with you. I trusted you and every word you said to me, and then you turned it all around. I only reacted to the bomb dropped on me out of nowhere. I didn’t choose to be so confused and upset, and I really wish I wasn’t.

2. YOU AVOIDED THE ISSUE BECAUSE YOU COULDN’T HANDLE BEING A GROWN UP.When I called you on your crap, you completely avoided me. You avoided admitting what you’d done wrong and you didn’t want to talk to me like the grown man you claim to be. You dismissed me as if I was nothing and I’m sorry that I burst your bubble when I showed you that I don’t put up with that garbage.

3. YOU CHANGED IN AN INSTANT, SO I DID TOO.If you’re allowed to flip the switch, so am I. Don’t act like I went completely insane and lost my mind on you for no reason. I tried to approach things fairly and handle things maturely, but you didn’t want any part of it. I deserve better, so I snapped back.

4. STOP AVOIDING THE TRUTH AND BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR PART.It must be nice for you to tell everyone just your side of the story and omit critical details that explains everything more soundly. Not only did you treat me unfairly, but you completely ghosted on me when I wanted to handle it like two mature adults. Sure, maybe I wasn’t of sound mind in the end, but can you really blame me? You weren’t Mr. Perfect either and you need to stop avoiding your part in the blowout.

5. I DON’T ENJOY LOSING MY MIND.No woman enjoys going into crazy mode. We’re actually deeply hurt and upset throughout it. If you think that carrying those types of emotions around is something we like, then you’re the one who’s off your rocker. Get over yourself.

6. I’M NOT SORRY FOR CALLING YOU OUT ON YOUR BS.I might be sorry about my irrational reaction in the end, but like I said, let’s not forget what led me to that place. I won’t apologize for calling you on your disgusting behavior; I’m only sorry that you turned out to be a colossal douchebag who can’t even man up to his own faults.

7. I’M SORRY THAT I WASTED MY TIME.The energy I spent getting completely deranged over you, in hindsight, was completely not worth it. At least you showed me the true size of your balls sooner rather than later, so thank you for that.

8. YOU’RE THE CRAZY ONE FOR HIDING THE REAL STORY.The only thing that’s truly insane is the fact that you continue to tell people you come across that I’m the one to blame and that my state of mind in the end was the reason we split. The only thing crazy about a man who calls a woman crazy is the fact that he hides the real story.

9. SAY WHAT YOU WANT — I KNOW THE TRUTH.If it makes you feel better to drag my name through the mud, then have at it. I actually pity you for avoiding your own accountability. I’m not proud that I went crazy with you and I feel bad that it ended that way, but we both know the truth — you brought it out of me. It wasn’t all me.

By Andrea Wesley for Bolde