I asked you if this all was a make believe? This love affair we created. I guess I never really wanted to know the truth. I loved being with you and feeling like I was the only person who existed. For once, I felt wanted.
You pushed my hair back out of my face, touched my bare body, and looked deep into my eyes. You told me that, “someone will love, but that someone isn’t me.”
Devastated was less than what I felt. I gathered my thoughts and my clothes and wiped my tears from my eyes and left.
I saw a future between us. Maybe I was too young and naive or maybe you shouldn’t have made me believe that I was loved by you. You deceived me.
I apologized once before. I said I was sorry for having those feelings. I’m sorry I believed that every touch, every kiss, every moment meant more to me than it did you. I wanted you. I craved your presence and to be with you.
I was just convenient, wasn’t I? I was someone who was there? Who cared for, supported you, and was the one who was there that was only there to inflate your ego in some sick way.
I felt things this whole time. I was human and had real emotions. You simply cannot be so intimate with someone without falling in love. At least I couldn’t. See, I was more than what you believed me to be.
I have more love inside me than you will ever have the chance to feel. Now, I’m sorry you’ll never be able to find someone who could love you the way I would have. You lost the one person who gave you a chance who believed you were more than what everyone else thought.
Maybe one day you’ll realize it but today is not the day and the day you do will be too late.