10 Important Tips to Keep Your Marriage Going
A wedding is easy to have but a marriage is not. Sustaining a marriage requires a long-term commitment towards surviving all the hardships together without letting your partner down. And yet, somewhere down the road, we forget what it takes to keep a marriage from falling apart. It’s very easy to get trapped in our day-to-day list of priorities and take the person we are living with for granted. Eventually, all it takes is one ugly fight to want to give up on your spouse. Below given are 10 important tips that will enable you to do whatever it takes to keep your relationship going:
Grow as a Person:
Try not being the same person at 45 that you were at 20. Work on yourself and grow as a person. And don’t expect your partner to be exactly the way he was twenty years ago.
Travel Together and Travel Separately:
Traveling together will compel you to depend on each other because you will be planning your trip as a team. It will also help you to get to know another side of your partner, which won’t be very evident in your everyday interactions with him. Traveling separately, once in a while, also helps in the sense that it gives both of you a chance to have different experiences and then share that experience with each other. It will also get both of you thinking about how it would have been, perhaps, a more enjoyable experience to have had that experience together.
Find Your Philosophy in Life:
All of us operate through some life philosophy or other. For example, some of us believe in fate while some follow their religious faith. What is important is to identify what philosophy governs all our thoughts and actions. Explore this philosophy and share it with each other.
Maintaining your physical health is a huge boost to one’s self-esteem and also influences your mental health in various positive ways. Exercising on a regular basis will enhance your outlook towards each other and make you feel more optimistic about the relationship.
Celebrate Your Achievements:
Find an excuse to raise a toast as a couple to every achievement, big and small. It could be an assignment submitted before its deadline or your favorite soccer team winning the match. All you must need is a reason to celebrate.
Motivate Each Other:
All of us have skeletons in our closet, doubts about our abilities and insecurities about our future. Your partner is one person you should feel absolutely comfortable to share these with, and vice versa. Motivate, encourage and help each other to firstly, discuss and then, overcome them.
Don’t Use the Coding Language:
Be straightforward with your partner. Avoid coding your words. Don’t expect him to understand the implied meaning of anything or to read between the lines. Communicate directly and clearly so there is no scope for miscommunication.
Don’t ponder over your past relationship or the beginning stages of your current relationship. Each relationship goes through different stages and experiences a different kind of romance as and when it develops. Being romantic does not have to include buying roses for you every week; even the simple things that he does such as putting your phone on charge when he sees the battery dying is romantic.
Both of You are Equally Good:
The minute one person in a relationship gets the feeling that they are superior to their partner, the relationship starts rolling down the hill. Knowing and accepting that you both are equals, regardless of who earns more or who has a more hectic schedule, is the key to enjoying a healthy and sustainable relationship. Never look down upon him or let him do that to you.
Use a Solution-focused Approach:
It’s very tempting to blame each other when you land in trouble. Words like “I told you so” slip off our tongue very easily before we have given it any thought. Criticizing each other is a convenient thing to do but doesn’t get either of you anywhere. Be a good teammate and offer solutions so that, together, both of you can figure a way out.
Even the most successful and healthiest of relationships will have couples experiencing moments when they feel like giving up. Each time you are overcome by the need to walk away, imagine yourself a few years from now without your partner. Imagine what exactly you would be doing, where you would be, and how you would be living your life. Will you be a happier person from what you are now? Or will you be regretting your decision to have quit in the past?