After we meet someone new, we often ask ourself how to start a conversation with a guy over text.
Today’s dating seems harder than in the past.
Since you have unlimited ways to meet guys in bars, clubs, and on social media, you have to wonder what the right approach to land the guy you like is.
Does today’s technology make it easier or harder to get to know the right one?
The answers to those questions depend on the individual.
Personally, I met the love of my life over social media, so I would never say that phones and dating apps are not good ways to make the first move.
Text messages are great ice-breakers, and they keep the conversation going if you are in a long-distance relationship.
That is the first step toward getting to know him better and vice versa.
Those first messages can be the cringiest ones. You use emojis, and send memes or GIFs so you can get to know his personality.
Maybe you throw a couple of flirty messages in there and before you know it, you are on a first date with a guy you like.
Seems simple, right? Well, some people don’t know how to start a conversation over a text.
However, you shouldn’t worry.
This article will deal with how to start a conversation with a guy over text, some of the dos and don’ts of texting, and signs that the guy likes you.
After reading them, it will be easy to start a conversation with a guy over a text.
Sometimes you need to focus on some physical signs that tell you whether a guy likes you or not.
There are a lot of conversation starters which I will go through later on, but for now, we need to determine whether this guy likes you.
Before shifting toward text conversation, you can always look out for physical signs if you are unsure about the guy and whether he even likes you.
Body language says more about a person than you think.
One of the simplest ways to tell whether a guy likes you or not is by observing his body language.
You can be sure that his feelings and thinking will match his body language, so carefully observe the signs.
Most women don’t realize that there are a lot of body language signs that show whether a guy is interested in them or not.
For example, his smile.
Him smiling is a major indication that a guy likes you. It is natural for a man to show his teeth and be happy around a girl he likes.
It will be almost impossible for a guy to hide his smile if he is around a girl he is interested in.
Smiling is rather a subconscious reaction to our inner feelings, which is why we don’t smile when we are sad.
If this guy is always in a great mood when he is around you and smiles a lot, then you can be sure that he is interested in you and you can ask him for his phone number.
Another way to physically tell whether a guy likes you is if he tries to find ways to touch you.
Let’s face it, you are an exceptional, gorgeous, good-looking girl who is a true magnet for guys. Who doesn’t want to touch you, right?
If you are wondering whether a guy likes you or not, then watch his hands.
A guy who is interested in you won’t be able to resist the temptation to touch you.
Maybe he puts his hand on your shoulder or on your knee or he brushes your cheek. Whatever it is that he does, you can be sure that he likes you.
Most of those touches will be subconscious, and he won’t even notice that he is doing it.
Eye contact is another way to tell.
You know that the eyes are windows to the soul, right?
If you’re unsure whether or not the guy likes you, watch his eyes closely, as if he likes you, he will make eye contact to try to look into your soul.
Holding eye contact helps build up an intimate connection with someone. He will lock his eyes with yours if he likes you.
This is easy to notice really. A guy will stare at you non-stop if he has feelings for you; it’s as simple as that.
You fascinate him so much that he cannot take his eyes off you.
If you are in a club and he only looks at you, you can be certain that he’s interested in you.
Go ahead and give him your phone number or social media profiles and wait for the first text to happen.
Now that you have taken the first step and you have realized that the guy likes you, you must be thinking about how to start a conversation with a guy over text.
It’s tough because there is no set of rules which you can follow and which guarantees your success.
You need to pay attention to the conversation flow.
If you are unsure of how to start a conversation with a guy over text, then pay attention to the following tips and tricks:
1. Be positive
Stay upbeat and remember, don’t send low energy text messages all the time.
I know that you have your bad days, everyone has them, but you should not be complaining to him all the time, as he might think your life is in chaos and it will turn him off.
If you want to start off on the right foot, keep in mind that you should be fun and positive so that your energy will transfer to him.
Ask him fun questions or send him some funny pics.
Whatever you do, don’t be depressing or sad all the time, and remember, you are trying to engage the guy and get him interested in you.
I know that it is a real problem for some people to learn how to drive a conversation through text messages.
It can be difficult but sometimes it is easier than having a face-to-face conversation.
So, you need to make an impression and show your witty and funny personality with your words or pics and maybe send him a couple of GIFs as a follow-up.
2. Approach him as a friend and not a date
It might scare you to hit on him through text messages, so the next thing you can do is stop thinking of it in a dating context, so think about him as a friend and not a potential suitor.
Don’t send him flirty text messages yet, but rather simple questions so you can get to know him better and show him that you respect him.
Believe me, guys sometimes want to have a casual conversation and they don’t mind talking to you as a friend.
Maybe you think that all the guys are the same and they only want one thing and that is to get you into the bedroom, but this is not the case.
Men are sometimes oblivious and sometimes they think, “Ooh, she’s a pretty girl.” You never know what they are thinking.
Even if he is physically attracted to you, that should not change a thing. Treat him as a friend and you might land the guy you like.
Throw in a couple of good morning texts and he will start to think, “Is she interested in me?”
3. Keep it casual and cool
I know it excites you every time he sends you a message because it’s from your crush, but sometimes being overly eager is a huge red flag to some guys.
Try to keep it cool and be calm. Don’t overwhelm him with long novels about how your day went if he only asked you how you are doing.
Maybe you’ll think he’s ghosting you if he doesn’t send a text back immediately.
However, that doesn’t give you the right to bombard him with messages.
Don’t double-text guys because it will scare them off and eventually, they will stop texting you.
Another red flag for guys is when girls play waiting games with them but know that you won’t reel him in by playing those stupid mind games.
If you can respond to his message, then just do it. Don’t make him wait.
Learn how to keep cool, calm, and collected, and believe me, he will want more from you.
You have to be patient and not let your emotions control your actions.
4. Let him control the flow of texting sometimes
I know that flirting through texts can be difficult or puzzling sometimes.
However, the best way to keep an interesting conversation alive is to have things to talk about.
Maybe you can ask him a couple of questions about his favorite movies or ask him something that will make him want to talk more.
Guys like to talk about themselves.
This is one of the best ice-breakers because it allows you to get to know him better without forcing him to text you back.
Ask him open-ended questions and let him do the texting. He will enjoy it, trust me.
Remember that guys don’t like to wait for a reply, just like women don’t, so be sure to pick up the phone and text him back.
If you don’t have time to text back properly, just send him a quick reply.
5. Start with a story
I have seen that most girls start a conversation with a guy by asking him questions.
While this is a great conversation starter, storytelling is another secret that very few girls use.
Sometimes questions make a conversation rather boring. Men lose interest and then they simply ghost you.
However, you can always use a story as a great conversation starter instead.
By doing so, you are actually telling him that you are a cool and interesting person, you’re not an ordinary girl who sent him a boring message.
You should be careful when picking the theme of the story.
Remember, you are a fun and interesting person and now, you need to convince him to believe you.
Don’t just pick random stories, pick those which he can relate to.
Maybe you went to the gym today and saw an interesting color on the same car he drives.
Now, this is a great story because it shows him that you think about him.
Another thing is that you went to the gym, which means you take care of your physical appearance.
It’s a no-brainer actually. It sends a different message about you if you tell him a story like this, something he can relate to.
Now, just see how boring this message would be instead: “Hey, what’s up?” Right?
Use stories to your advantage and soon, he will be hooked.
6. Always be confident
Many dating coaches will say, “Don’t text him first,” but that’s wrong in my opinion.
While you should not always be the first one to start a conversation, you have to put yourself out there and show him you are a confident person who knows she is worthy of love.
If you start a conversation first, he will see that you possess confidence and that you own it.
Believe me, guys are attracted to unique and confident girls and what can make you more memorable than being the first one to start a conversation.
Maybe send him a message like, “I can’t stop thinking about you since last time,” or, “I want to repeat our date.”
If you send a guy messages like these, he will feel attracted to you and he will feel flattered.
7. Ask him about his weekend plans
Be careful with this trick. It should not be used in the very first messages because it might scare the guy off.
If you have been on a couple of dates and you are unsure of how to start a conversation with a guy over text, then you can hit him up by saying, “What are you doing this weekend?”
This is a simple trick and an amazing conversation starter that most women think is useless but is effective because you are already subtly making plans for your next date and he will love that.
Maybe he is thinking about going on a hike and he asks you to join him on his adventures, and voila, you have yourself another date with this handsome guy.
Remember, knowing how to start a conversation with a guy over text is a skill that you can master.
Maybe you are still unsure about whether the guy wants something more serious with you, even after you have been on a couple of dates.
Maybe he doesn’t have much time to go on dates and you sit there thinking, “Does he like me or not?”
How can you tell that a guy likes you through texts? Well, here are just some signs that a guy is truly interested in you:
He wants to see you!
When a guy says he wishes you weren’t just texting, it means that he wants to see you and that he is interested in you.
He drops subtle hints that he would prefer face-to-face contact rather than communicating over text messages.
Maybe you say how excited you are for a new restaurant that opened last month, and he says that if he was there with you, he would take you there on a date.
He is making it pretty clear that he would rather do something other than communicating over text messages.
He texts you throughout the day.
Did you know that guys don’t enjoy texting too much? The only instance when they will text you throughout the day is when they truly like you.
It might not be every minute, but you get my point. If your conversation continues all day, it is a good sign that he likes you.
Most guys have a purpose when they’re texting. Maybe they want to find out information or make plans.
His messages might not be anything in particular, but he just wants to stay in touch with you and see how you are at that moment.
If he keeps the conversation going throughout the day, he is interested in you.
He tries to figure out whether you have a boyfriend.
Not too many guys will be this direct and send you a message like, “Hey, do you have a boyfriend?” but there are still those out there who will do this.
And if they do, then they are surely interested in you. Maybe they mention their single life and how they don’t enjoy it so much anymore.
If you look out for signs like these that he likes you, it will be pretty easy to notice them.
He teases you.
How many times did guys tease you when you were at school? Did you know that those guys teased you because they liked you?
Well, that is true, as guys have a habit of teasing girls when they are interested in them. A man will seek a girl’s attention by teasing her.
He compliments you.
Sometimes guys will give compliments when they don’t really mean them, but most of the time, they don’t do that.
A guy who genuinely likes you will compliment you on subtle things that you are not even aware of.
Maybe it is some old photo of you on a social media app, but he noticed it and that means he likes you.
Maybe his compliments are not even compliments but rather changes he’s noticed that you made recently, and he is aware of them because he saw them on your social media profiles.
Another thing that you have to remember is that guys are bad at giving compliments.
Just watch out for the things he says that could even remotely be viewed as compliments; for example, if he says that you have changed your hairstyle or something similar.
Now that you’ve figured out that the guy likes you and you’ve started a conversation, there are a few things you need to remember.
Certain things are off-limits and are huge red flags when texting a guy.
Watch out for sarcasm when texting him.
This is definitely one of the worst things about texting because sarcasm can come across as vulgar or insulting, unless you are a top-notch comedian who knows how to use sarcasm to their advantage.
Believe me, once he has been offended by something you say, there are no emojis or memes that you can send him to make up for it.
It’s best to leave sarcasm for face-to-face conversations and not include it in texting at all.
Drunk texts are an immense turn-off for guys.
It is never a good idea to text a guy under the influence, because terrible words may be said and you will regret it in the morning.
It might cause a terrible downfall in your attempt to land the guy you like.
Sometimes drunk texts are just funny and entertaining, but most of the time, you will regret sending them and wish it never happened.
Don’t send messages like, “Are you dating someone else?“
When you send a guy a text message like this, you mostly know in your gut that he is dating other people.
It also means that he wants nothing serious and wants to keep it casual between the two of you and you deserve better.
If he is serious about you, he will drop subtle hints that show he wants to only be with you and no one else.
Until then, don’t send him messages like this or ask him whom he is with as it will make the situation uncomfortable and he will reject you.
The last thing you should remember is to never send multiple messages if he has not responded yet.
The easiest way to turn a guy off is to send him a couple more messages during the day when he has not even responded to the first one.
Sometimes guys are busy and don’t have time, but if he has not responded to your messages and it has been a couple of days, then you should probably move on because he is clearly not interested.
Just don’t do multiple texting. It will make you seem desperate and needy and you don’t want that.
Simply move on because there are plenty of other fish in the sea.
Figuring out how to start a conversation with a guy over text is tough, but just remember the dos and don’ts and you will be fine.