There’s a question we would all love to know the answer to; how to give him space but not lose him at the same time?
We all know how men work. They love their freedom and hate it when they feel like they’re trapped.
A lot of times, the bare thought that he may lose his own space scares him and you can see that he starts to become distant toward you. He takes a step back and moves away from you for a bit because he’s scared of losing his independence.
At that point, every woman gets afraid that she may lose the man she loves so dearly. So, she wants to do whatever she can in order to show him that he can have his own space even though he’s in a relationship.
But there’s a tricky part; how do you give him space without risking losing him at the same time? If you pull away more than you should, he may think that you no longer love him the same way.
This could make him leave you but if you don’t give him enough space, he may feel like he’s trapped in a cage.
How do you find the right balance?
You don’t want your man to feel suffocated by your constant presence but you also don’t want to be left without him. That’s the reason why you have to figure out what will work best for both of you!
How to give him space but not lose him at the same time?
Believe it or not, there are many different ways you can achieve this. You can successfully give your man enough space and make him feel comfortable in the relationship and at the same time, you won’t face the risk of losing him.
Apply these tips to your relationship right away and you’ll see a huge difference in no time.
1. Stop calling him all the time
Do you want to know how to give him space but not lose him? Well, the first thing you need to have in mind is that you shouldn’t be calling him every second of the day.
I know that you want to hear his voice and share with him what happens to you but could that wait until you get home? Do you really have to call him non-stop?
In your eyes, this may seem like a normal thing to do. However, to him, it feels like you’re checking up on him and making sure you know every move he makes.
And let me tell you that guys hate that feeling. They despise being overwhelmed by your constant calls and messages that don’t stop coming.
He would rather get on with his day and then once he’s free, hell call you to check on you and see how your day was.
So, if you tone down your habit of bombarding him with your calls and texts, you’ll notice an immediate change in his behavior. A change for the better.
2. Stop asking him about every move he makes
What are you doing right now? Where are you and who’s with you?
These questions drive him crazy at the very least. There’s no need for you to ask all those unnecessary questions.
No one wants to feel like they’re being interrogated about their own life. And your need to know every move he takes makes him feel exactly that way.
If you trust him enough, then there’s no reason why you should be familiar with every second of his day. And if you don’t have trust in him then that’s a whole other issue.
So, give this man space to breathe on his own and stop being too intrusive about every move he makes. If he wants to share his day with you, he’ll do that himself.
3. Have your own life
If you want to give him enough space while being sure that you won’t lose him, then you need to lead your own life.
Just because you’re in a relationship, it doesn’t mean that you should set everything else aside. Your life shouldn’t be on pause just because you found yourself a man.
Go out with your friends, spend your time enjoying your hobbies, and focus on your own well-being.
All these things will help you gain confidence and improve your quality of life. At the same time, you may even impress him with your independence.
Trust me, men are fans of women who know what they want from life and who can do things on their own. A high-value woman will always gain more recognition than a clingy or needy one.
So, it’s up to you to choose which you want to be.
4. Know the limits
Snooping through his phone has nothing to do with giving him space. If anything, you’re only violating his privacy.
Just because you desperately want to know who he’s talking to, it doesn’t mean that you’re allowed to check his phone. You’ll have to respect some limits, especially when you’re trying to give him more space.
When a guy feels ready to open up about something, he’ll do that on his own. Also, you’ll feel much better about yourself if you see that he’s sharing details from his life with you because he actually wants to do that.
Feeling that you know what’s going on in his life because he wants to confide in you is much more satisfying than knowing the same info only because you snooped through his things.
5. Don’t be too available
If you’re too available and always there for him, a guy will see you as clingy. This is especially if you’re at the very beginning of your relationship.
That’s why it’s important to find the right balance between being there for him when he needs you and knowing when to pull away for some time. This is how you give him space but make sure not to lose him at the same time.
This doesn’t mean that you’re supposed to ignore him and stop picking up your phone every time he calls you. But you should show him that you have other things in your life as well.
This will give him the impression that you won’t be calling him 24/7 because you have nothing else to do. And we all know that men dread this feeling.
6. Stop nagging
When you’re trying to give your man space, you also have to keep in mind that you should stop nagging him. That’s one of the reasons why he needs to pull away in the first place.
Whenever you keep reminding him of something he still hasn’t done, you actually make him resent you.
Every time you repeat your complaints, he wishes to move away from you further and further. His need for space grows greater and greater.
So, the best thing you can do right now is stop nagging him. Even if it’s driving you crazy that it’s been two days and he still hasn’t taken the trash out, reminding him won’t do you any good.
If anything, it’ll only make this task even harder to accomplish because he knows how desperately you want him to do it.
7. Make sure you’re not moving too quickly in the relationship
How to give him space but not lose him? Try by making sure that your relationship isn’t moving too fast.
Most guys are afraid of commitment. They’re afraid of settling down with one woman for different reasons.
So, every time he feels like your relationship is moving too fast, he’ll seek more space. But if you take things slowly and show him that you won’t rush him into something he’s not ready for, your man will appreciate that.
He’ll get the space he needs without living in fear that you’ll make him move in together before he’s ready to do that.
Always have in mind that a relationship should be comfortable for both partners. Both your wishes and his should be respected.
Just because you’re ready to take the next step, it doesn’t mean that your man feels the same way. And you should never pressure him into something he’s not ready for.
8. Stop making decisions for him
If you want to know how to give him space but not lose him at the same time, you should consider the way you make decisions for him. Are you guilty of thinking that you know best what it is he should be doing?
If your answer is yes, then you need to stop doing this right away.
How many times have you told him that he should do something? How many times have you made a decision for him, without considering his opinion first?
Even if you think that you’re doing him a favor, in a way, you’re treating him as if he’s a child.
Why should you make decisions for a grown man who knows what he wants? This makes no sense and you should stop doing it immediately.
Show him that you won’t get involved in his decision-making unless he wants you to. Let him see that you trust him completely.
That way, you’ll also give him enough space to lead his life the way he wants.
9. Stop trying to change him
Again, you may have the best intentions when you show him that you want him to change something about himself. You may think that you’re doing it because you want him to become the best person he can be.
However, that’s not how he will see your need to change him.
Instead, he may feel like you’re trying to shape him into your ideal boyfriend. He may think that you’re taking his freedom away from him.
So, the moment you stop trying to make him change anything, no matter whether it’s regarding his looks or personality traits, he’ll feel like you’re giving him space.
He’ll have the impression that you finally feel happy about everything he is and that there’s nothing you would change about him.
And that’s the only right way partners should feel in a relationship. They should know that their significant other appreciates them just the way they are, even though they’re not perfect.
The point is that he’s found someone who loves him with all of his flaws and you have no intention of leaving him because of them.
10. Accept the fact that he has other things in life, besides your relationship
When you want to give him space and be sure that you won’t lose him, you need to be mindful that you can’t be the only priority in his life.
Your relationship won’t be the only thing he’ll have to take care of. There’s his work, his friends and family, and his own well-being.
All those aspects of his life depend on him and he can’t put everything aside just because he’s in a relationship.
There will be some times when he’ll have to cancel your date night because his mother isn’t feeling well. Sometimes, you won’t be able to see him every day of the week because he has a lot of work to do.
Those things are a normal part of life and you should never make him feel bad about them. You should never act like he doesn’t love you just because he can’t give you every second of his free time.
Instead, you should be his biggest support and you should understand where he’s coming from.
Don’t make him feel as if he has to put all of his time and energy into you because that’s simply impossible.
Instead, appreciate all those moments you spend together and show him that you won’t get mad at him just because he couldn’t take you out the night before.
After that, he’ll realize that he has himself the best woman ever. Someone who supports him and understands him, no matter what.
11. Let him have time for himself
How to give him space but not lose him? Simply let him know that he should always have some time for himself.
We should start normalizing the fact that men need some alone time too. It shouldn’t be something reserved for women only.
Does he want to spend a weekend alone? Does he feel the need to hang out with his buddies?
Does he feel like not talking to anyone for a couple of hours? All these things should be respected by you, as it doesn’t mean that he loves you any less than he did.
He simply needs to spend some time the way he wants and you should never be the one to say no to that.
How would you feel if he told you that you can’t go out with your friends even though you desperately need to talk to them? Well, he would feel the same way if you did anything similar to him.
Respect his wish to be away from you for a while and he’ll start to crave you even more. Balance is the key in everything, you should never forget that.
12. Stop being jealous
Jealousy makes him want to pull away from you right away. If he sees you having attacks of jealousy every time he mentions the name of some girl, you can bet that he’ll seek some space away from you.
Unnecessary nagging about the girls he hangs out with won’t help you. If you truly believe that his behavior is inappropriate then you should have an actual conversation with him.
However, acting jealous every time he mentions another woman isn’t the way to go. This suffocates your man and makes him want to get away from you.
So, as soon you stop being jealous, you’ll give him space at the same time. And I suppose that you want to achieve that, since you’re reading this article.
13. Don’t force him into doing things he doesn’t like
Just because you’re a fan of something, it doesn’t mean that he’s supposed to like the same things as you do. So, every time you pressure him to do something he’s not fond of, you’re actually pushing him away from yourself.
If you instead give him enough space to do the things he wants, you’ll get yourself a changed man who’ll love spending his time with you.
In that case, even if he doesn’t like hiking, he’ll be open to going with you since you haven’t been pressuring him to do so.
The decision is his and he’ll want to spend his time with you, strengthening your relationship by doing something new and exciting.
In these circumstances, both of you win. You get a guy who does things with you because he genuinely wants to and he gets a woman who doesn’t pressure him to do things he doesn’t like.
That’s how you create a healthy relationship that works for both of you.
14. Don’t stalk him
“What were you doing yesterday with your pals? I saw you at that bar where your ex always hangs out!”
“Who’s that girl whose picture you liked? Are you talking to her?”
Doing this shows that you’re stalking him and it’s completely opposite from giving him space.
So, if you want to give him some room to breathe and show him that you’re not obsessed with him, you need to stop following every move he makes.
You’re not only making him feel like he’s in some sort of a trap. You’re also making things harder for yourself as you’ll spend every second of your day wondering what’s he doing, who’s he with, and whether you can trust him.
That way, you’ll be putting yourself in a toxic relationship that doesn’t have anything beneficial to offer.
Once you stop stalking him, you’ll show him that you’re giving him space because you’re aware that it doesn’t mean that you’re losing him.
He’ll appreciate his time on his own and you’ll also feel much happier on the inside. Constant checking up on him and what he’s doing only makes your life harder and no one wants that.
So, take a deep breath and relax. Let him lead his own life and have trust in his actions.
If his choice is to betray your trust, he’ll do that no matter what and your constant worrying or asking questions won’t change anything.
15. Make him miss you
When you want to know how to give him space but not lose him, you need to make sure that your actions will make him miss you as well. You need to make him reach out to you because he misses your presence.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that you’re supposed to disappear from his life completely and make him put his best efforts into chasing after you.
It actually means that you need to give him enough space that he’ll spend on his own, while you’ll still be there to show him that your feelings are the same.
At some point, he’ll remember how much fun he always has with you and you’ll see him running into your arms as if you haven’t seen each other in a year.
That’s how you’ll know that giving him space actually works and that you haven’t lost him, not even for a second.
16. Stop worrying that you may lose him
When you want to give a man some space, you always need to have in mind that worrying won’t get you anywhere. If anything, it can only make it harder for you to lead a normal life.
Just because you decided to give him some space, it doesn’t mean that he’ll walk away from you. Just because you give him enough room to breathe, it doesn’t mean that you won’t see him ever again.
If you love him, the only thing you can do is trust him. And eventually, he’ll realize how much you mean to him and he’ll be back in your arms in no time.
So, stop worrying right now because you can’t lose him by giving him space.
He can only use that as an excuse to walk away from you. But in that case, it’s something that he’s been planning to do for a while anyway.