How many divorced couples get back together?
There should be several people out there that can give you some type of reassurance that your broken heart can be mended. So many times, people divorce their partner without wanting to resort to that.
One of you was willing to work on your relationship. One of you probably saw the potential in your marriage, so you didn’t want to break it off. But here we are. You’re heartbroken and he seems to be moving on.
If you’ve been through a divorce, you know how hard it can be. There were so many things that you shared with your ex-spouse and now you’re all alone. You feel like a big chunk of your life is missing.
There’s nothing that you can do right now to make all the issues go away, but you’re still wondering if there’s a chance that you could find your way back.
Now, it’s time for you to consider why you’re even asking yourself how many divorced couples actually get back together. Do some digging within yourself to find out if this is just a fleeting emotion or if it’s your genuine need.
We’ll answer your questions, but you need to make sure that you’re ready for the information we’re about to give you.
How many divorced couples get back together?
Dr. Nancy Kalish performed research with 1001 participants in her renowned Lost Love Project. You can find all the necessary information about this on her official website.
Results showed that only 6% of all participants got married, divorced, and then remarried to the same person.
That’s a devastatingly low number of people if you ask me, but it’s also quite high at the same time if we consider the fact that these people decided at one point to go their separate ways. They lost their love for each other at one point, or they just lost the motivation to put effort into their marriage.
Some people never lost their love for their spouse.
There’s a theory that rekindled love is a timeless phenomenon that’s worthy of our attention.
We all know someone who chose divorce over working on their marriage. I mean, most couples simply aren’t meant for one another. Even though we think the problems we go through in a relationship are tough, marital problems are much worse and they need more effort and attention.
Once you start to live with your spouse, financial challenges start to occur, together with issues that were not dealt with on time. Even the couples who had open communication develop issues that they can’t work out.
But there’s an old saying that goes, where there was a fire there’s still ashes. It means that if you were in love with someone once, you won’t be able to clean up the mess you made.
You’re trying to start a new life without your spouse but you feel like a huge part of you is still missing. To some people (meaning that 6%), they can’t imagine a life without that person.
To them, it’s easier to get back together than to continue without their ex. Those people were ready to work through their differences together instead of waiting for their life to go back to normal.
People can deal with their marital issues quite easily if they decide to bring a professional into the game. That’s why couples therapy is a great starting point.
Maybe you could be part of that 6% if there’s mutual love and respect left between the two of you. But you shouldn’t even try to do this just because you miss the familiarity of being with him. You may end up so much happier by yourself if you just learn how.
Will re-marrying your ex help you find happiness?
There’s no specific data about people who decided to re-marry their ex-spouse out there. It’s hard to make this research. However, there’s other info to help us gain a better perspective.
For example, 60-67% of second marriages end in divorce, while more than 73% of third marriages end in divorce. These may seem like harsh statistics, but they can also be interpreted as encouraging.
What you need to understand is that every couple is different. There are many couples out there who are more than able to make things work. You could be one of those lucky people if you know how to approach this situation.
Some good news is Dr. Kalish’s data shows that the people who re-marry their ex-spouse are much happier. Their entire relationship depends on their willingness to work on their relationship together.
Now that they’ve gotten a second chance at love, they feel like they can’t afford to let it go. That’s why they try hard to get better at listening and loving each other.
You need to resolve all of your previous issues to live the life you want. You can’t get the marriage you desire by being passive and simply waiting for it to get better.
This is a very emotional time for both partners. It’s tough to let go of someone that you’ve gone through so much with. It’s understandable not to want to move on because you know that there’s no one better out there for you.
Should you go back to your ex or try to meet someone new?
When looking at the small number of divorced couples who get back together, you also start to wonder if it’s easier to find someone new.
You love your ex, but it could also just be the fact that you’ve never had to live a life without him. Now, your being is trying to adjust to all the newness and unfamiliarity.
But, you see, you’re the only one who can answer this question. You can’t expect a random person online to give you the answer.
You know how he makes you feel. You’re the one who knows everything that you’ve been through. So, now, all that’s left to do is make this decision all over again.
If you think that he’s the man for you, then go back to him and don’t listen to anything anyone’s telling you. But if you know that nothing good can come from this, then sorry to say it, but it’s time to move on.