When the guy you love hurts you, the only thing you feel is pain. And no matter how many times he says he’s sorry, you keep thinking about his mistake.
Did you deserve to be treated that way? Did you do something that made him hurt you in the first place?
Was this all your fault? You keep thinking about these things over and over again, without a way to find the right answers.
It looks like he’s actually sorry for his deeds. He knows that he made a mistake and you can see the regret in his eyes.
But your mind is still leading a battle against itself. While your heart feels ready to forgive him, your head keeps repeating the bad moves he made.
Torn apart, you feel like you’re losing control.
You keep blaming yourself for feeling this way. If you already told him that you forgive him, then why do you keep thinking about the things he did to you?
Why do you keep living in the past, feeding on his mistakes? You keep having phases of a love-hate relationship with yourself.
In one moment, you feel like your emotions are reasonable. You feel like you’re only trying to protect yourself and there’s nothing wrong with that.
Other times, you keep hating on yourself for overthinking the moments when you felt like your heart was about to break from something your boyfriend did to you.
“He said he’s sorry!”
You repeat these words to yourself as if they’re your mantra. You keep trying to forgive him but your mind doesn’t seem to listen to you.
No matter how many excuses you find for his bad behavior, your mind fails to fall for them. Instead, it keeps reminding you that this guy hurt you like no one else ever did and you can’t ignore that.
And this is the tricky part. Once someone betrays your trust, regaining it takes a long time, and sometimes, it doesn’t happen at all.
Maybe you’re walking down that path back to trust right now. Maybe you’re trying to forgive your guy for treating you the way he wasn’t supposed to.
But it’s turning out to be pointless.
This other part of you wants to move away from him. It wants to leave him in the past and cross off his name forever.
So what do you do? How do you take a step that will be good for you in the long run?
You still love this person, even though he hurt you like no one else ever did. You keep recalling all those happy moments you spent together and you can’t seem to forget about them.
This guy was there for you when he needed him the most. But he also did something he wasn’t supposed to, he did something which tore your heart apart and made it hard to breathe.
What do you do now? How do you make the right move, the one that won’t cost you your happiness or sanity?
Well, before you make that decision, you need to know something.
When you’re trying to forgive someone for the things they did to you, you need to have in mind that some actions are irreversible. You need to be aware that some things can’t be forgotten with a simple, “I’m sorry.”
If he cheated on you, the fact that he expressed his regret doesn’t change the fact that he replaced you with another woman. It doesn’t change the fact that he betrayed your trust with someone else.
He could’ve easily broken up with you and chose someone else. He could’ve told you that he didn’t love you anymore and save you from the pain.
Instead, he went behind your back and replaced your arms with the arms of another woman. He gave her his time and comforted her with his kisses.
He whispered sweet nothings in her ears and made sure to answer her calls instead of yours. And he chose to do all those things willingly, without any pressure to do so.
So, the fact that he said he’s sorry doesn’t really change much. It only hurts you even more that you were the one to forgive him for his actions just because he said a couple of sweet words to you.
Because of that, your mind is in a constant fight with your heart. Deep down, you know what he did to you.
You’re well aware of the way he broke you in two but your heart still loves him and is having a hard time letting go of him. Your heart still thinks that you can forgive him for his actions because he said he’s sorry.
I know that you have no idea what you should be doing right now. You have no idea how to move on after this.
If you accept what he did, there’s a high chance that all of the love you feel for him will turn into resentment. There’s a possibility that you’ll start hating him once your feelings settle down.
You know that he did a bad thing. You know that he hurt you the way no one ever else did.
And because of that, it’s only normal that you feel torn apart. It’s fine that you don’t know what’s the right thing to do.
Don’t blame yourself for your emotions just because he expressed his regret. His, “I’m sorry,” doesn’t change the fact that he hurt you and there’s nothing you can do about that.
If you truly think that the two of you can move on, then you should go down the path of forgiveness. But if you know that his mistake will keep you up at night, then you better break things off with him.
He may be truly sorry for what he did to you but it doesn’t guarantee you that he won’t do it again. So this time, you should be strong enough to choose yourself.
This time, do whatever it takes to end up happy. Your own well-being should be your priority, from now on and forever…