When is it enough? At what point will a woman draw the line when it comes to the man she loves?
Love is such a dangerous thing. This feeling that makes us so anxious to lose someone that we forgive that person more times than they obviously deserve.
He’s one of those people who never once deserved your forgiveness. Your love for him deceived you into believing that he was going to learn from his mistakes.
You thought that if you put more effort into it, if you tried just a tiny bit harder, that things would fall back into place. You wanted to help him, heal him, show him that it’s possible for a person to change, but that was obviously not true.
He would make a mistake, you’d go out of your mind, he’d apologize and manipulate you into believing that it wouldn’t happen again. So you forgave him, again and again.
You forgave him because you thought that you could fix all of his cracks if you just tried harder to fill them with your own love.
I know exactly how you feel. Women take care of their boyfriends and husbands as if it’s a job that we get paid for.
However, that makes us forget to take care of ourselves.
We’re compassionate to the point where we think that they need time to figure things out. We think that they’re going to change if we just give them enough time.
No one can change their behavior or their habits overnight. You yourself had some issues in this relationship and you fixed them but you simply thought that he might need a little bit more time.
What you forget to understand is that the same mistake can happen once or twice and not more than that. After that, it’s an obvious choice the person makes to hurt you.
You try to talk to him and it gets more and more exhausting every single time.
I’ve been there myself and it was always the same thing. I gave up after I felt my voice get raw from all the explaining I had to do.
He’d get home in the late hours of the night, he’d give me a brief description of where he had been and who he had been with, but that was it.
In the morning, I’d try to get him up to have coffee with me (because he promised multiple times that we’d spend this short time together) and then he’d yell at me for waking him up.
He would never tell me why he did what he did. Not even when I tried to talk about it with him.
It always started with a nice conversation because I hated conflict. However, I knew that I had to actually confront him about these issues, so I told him that I didn’t appreciate it when he avoided me like that.
What was I supposed to think? Of course, I thought that he was cheating on me on a daily basis because of this.
What would you think if you were in my place? I had no other choice but to believe he was finding what he needed in someone else.
You can imagine how much of a toll it took on my mental health to have to go through that for months. Before that, we had issues that were smaller but this one made me rethink my entire relationship.
A few things never changed and one of them was the fact that he couldn’t be bothered to listen to me.
I tried to talk to him about this one too many times and he always told me that he’d try to do better next time or he’d just get mad at me and then we wouldn’t talk for days.
The last day of our relationship, my boyfriend didn’t come home the entire night. I texted his friend, asking him if he knew where he was, and he told me that he took him home because he was too intoxicated to actually go home to me.
I felt guilty for what he was doing to himself.
Was it my fault? Was he so repulsed by me that he couldn’t even look at me?
This entire situation hurt me so much, so on the last morning of our relationship, I packed all my things.
I didn’t even leave a note for him. I knew he’d see that all my things were gone.
You shouldn’t give second chances to people who make the same mistakes over and over again. This rule should apply to your friends, family members, and especially to the romantic partner you want to spend the rest of your life with.
I’m probably not the best example of that rule, as someone who gave way too many second chances. But I think that you can learn from my mistake and you can save yourself.
Save yourself from a man who doesn’t want to change. He doesn’t care about you enough to show you that he’ll do his best to be worthy of you.
He thinks that you’re the problem for even having an issue with him. That’s exactly why he continues to make the same mistakes.
In his mind, he isn’t doing anything wrong, so he’ll continue to live his life according to his own standards. Your wants and needs aren’t important to him.
He’s made his choice. Make your choice now.
Show him that no one can treat you like that. He made too many choices that drew you away from him so he may as well watch your back as you walk away from him.
Choose yourself instead of choosing to give him another chance that he obviously doesn’t deserve. You can do so much better.
You can find someone who’ll make sure to make you happy, because that someone will know that you’re not asking him to give you the stars from the night sky.
You’re asking for some time spent together and some basic human decency.
If he’s not able to give you these simple things, then he doesn’t deserve you at all. You’re so much better off without him.
Find your own happiness, because you deserve so much better than him.