Dear couples, I know that the world is full of judgmental people. And it’s understandable that many couples try to stay in the safe zone, but dare to be different.
In today’s world, there are many dating trends that are popular among couples. But here’s the thing: If you don’t like those trends, there’s no need to follow them. No one needs to feel obliged to build their relationship the way other people do.
Here I’ve prepared five popular dating trends you don’t need to follow to be in a healthy relationship.
1. Posting each other on social media
Posting about your romantic relationship on social media seems to be something completely harmless, right? Practically everyone is doing it, so it’s probably something that’s a must for couples? Why wouldn’t you share your happy moments and best pics from your last trip…? Well, there’s another side to this trend.
What if I tell you that this can actually hurt your relationship?
Stop waiting for other people’s approval. It’s nice to see all those likes and sweet little comments about your partner, but you don’t need their validation. The moment you start depending on your followers to make you feel good about your relationship, your relationship has entered dangerous territory.
A relationship is meant to be between you and your partner. If you decide to share it with the rest of the world, it can affect this balance. The feeling of intimacy and privacy will be almost gone. That’s because your relationship will now be between you, your partner, and everyone else you have on your social media.
So think about what I’ve just said. Talk to your partner and decide whether you’d like to keep your relationship private or not. However, make sure that the decision is completely yours and your partner’s. Don’t feel pressured to follow the trends just to fit in with the social norms.
2. Taking things slow
We have all been through this “we’ve just met” phase. You go out, you meet someone, but you soon realize that you actually already like that person. And the feelings are mutual! Isn’t it amazing?
You don’t feel the butterflies in your belly – you have a whole zoo! Then comes thinking about them all the time, planning the next date, imagining what the two of you will be doing and talking about. Maybe you even ignored other people, because you’re just smitten by this person.
However, people start telling you that it’s too early. Too early for what? A relationship, physical contact, feeling this way? “Everything,” they say.
You’ve already heard that rushing into things this early can mess everything up. But you really like him, you don’t want to keep waiting.
So you’re stuck. Stuck between what you want and what other people consider to be normal. “Should I cool it down a little and try and take things slow?”
It’s completely up to you and your partner. The trends that have been going around shouldn’t define your relationship. It’s okay to behave according to your feelings. If you feel that you’re ready for the next step, feel free to do so. At the end of the day, it’s your life – your rules.
3. Obsessing over astrology
“Oh no, you’re a Sagittarius, and he’s a Taurus!? Run girl, the two of you are definitely incompatible.”
“Wow! You’re both Leos!? Amazing compatibility.”
Have you heard similar advice before? Chances are, you did. There may be a measure of truth behind astrology, but it’s far too more complicated than “Okay, you’re compatible with this sign, and not with that one.”
This is a huge trend nowadays, but definitely not one you should start obsessing over. We all have our unique natal charts that show us the placements of other planets and can tell a lot more about our personalities. But, it’s not something that’s always true!
For instance, it’s a known fact that people born under the sign of Taurus are very stubborn. However, if they love you, they will always be ready to compromise. So this shows that not everything that is written there is a golden rule.
If you really like someone, don’t give up just because astrology said the two of you won’t succeed. I know many people with incompatible signs who are now very happy families.
4. Dating only specific types of people
Have you ever heard that someone is not good enough for you because that person doesn’t have the same background as yours?
People tend to judge the relationships in which one partner is more successful than the other. After this, you might feel pressured to find a suitable partner according to what other people consider to be desirable. This shouldn’t be the case when you’re trying to find the love of your life.
If you constantly date specific types of people, you might miss out on some really great experiences. Don’t feel the need to date only people on the same educational level as you are, or ones with well-paid jobs. You never know what someone is capable of.
So if you really like someone who doesn’t “meet the requirements,” don’t give up just because some granny told you he/she is not a desirable partner. When there’s love in the relationship, everything is possible and you can achieve great things together.
5. Having a backup plan
Another trend that you should think twice about before practicing, is having a backup plan.
It means that you’re talking to someone you really like, but you still have a number of people in the line, just in case this one doesn’t work out well.
Just imagine the opposite situation. You really like someone, but that person actually has a whole list of potential relationship candidates. How would that make you feel? Sad? Betrayed? Disappointed? One thing is for sure, it wouldn’t make you happy.
So think about whether it’s okay for you to follow this trend or not. If you’re looking for a relationship, it should be built on trust and mutual respect, and this is definitely not a good start.