Think aloud
More and more people choose to use a breakup text to end things with their partners.
There is a moral dilemma surrounding this issue where we ask ourselves if this is truly the right way to end things.
You’ve been in a relationship with this person for so long and now you decide to leave them without even confronting them?
Breaking up with someone is never easy. Sometimes there wasn’t anything that went wrong. You just feel like you could do better.
People break up for small reasons, while others sometimes stay even after realizing how awfully toxic their relationship actually is.
To break up with someone over text doesn’t make it any easier on you. You have to prepare yourself to separate with someone who at one stage meant a lot to you.
You thought that you’d be together for the rest of your life. Or maybe they were just a quick fix for you and now you’re wondering how to get rid of them.
That’s the case that many of us have found ourselves in.
Either way, you need the perfect breakup text. You need a text that conveys your emotions properly without being too desperate, but also not too cold.
So what do you text them to get your message across? You want them to understand things without having to explain them in further detail.
Sometimes you don’t really have a choice, since you’re in a long-distance relationship. You can’t just fly out just to break up with them.
Is it okay to send a breakup text?
So is it really alright to use texting as a means to break up with someone? This is a great question almost everyone has asked themselves at least once.
You might have already broken up with someone this way. It must have been tough and you still don’t know how to feel about it.
For better or for worse, technology has totally flipped the dating scene.
Today, many people choose to break up over text because it’s convenient.
It lets the person hide behind a screen while they break their girlfriend or boyfriend’s heart.
It’s easier because you don’t have to look at someone when the pain hits them.
If you had to see their pain, it would haunt you for the rest of your life.
So why would anyone want to endure that? It’s so much easier to just send a text message.
This doesn’t mean that it’s alright.
Breaking up with someone over text says a lot about you.
It more often than not says that you’re a coward who doesn’t respect their partner enough to break the news in person.
Especially, if you’re able to see your partner without any problems. You can meet up and break up with them properly, and not hide behind a screen.
To think about whether or not it’s okay to break up over text is still up to you. I guess it does depend on the individual situation.
How does breaking up over text impact the sender?
Are you surprised to learn that sending a breakup text can impact you negatively as well?
There have been studies that show how the person who makes a habit of breaking up with people over texts has less empathy.
You’re avoiding seeing the impact that your words and actions have. And they carry so much power and weight.
So when you send them over text, you lose your connection to them. You lose the ability to empathize with the person.
Basically, this habit can slowly but surely impact your humanity.
Even though a face-to-face breakup is anything but comfortable, you really have to try to understand the shock, anger, and sadness your partner goes through.
A heartfelt, considerate breakup will show you how to appreciate someone else’s feelings more.
If you don’t have this, then you’ll end up being dismissive of others’ emotions.
The best thing you can do is sit down with your partner in a quiet place and talk things through with them.
You can’t just expect them to understand you without explaining yourself. They need to know why this is happening.
At least, they need some honest feedback so that they don’t make the same mistakes again with future partners.
You, on the other hand, might suffer just as much as they do through this process.
You can’t just expect your partner to cry their eyes out while you stay indifferent.
They can’t suffer alone. You’re losing them as well, so experience all those emotions with them. It’s the most human thing out there.
Some unsolicited breakup advice
Don’t just jump into writing the easiest, most cliche breakup text out there and think that you’re done with it.
If you’ve gone on more than five dates, the other person deserves more than that.
And if you’ve dated for months or years, a breakup text really shouldn’t be an option.
However, there are a few rules even when you’re breaking up with them via text. You can’t just send the text and wipe your hands clean.
First of all, make sure to pick the right time.
For example, if your partner is going through a rough time and they’re experiencing a lot of emotional stress, they don’t need you to add to it all by breaking up with them right then and there.
Pick a suitable time to send that breakup text.
Secondly, don’t say anything to anyone until the deed is done.
Can you imagine if your partner found out that you were going to break up with them before you even send that text?
You should really keep your plans private until you actually send that text message.
Don’t go around talking about it like it’s everyone’s business.
The third rule is to be kind and honest.
It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together, they still deserve your kindness.
It doesn’t matter if you fought all the time, this is your last chance to make things right and walk out of their life with a clean slate.
Don’t call them names, don’t throw insults around. Make this as painless and honest as humanly possible.
30+ tactful breakup texts
If you still decide to break up with your partner over text, you have to be delicate with them.
I think the speech I made about how wrong this entire situation is was enough for you to reconsider.
However, if you still want to go through with your plan, you might need a little inspiration for this.
Don’t just send them a text that breaks their heart without even explaining yourself.
Maybe you want to add your reasoning to your text messages before you even decide to type out the fact that they’re single now?
That part is, of course, up to you.
Sending someone a breakup text isn’t the easiest thing to do, so I’m going to help you.
You can take these examples as inspiration for your own text message.
I wish you the best of luck.
1. “I hope you’ll find it in you to forgive me for breaking your heart, but I know that there’s someone out there better for you. I can’t be your special someone anymore.”
2. “Maybe we weren’t ready for this relationship. I know that I wasn’t. So instead of dragging you along with me, it’s better if we break up right now. Please don’t be sad because of this, we just weren’t meant to be together.”
3. “I would love to say that I’m sorry, but I’m really not. I simply don’t deserve your love and kindness anymore, and I’m happy that you’ll be free of me. I’m breaking up with you and I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me one day.”
4. “Let’s finally face it: This isn’t working anymore. It breaks me to think that I won’t be able to call you mine anymore, but it’s better for the both of us. Please understand this and don’t hate me too much.”
5. “Sometimes people meet, not to love each other, but to teach each other a lesson. Think of our encounter like that. We’re a little wiser than we were before. We taught each other what we had to and now you need to let me leave. We need to break up because this simply isn’t working anymore.”
6. “Please don’t think that this is leaving me indifferent. I’m in just as much pain as you are! The problem is that I haven’t stopped loving you, I simply don’t trust that we’re right for each other. I hope you understand that, as well.”
7. “I don’t regret us. If you think that I do, please think again. I would never regret the things that we went through or the love that we had for each other. Please don’t regret this either. We loved each other and we grew into better people. There’s an entire life waiting for you out there and I feel like I’m just holding you back. I’m breaking up with you. You don’t have to wait for me any longer. You’re free to find your happiness elsewhere.”
8. “I’m not happy with you anymore. And say what you like, I see that you’re not happy with me either. We make each other miserable! Please let’s stop this. I can’t do this anymore, I want to be happy again. I want you to be happy again. There’s no way we can truly feel that when we’re together.”
9. “I don’t want to do this anymore. We stay together because we’re scared of being alone! I don’t want to fight and cry every damn day. Let’s just end this now before my heart breaks into a million pieces. Goodbye.”
10. “We’re simply not meant to be together. We’re not meant to love each other. You should love someone who doesn’t make you cry and I should love someone who understands me. We can’t find someone like that unless we break up, so this is it. This is the last time I’ll text you. I hope you find your happiness.”
11. “Stop telling me that we can fix this! We can’t. It’s hopeless, can’t you see? We have to break up and we have to do it now. I don’t want to fight this battle anymore because there’s no winner here. We’re both losing if we stay together.”
12. “You’re right when you say that I’m selfish, careless, and childish. But when you say that I don’t love you, you’re mistaken. I love you, I just can’t do this anymore. I’ll probably love you and cry over you for years to come, but I won’t stay here and let myself be hurt by you. No one deserves that. So I’m breaking up with you. Have fun being miserable.”
13. “I probably won’t be able to tell you this again, so let me say it now: I genuinely did love you. There were simply too many differences between us that I can’t see myself loving you forever. It’s easier to break up with you now than to carry on pretending that I care for you.”
14. “I just don’t love you anymore. I think you can understand that. It didn’t happen slowly, it didn’t happen all of a sudden. It just happened. And I can’t change that. So it’s easier to walk away than to watch you love me when I don’t feel anything for you anymore.”
15. “I hope you understand my decision to break up. This isn’t easy for me either. What we had was special and you really did mean a lot to me, but I just can’t pretend like I’m in love with you anymore. It’s better if we broke up than for both of us to stay in a loveless relationship.”
16. “I see the way you look at him/her. I’m not blind. It wasn’t easy for me to see all that happen right in front of my eyes, so I need to break us up. Our relationship hasn’t been healthy for a while, so let’s just separate before we truly break each other beyond repair.”
17. “I never thought that I’d be saying this, but we need to break up. I wanted to love you forever, but this obviously isn’t working out for either of us. Please don’t cry, I don’t deserve your tears. I hope you find happiness one day!”
18. “I hope you can forgive me one day for every time I’ve wronged you. There were too many occasions when you should have let go of me, but you didn’t. So I’m letting go of us right now. We both deserve a break from this fiasco of a relationship.”
19. “Only I know how much I loved you. You can’t tell me that I never did just because I’m ending things right now! You have no idea what this is doing to me and how hard it was to make this decision. We simply don’t work together anymore, can’t you see that?”
20. “Sending this breakup text is painful enough, please don’t make this harder for both of us. We’re both suffering, but I believe that we’ll be better off without each other. You can’t expect me to stay and try to change myself for you. I won’t do it.”
21. “As much as my broken heart hurts, it’s still better than the pain I feel when you lie to me. Goodbye, I hope I never see you again.”
22. “I’m breaking up with you. Even though it feels awful to do this over text, I still think that it’s better than nothing. Maybe I’ll regret my decision sometime in the future, but right now, I know this is the only option.”
23. “I didn’t want to break up with you over text, but I can’t wait any longer. This has been eating at me for a long time now and you need to know this. We don’t belong together.”
24. “I feel like you’re just wasting my time at this point. I don’t mean to hurt you, but simply doesn’t feel right anymore. My feelings for you have faded into oblivion, so it’s better to just break up than to hold on to something that obviously doesn’t mean anything anymore.”
25. “I need to get this off my chest, so I’m sorry that I’m sending you a breakup text. I’m not in love with you anymore, haven’t been for quite a while now actually. I know we made some amazing memories, but that’s about it. We don’t have anything else going for us. So let’s just break up already and move on.”
26. “There’s nothing more painful than staying in a loveless relationship. That’s what’s happening, isn’t it? You don’t love me anymore and it’s obvious. Because I want to be the bigger person, I’m going to end our misery and break up with you right now. Let’s hope we both find what we deserve.”
27. “You used to make me feel so special, loved, and cared for. I haven’t felt like that next to you for a very long time now. So please understand what I’m about to say: I’m breaking up with you. We’re both at fault here, so I hope you won’t get mad. Goodbye.”
28. “You’ve stopped caring for me and this relationship. At this point, you only make me feel like a burden. I deserve better than that and you deserve someone who appreciates your minimal effort. That someone isn’t me. Good luck and goodbye.”
29. “We’ve lost our spark, haven’t we? There’s no passion between us. Even our friends have noticed how we’ve changed. We don’t love each other anymore. Please, don’t make this harder than it already is. Let’s just break up and move on with our lives.”
30. “It’s sad when you realize that you planned an entire future with someone who so obviously isn’t right for you. I imagined growing old with you, but now I can’t imagine our tomorrow anymore. That’s why I’m breaking up with you right now. We aren’t right for each other and it shows. Let’s just end this misery.”
31. “I know we’ve had the best time together, but it’s finally time to go our separate ways. There’s no reason to pretend like we’re right for each other any longer.”
32. “I never thought I’d send you a breakup text, but here it is. The one thing I never wanted to do was say goodbye to you and leave. But there’s no way what we have can turn into something serious and healthy. We’re too toxic for each other.”
33. “Saying goodbye to the person you thought would be the love of your life is heartbreaking. But it has to be done. This is me breaking up with you before things escalate into something that’ll make us hate each other. I hope you understand my decision. I really wish you all the best in this world!”
34. “I ignored everyone when they told me we weren’t right for each other. After a while, I finally realized they were right. We’re not right for each other, because I was loyal to you and you couldn’t be bothered to stay loyal. So let’s just end this so you can go and have fun with her!”
35. “I’m so tired of your empty promises. You’re obviously not going to change and I obviously can’t wait for you forever. I’m breaking up with you. It’s easier like this for both of us.”
36. “Don’t think that I’m breaking up with you because you’re not good enough. You’re more than enough. I just don’t think that you’re right for me anymore. Please don’t jump to conclusions, you’re gorgeous, I just think that there’s someone else out there who’s better suited for me.”
37. “I don’t know when I stopped loving you. It just kind of happened and now it’s too late to mourn the lack of those feelings. The truth is I don’t love you anymore and I can’t stay with you. It just doesn’t feel right.”
38. “Sending a text to break up with you is everything but easy for me. Can’t imagine how hard it must be for you to read it. Especially because you were someone I loved very much. It’s just that I’ve met someone else and I hope you understand when I say that we need to break up.”
