The million-dollar question: Why do men hide their feelings?
Women hide their feelings as well and we can’t really say that it’s strictly a gender issue but for the sake of argument, let’s talk about men today.
You are seeing all the signs that he likes you but at the same time, you see how much he’s fighting his feelings for you.
He’s fighting his feelings, denying them.
Whenever he’s asked about them by anyone, he keeps on saying how delusional everyone is, even though he continues finding every single way possible to treat you like you’re special.
You see him more often than anyone because he always makes time for you, always compliments you, and finds every single excuse to touch you.
You and everyone else around you are sure that he likes you, but you wonder why he hides his feelings.
If you want to understand him and help him be more open about his feelings for you, without having to make the first move, you will have to understand why he’s hiding his feelings in the first place.
1. Gender stereotypes
I would love to exclude this as a reason, but we all know that it’s true.
A possible reason why he’s hiding his feelings for you is that he believes being a ‘real man’ doesn’t include showing emotions.
It’s sad, I know, but a huge number of men have been brought up to believe that in order to be a strong man, they can’t be vulnerable.
You can’t really help him too much if this is truly an issue he has, as he has lived his entire life believing that he can’t show his emotions.
2. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling
Feelings can be very confusing sometimes. A very good reason he might be hiding his feelings is that he doesn’t understand what they actually are.
He just wants to make sure so that he doesn’t end up hurting you.
What he’s feeling could be affection, just physical attraction, love, or infatuation.
His emotions are strong, yes, but it does take time to actually understand them and make sure that it’s really love.
It’s especially hard for him if it’s mixed in with the fact that he hasn’t been able to express his emotions throughout his life.
3. He doesn’t feel comfortable around you
If he actually likes you but isn’t comfortable around you yet, then you should understand where he’s coming from.
He doesn’t feel comfortable enough to talk to you about how he feels and to explain his emotions.
For all he knows, you could laugh in his face instead of trying to listen. Just give him some time and space.
You should focus on creating a safe space for him to figure out his feelings and talk to you about them.
Don’t force him to do anything he doesn’t want to do. Once he feels comfortable, he’ll reveal his feelings.
4. He’s afraid of heartbreak
We all hate it when our heart gets broken. Heartbreak hurts like hell, so why would we want to intentionally go into a situation that might hurt?
Instead, he’s hiding his feelings and waiting for them to either go away on their own or for you to make the first move.
Either way, you can’t make him say what he’s feeling without creating a safe space for him first.
I know it seems like a lot of work, but men do have a harder time getting out of their shell and being more vulnerable.
5. He’s been hurt before
He has learned the hard way that being open with his emotions only brings pain.
That’s why he has buried it all deep down and isn’t able to show his true self to anyone.
Even if he’s openly flirting with you or laughing with you, he still won’t admit his feelings for you.
Why should he? You might be just like the person who broke his heart before.
Try as you might, you can’t change his past. He’s guarded for a reason.
6. He might already have a girlfriend
Actually, a good reason for hiding his feelings is that he might have a girlfriend and she sure as hell doesn’t deserve a man going around and flirting with other women, so he hides what he truly feels for you.
He’s probably thinking that if he continues to ignore his feelings, they’ll go away on their own.
He wants to save everyone from a broken heart, so doesn’t act on his emotions.
It doesn’t matter how much he wants to, he’s still trying hard not to.
7. He’s scared to lose you as a friend
How long have you been friends? Years? Decades?
It’s a story like in a coming of age movie, where two best friends are slowly but surely falling in love with each other.
It doesn’t always end like it ends in the movies, with the pair of them falling in love and living happily ever after.
In real life, these stories often have a very bad ending. Who knows how many times he’s asked himself: “Am I in the friendzone?“
8. He’s waiting for you to make the first move
There is a misconception that the man has to make the first move.
If you’re waiting for him to take the plunge and tell you how he feels, you might be waiting a long time.
He’s waiting for you to make the first move and there might be quite a few reasons for that.
He might have never done that before, he might be very insecure or shy, or he just believes that you are not that into him to begin with.
9. He’s waiting for the right moment
He likes you and you know it, but he’s just so afraid of screwing things up that he’s better off hiding his feelings for now.
Why? Well, because he’s trying to find the right time and place to confess his feelings.
You deserve someone who’ll give you the best confession ever and he is prepared to be that someone for you.
Even if it’s not a grand gesture, even if it’s just him and you, talking about your feelings, it doesn’t matter.
He just wants to make sure you understand him completely.