You’re simply confused and you’re wondering whether breaking up with him was a mistake. You like to believe that you were right to make this decision but it’s not easy for you to see that clearly.
Your life doesn’t seem to be any better now that he’s gone and if anything, you’re more miserable than ever. Is this just post-break-up depression or is it something more?
What if you were wrong? What if he was the best thing that ever happened in your life?
These questions make your head spin even more. Your friends say that you just miss him too much and that you’re going to be fine.
But what if things don’t get any better? Let’s figure out whether breaking up with him was a mistake.
1. You broke up because of pressure
You weren’t ready for the things that he talked about with others. Everyone around you expected you two to get married sooner rather than later but it wasn’t what you wanted at the time.
The pressure got to your head and your relationship obviously suffered.
You didn’t make any decisions for yourself anymore, you just played along with others’ expectations, which made you put aside both your relationship and your own wants and needs.
You forgot that this was about you two and not about others.
2. You still think about him
How much time has passed since you broke up? It’s been months and you’re still thinking about him, right?
This is a clear sign that breaking up with him was a mistake. You’re always thinking about the good old days and never the bad ones.
You remember just about everything that happened but you can’t seem to remember what was so awful that you had to leave.
Whenever something happens in your life now, whether it’s good or bad, you want to tell him. He’s the first person you think about sharing all of it with.
Even when your friends talk about their relationships, you always think about your ex and how you’d work through problems. That’s why you feel like you’ll never get over him, as he’s constantly on your mind.
3. He makes up a lot of the person you are today
We’re all aware of the fact that we tend to pick up certain traits from our partner. I mean, that’s a normal thing that happens.
When you spend a lot of time with your co-workers, you tend to pick up their behavior, so it’s no surprise that you’ll start to talk like your partner or share the same worldviews.
However, breaking up with him was a mistake when you understand that he makes up a lot of the person that you are today.
Let’s be honest, you wouldn’t take on so much of his personality if he didn’t give you good traits that you wanted to incorporate in your own.
Now, you understand that you share your sense of humor with him and you’ve become a person who listens more than she talks, because he was always the one who listened.
A huge part of him is evident in everything that you do.
4. You’d drop everything to be there for him
If anything bad ever happened to him, you’d run to be there for him and you wouldn’t think twice about it. It wouldn’t matter whether you had someone new in your life, as you’d drop everything in seconds and rush to his rescue.
You simply want to make sure that he’s doing okay and that he doesn’t have any issues. If he ended up in the hospital for whatever reason, you’d be the first one there.
He also knows that he can always count on you. He knows that you’re a person who’d do anything to make sure that he was safe and sound.
This isn’t really someone’s way of thinking if the break-up was a good idea to begin with.
5. You think that he’s a better person than you are
You’re in constant awe of this man. You see how ambitious and empathetic he is and how much other people love him.
Everyone seems to understand what an absolutely amazing human being he actually is.
I always believe that the person who’s right for us is someone who’s better than ourself. They’re someone we can learn a lot from and someone who’s able to help us on our journey to becoming the best version of ourself.
So, breaking up with him was a mistake if this is the case. Maybe you made the decision to walk away from him because of this belief but perhaps you should rethink your choice.
6. You left because of a traumatic event
Something bad happened and here you are right now. This traumatic event could be something like the death of a loved one or a diagnosis that left you questioning your entire life.
Trauma isn’t something that we can deal with easily. Our coping mechanism can be that we fall apart even more and try desperately to get our life together just to avoid dealing with the problem.
So if one of your decisions at the time was to break up your relationship, I can tell you with certainty that it was a mistake. You don’t have to be single to deal with these things.
You could’ve stayed with him and had the support you needed. Now, you’re all alone and you also have one more issue to cope with.
7. You never tried to deal with your issues
Breaking up with him was a mistake if you never tried to work through your problems or addressed them head-on. You never communicated about your issues and you simply kept quiet about everything that bothered you both.
This also means that you have poor boundaries and that you weren’t ready for a mature relationship, which usually happens when you take your partner for granted or when you simply give up on him.
You feel like you don’t have to work on things anymore because you’re just waiting for a moment to split up.
Don’t you think that you could’ve worked through your problems if you had just given it a try?
This definitely means that there was potential in your relationship but you never wanted to explore it. You may have lost the love of your life because of your lack of effort.